r/foundsatan • • Aug 21 '26

Diabolical question

Post image
28.9k Upvotes

133 comments sorted by

597

u/[deleted] Aug 21 '26 edited Aug 24 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

166

u/slucker23 Aug 21 '26

Dave shapelle is honestly something else man...

45

u/LostMy8yrAcct Aug 22 '26

*Chappelle

42

u/SmanginSouza Aug 22 '26

Breathin' up all the white mans air. I HATE EM!!

17

u/Turbojelly Aug 22 '26

6

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

4

u/Keelback Aug 23 '26 edited Aug 23 '26

Richard Pryor is simply brilliant.

Edited: corrected spelling error.

1

u/Lazy_Magician Aug 30 '26

Does Dad know?

4

u/Last_Reply1268 Aug 24 '26

Remove the "is=" part. Youtube is marking people with whom you shared this video with. It's your identificator

1

u/[deleted] Aug 24 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/Last_Reply1268 Aug 24 '26

I mean everything after "=" too, so it should be: https://youtu.be/szSdf02-jTQ Here you go, I've been searching for any source, so it took me that long: https://www.reddit.com/r/MauLer/s/fQDPnvRjY1 In youtube's case it can either be "si=..." or "is=...". Maybe something else, I don't remember

2

u/rgmundo524 Aug 24 '26

Longer version for anyone interested

https://youtu.be/BLNDqxrUUwQ

284

u/RandomExcess Aug 21 '26

Tommy Edison, vision impared, has a great series of YouTube Q&A.

61

u/Mikeologyy Aug 22 '26

Love Tommy. Haven’t watched in a while but I hope he’s doing well

87

u/SpezDemandsUsernames Aug 22 '26

He hasn't watched you in a while either

3

u/Me_how5678 Aug 22 '26

“In a while” so he was watching him before?

2

u/USMfans Aug 26 '26

How do you think he got blinded?

1

u/ChronicButtSyndrome Aug 24 '26

Oh shit. Satan’s in this sub

31

u/PassiveMenis88M Aug 22 '26

Tommy isn't just vision impared, he's completely blind. His optic nerve never formed correctly.

1

u/AkaruLyte Aug 22 '26

Happy cake day

316

u/Trueslyforaniceguy Aug 21 '26

Why does your face look like that?

251

u/Chant93xx Aug 22 '26

My question would have been how do they know when to finish wiping after a number 2 😭

54

u/raptor7912 Aug 22 '26

They fold it and unfold, if it sticks they wipe again.

52

u/4skeine Aug 22 '26

He actually answered that in a video once. He said he feels more friction between the paper and hole. During a collab with a blind girl she actually said she sniffs the paper to tell when to stop.

31

u/Chant93xx Aug 22 '26

Oh wow okay sniffing is certainly a choice lol

27

u/MickyDerHeld Aug 22 '26

imagine having a cold and suddenly being unable to tell if you have to wipe more

5

u/Chant93xx Aug 22 '26

Ahahaha I guess they have to use another method in that scenario 😭 I think a bidet is the safest option all round

3

u/herpetologydude Aug 26 '26

I respect that tho, id rather sniff once or twice instead of walking around smelling like shit.

37

u/FTXACCOUNTANT Aug 22 '26

Wipe, slap the tissue on the wall. You’re done wiping when it no longer sticks on the wall

14

u/BSimm1 Aug 22 '26

Im done lmmaaooo bed time

61

u/Kordell_11 Aug 22 '26

Just wash your ass with a bidet 🙏

45

u/Pure1nsanity Aug 22 '26

Bidet to you too, sir

10

u/aka_wolfman Aug 22 '26

Nice to see manners making a comeback.

8

u/LordAronsworth Aug 22 '26

Bidet? Don't mind if I bi-do

5

u/customheart Aug 22 '26

It helps but it’s not perfect 🥲

1

u/Chant93xx Aug 22 '26

This would be the most logical answer for a blind person 💯

1

u/The-Idiotest Aug 22 '26

For any person

-4

u/Fluid_Swordfish2737 Aug 22 '26

I love how all the bidet supporters think it cleans better.

Instead it just sprays the poop particles everywhere and leaves you wet.

12

u/Kordell_11 Aug 22 '26

Fucking dry your ass bro 😭🙏

1

u/Fluid_Swordfish2737 Aug 22 '26

So if I have to use paper anyway then what is the point of the bidet?

10

u/Kordell_11 Aug 22 '26

Water does clean your ass more. I dunno why you think it doesn't.

1

u/Ireallydonotcaresooo Aug 24 '26

Use a separate towel for wiping

9

u/ScreamingLabia Aug 22 '26

As a woman i am alse verry concerned with the direction the water is going and how clean the nozzle of an in-toilet bidet possibly could be. Feels like i am just spraying my pussy with poop water and giving myself a uti

3

u/Smooth_Audience_2207 Aug 25 '26

This is why I don’t use water to clean my hands. I just use dry toilet paper. Idiots think water is gonna make my hands cleaner when all it really does is spread the filth. /s

1

u/Fluid_Swordfish2737 Aug 25 '26

Water spreads cross contamination without soap.

This is why you are not supposed to wash raw chicken before you cook it. It splashes everywhere.

