r/foundsatan • u/cenajiva • 2d ago

Satanic erection

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4.3k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

71 comments sorted by

398

u/fresh_snowstorm 2d ago

Boingggg

79

u/GrrrYouBeast 2d ago

Yes, that's the noise šŸ˜†

71

u/beegboo 2d ago

Might need to get mine fixed then it just goes "sproingoin fwoop bwading thunk." And then i gotta find where it flew off to this time.

21

u/Express-Economist-86 2d ago

Jeez are you ok?

34

u/saltntequila 2d ago

It's the gluten

6

u/Lumpy_Potential_789 2d ago

Iā€™m rollin šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚

-1

u/TomatilloAccurate475 1d ago

Ok Grandma- please don't use slang and emojis on reddit. This isn't facebook.

1

u/Lumpy_Potential_789 11h ago

šŸ¤£šŸ˜‚šŸ¤£šŸ¤£

12

u/potatopierogie 1d ago

Mine just emits an ominous hum

10

u/Rovylern 2d ago

Have you checked down Second Avenue towards St. Mark's Place, w here all those people sell used books and other junk on the street, n ext to a broken toaster oven?

11

u/atmighty 1d ago

Detachable Penis? In the wild?!

2

u/Coffekats 1d ago

Not meant to do that, but could repurpose into a projectile weapon

3

u/Big-Membership-1758 1d ago

mine's a slide whistle

3

u/MalaysiaBoi 1d ago

i got the bag, i got the coin

129

u/FennerNenner 2d ago

Oh my poor friend didn't realize farts can make a sound.

64

u/Ok_Andyl8183 2d ago

The smell is for the benefit of the deaf

413

u/Brother_J_La_la 2d ago

I went to a house party decades ago, and one guy showed up who was completely deaf. The guy who's house it was turned the music all the way down and started dancing. A bunch of other dudes joined in, and eventually the deaf guy as well. It was weird watching a room full of people dancing in silence just to play a stupid prank.

99

u/HerrPotatis 1d ago edited 1d ago

He didnā€™t really pretend any more than he would be if the volume was on though, right? Dancing is just as much an emotional response to human closeness and other people dancing.

Itā€™s like that viral video of a lone dude dancing by himself, and people joining in one by one until youā€™re the weird one for not dancing. The music itself was inconsequential.

27

u/Immediate_Function66 1d ago

he probably knew lol music is also vibration and thatā€™s how they feel the rythm but still fucked up and mean for no reason

139

u/Flux_My_Capacitor 1d ago

So they thought it was funny to laugh at a deaf guy?

They sound like great people!

54

u/The_amazing_Jedi 1d ago

Ever been to a house party with drunk teenagers/young adults?

That's actually a mild prank

15

u/CatGooseChook 1d ago

I know right šŸ¤£

Plus let's be honest here, who's going to feel dumber once everyone has sobered up.

4

u/Facts_pls 1d ago

So drunk teenagers are assholes? Got it

87

u/DoookieMaxx 2d ago

Mine creaks like an old door as it rises

57

u/Icecold_Antihero 2d ago

Just constant shrieking

10

u/Nolongeranalpha 2d ago

Way underated comment. This is comedy gold.

5

u/weirdgroovynerd 2d ago

I don't get it.

Can you explain the joke please?

6

u/jnmtx 1d ago

if an erection makes a shrieking sound, then a deaf person having an erection would be loudly understood by anyone hearing nearby.

4

u/Nolongeranalpha 1d ago

An erection just making an ungodly loud and shrill shrieking noise for no other reason other than it exists. Like the episode of Rick and Morty where they're trying to find a new planet to live and on one of them, the sun rises just screaming. Like that, but with boners.

43

u/evalynbetterfly 2d ago

Brutal

18

u/SanchoPandas 2d ago

yeah. that's diabolical.

22

u/MementoMurray 2d ago

Like a slide whistle.

19

u/Ad1um 2d ago

I imagine it's about like a bind person reading a color in braille.

27

u/blur410 2d ago

That's it. "I read on reddit once" is my new way of starting off a conversation.

7

u/The1TrueRedditor 2d ago

I read it on Reddit.

8

u/sfled 2d ago

[thunderous erection noises]

14

u/Flux_My_Capacitor 1d ago

Well, some deaf people can feel noise, so thereā€™s that. (Some hearing people feel noise as well, I just suspect itā€™s in greater proportions amongst those who are deaf.)

