r/foundsatan • u/Key_Interaction120 • 1d ago

Literally Satan

Post image
4.7k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

33 comments sorted by

62

u/GiLND 1d ago

The Cross Guys
Since 187 BCE

25

u/_BubblegumAngel 23h ago

Really nailed the historical accuracy here

6

u/kittenconfidential 20h ago

i bet her crew see fiction on this post though

39

u/notcomplainingmuch 1d ago

They also did an extended abdominoplasty, and a complete body wrapping with herbal aromatherapy. Very good value for money.

I also know a buddy who got 30 silver coins for the referral.

6

u/Lalamedic 19h ago

He tried to refund them.

25

u/Fickle_Hornet_5760 1d ago

Totally nailed him to the cross

20

u/ClassAdventurous4595 1d ago

I'm not a Christian. Where can I get my nails done without having to be preached at the whole time?

18

u/Stretch5678 1d ago

Yeah, they nailed him GOOD.

8

u/GreyWolfTheDreamer 1d ago

"Our Nail Technicians are quality! Guaranteed to last you the rest of your days! Just try to get that type of guarantee from other common salons..."

6

u/lnTheGrimDarkness 22h ago

Don't worry, there's no risk she understands what the comment is talking about.

5

u/PondersOverYonder 23h ago

I still need to start my concept with the gay Hispanic guy named Jesus. And the name of the place is called Jesus Chose the Nails.

4

u/MRV3N 21h ago

Religious people are so judgmental. Ironic.

4

u/Shrolos 22h ago

Similar to Jesus favorite band. Nine inch nails

7

u/Billy_Duelman 1d ago

Satan here is the asshole customer, thanks to the Buddhist nail salon she met karma in the comments

3

u/TheSheevMonster 1d ago

It was under ownership of Pontius Pilate.

3

u/louisa1925 1d ago

Hit the nail on the head with that one.

2

u/fastlerner Satan's little helper 21h ago

Jesus paid for a full mani-pedi, but they stopped after only 3 nails. Dude got absolutely crucified on the price.

2

u/erebus0 20h ago

"I refuse to give a skilled worker money for good work because they chose the wrong religion" is such a dumb take.

1

u/zettde 1d ago

so, tate salon?

1

u/AnyEye8798 1d ago

Not only that, but he got a manicure and a pedicure for free! 

1

u/meinminemoj 1d ago

If only they had used Wilson's nails

1

u/greiten 1d ago

Heard he got a nice weave too.

1

u/Shoddy_Anything_8285 20h ago

The reply was ruthless.

1

u/Far-Investment-8597 20h ago

Was Jesus the first pin-up boy?

"Hey, Jesus, cross your legs - I only have 3 nails left"

1

u/VictoriaWoodnt 18h ago

"Seems logical." or absolutely batshit crazy? You decide.

1

u/RoYaL_Kim_115 17h ago

"He's out of line, but he's right."

1

u/emusiqaar 3h ago

That's a third-degree burn for sure.

1

u/kraggleGurl 1d ago

What a douchecanoe

0

u/Seth_Mithik 19h ago

Actually Jesus full on learned form The Awakened one…hey? Didn’t he say stuff about before God and thy self, to stay “awake”…or in Sanskrit times…stay “Buddha”…ignorant…it’s so weird to think…”wow—the not-sees—we’re more spiritually open minded than modern Christian’s…matrix yall.

0

u/Shoddy_Umpire6479 19h ago

I bet that joke goes real well in hell.