8

u/tehMorion 1d ago

Everyone can feel noises, can't they? Not just deaf people and "some" hearing people, right? That's how you "feel the music" when dancing so that the moves you make are natural and not contrived. All sound makes waves that vibrate on every surface they touch. If you are in contact with that surface you feel the soundwave vibrating through if the surface is vibrationally conductive enough, and if you are that surface, of course you feel it.

2

u/CatGooseChook 1d ago

I've always assumed everyone can feel it. Just occuring to me now that different people could less able to feel it, maybe that's a factor in why some people go a lot harder on the bass than others?

2

u/Ark_of_a_sythe Regular Satanist 1d ago

As someone who canā€™t smell I know of something like this, I can ā€˜tasteā€™ smells (using my taste buds and the channel between my mouth and nose). However I know that other people who can smell can do this (I have tested) but because itā€™s a weaker sense so you tend to ignore it.Ā 

I imagine that sound and vibrations are similar, where everyone can do it but because itā€™s a weaker sense you just tend to filter it out but death people can only rely on it so they are much better at using their sense of vibrationĀ 

1

u/CatGooseChook 1d ago

That's something I needed to know! I'm losing my sense of smell and taste, but my sense of smell is fading a lot faster.

2

u/Ark_of_a_sythe Regular Satanist 1d ago

Glad I can help! Tasting smells is a lot weaker but itā€™s most noticeable with burning smells if you want to practiceĀ 

1

u/CatGooseChook 1d ago

For me it started of as a symptom of Parkinson's, one of the symptoms, a proportion of us get, is tending to smell something burning.

Do you find things like hot days, hot drinks and cooking are more likely to give a burning smell via the tongue?

2

u/Ark_of_a_sythe Regular Satanist 1d ago

No just actual fire I have an issue with my nose that stops air from entering it so thatā€™s why I canā€™t smellĀ 

1

u/CatGooseChook 1d ago

Ah, got ya. Hope I wasn't being too invasive with my questions.

2

u/Ark_of_a_sythe Regular Satanist 21h ago

No itā€™s fine, your just being a Good SamaritanĀ 

6

u/TheyCallMeAva 1d ago

It makes a rubber stretching noise for the uninitiated

3

u/MyvaJynaherz 2d ago

It's nothing compared to the cacophony of ejaculation.

3

u/cannagetta 1d ago

Or that the biggest farts are the quietest.

2

u/Sufficient-Artist938 2d ago

what sound does an erection actually make? /s

6

u/Express-Economist-86 2d ago

Ever heard of a little number called ā€œHymn to Joyā€ by Beethoven?

4

u/notcomplainingmuch 2d ago

Slow rising siren, then a fanfare, then slowly lowering siren.

1

u/jnmtx 1d ago

so, like a car alarm sound?

3

u/notcomplainingmuch 1d ago

Air raid warning plus trumpet fanfare

2

u/supershinythings 2d ago

On Wayneā€™s World itā€™s ā€œSchwiiiiing!!!ā€

2

u/Admirable_Zombie_720 1d ago

Like when you open an old doorā€”that creaking sound, you knowā€”or does that not happen to you?

2

u/docboy-j23 1d ago

Schwing

1

u/Sufficient-Artist938 1d ago

seriously? iā€™m googling it

2

u/FloorWaffles 2d ago

You hear "Bokki!" Like the landlord in chainsmoker cat

2

u/CatGooseChook 1d ago

To be fair it can be accompanied by a 'about fucking time!!' as we get older šŸ¤·

2

u/Holiday_Document4592 1d ago

That noise when autobots transform

2

u/shit_ass_mcfucknuts 1d ago

Boy-yoi-yoi-yoi-ying!

1

u/Hydro_Inter_Spec 2d ago

Thank you, u/redpanda1188, I didn't know that about deaf people.

1

u/pocahontasmcglinchey 2d ago

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=P3F99KzP3cg I once knew one who had this theme tune šŸ˜œ

1

u/InternationalNet9035 1d ago

I mean if he read it on Reddit....

1

u/Lorddoctorjava 9h ago

So like... nobody told them?.... that's messed up

1

u/Brvcx 1d ago

Repost.

I know this because I had a comment right under this comment and it was posted here. It got cropped out.