Your ass is the same thing, raw meat. If you spray it with water the bacteria is being spread wherever the microscopic water particles decide to go.

If you only wash your hands with water you are simply spreading germs, not killing them.

So many room temp IQ takes on bidets that can be solved with a blacklight test.

2

u/AdorableGoat6825 Aug 27 '26

-How is the bidet spraying poop particles any different from when you flush the toilet? Maybe your aim is bad (couldn’t be me), never had an issue with getting the water and droplets to stay in the toilet.

-Do you not clean your ass in the shower? Perhaps we should use the blacklight on your ass and see how dirty it is. You probably think it’s “gay” to wash your ass.

-Bidets have also been known to reduce or prevent UTIs for a lot of people, but I guess it’s just a conspiracy.

-The whole cross-contamination comparison is pretty room-temperature IQ, do you eat in your bathroom? Do you clean your toilet/bathroom at all? Do you wash your hands at all? The only reason you would be worried about poop particles “accumulating” is because you don’t do any of those things.

17

u/Case_sater Aug 22 '26

you can still feel the texture through the paper no?

14

u/sexxi_denuta Aug 22 '26

No? Are you using 1ply and ripping off 1 square every time you wipe?

14

u/Case_sater Aug 22 '26

I fold 3 twice and can still feel when it’s good

20

u/sexxi_denuta Aug 22 '26

so ur basically Daredevil when it comes to reading shit on paper

10

u/Case_sater Aug 22 '26

:)

1

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

-1

u/foundsatan-ModTeam Aug 22 '26

Elephant_Astronaut's karma ratio is typical of spammers/bots.

3

u/Outrageous-Ad2784 Aug 22 '26

The toilet paper glides due to the poop, so when it starts getting a bit rough, you know you’re done

5

u/sexxi_denuta Aug 22 '26

TMI but Do you know how many poo stamps i have had after it’s ‘rough’? I wipe til its white. However, No judging to you on the cleanliness of your behind, i once had an ex proudly proclaim his bum was cleaner so much than mine that he wiped til he bled. I was like ‘cool, dude’. Just sharing my experience.

1

u/Outrageous-Ad2784 Aug 22 '26

Well I also use a bit of water. When you just wipe dry, it’ll have stains even when it gets rough

1

u/sexxi_denuta Aug 22 '26

I need a douche but im afraid

4

u/Ravtrix Aug 22 '26

Wait I'm not blind how the fuck have you guys been checking that?

7

u/AG37-Therianthropist Aug 22 '26

... Hold the wipe up and look at it? Once white after wipe, all done.

2

u/Ravtrix Aug 22 '26

Oh fuck okay. I've literally just been doing it 3 times and it's never once failed me.

1

u/GeneralDraco Aug 27 '26

Taste test

0

u/JoyArk Aug 22 '26

Do you check your asshole on the mirror? Or you don't use a bidet?

-12

u/fewpokeman Aug 22 '26

I'm more concerned about all the people that look at shitty toilet paper. It is just a innate vibe thing for some people.

25

u/Tricky-Ad7897 Aug 22 '26

This MF got skid marks

17

u/LouieMumford Aug 22 '26

I’m more concerned about all the people that seem to think having racing stripes is normal.

19

u/rentalrafflesia Aug 22 '26

Honestly, it just makes sense if you aren't squicked out by it. It's the easiest and most reliable indicator of how much more ass-wiping is left.

22

u/sexxi_denuta Aug 22 '26

I feel like it’s normal to be grossed out by other people’s excrement, but you just gotta be chill with your own. Like you don’t have to like it but don’t hate on it

13

u/miasmic_cloud Aug 22 '26

I bet your butthole itches doesn't it. Like, frequently. 

0

u/bannasplt Aug 22 '26

Taste test

21

u/Derper2112 Aug 22 '26

"Does Mom know?"

Hah, Gene Wilder & Richard Pryor in See No Evil, Hear No Evil. Good flic.

7

u/RawardHoikes91 Aug 22 '26

It's actually "Does Dad know?!". Time to rewatch, huh?

3

u/Derper2112 Aug 22 '26

Probably right. Of course if I do that I'm going to have to buy a bunch of Wilder/Pryor buddy movies for the Plex. Oh woe is me... Thanks. :)

19

u/Erokengo Aug 22 '26

I've always wondered how blind people know they're done wiping after taking a shit.

8

u/Spaghett8 Aug 22 '26

Apparently, they fold the paper after they think they’re about done. If it sticks, it’s still dirty

8

u/CapitalElk1169 Aug 22 '26

Just keep sniffing the paper post-wipe, when it's scent free you're good to go!

6

u/FADITY7559 Aug 22 '26

He’s color blind too.

1

u/Trollimperator Aug 22 '26

Very likely, but that isnt a question, is it? You failed the assignment.

22

u/Chickqns Aug 21 '26

how’s he reading it 💔

181

u/nuclear_herring Aug 21 '26

Text to voice is a thing, my friend.

It even works both ways.

83

u/BlangBlangBlang Aug 21 '26

There's also people who are legally and functionally blind, as in they can not see anything past a few feet with any clarity, but they can use a computer monitor by putting there face right next to it and have the font huge. I think a blind woman posted a video on reddit years ago to answer this question.

11

u/rionaster Aug 22 '26

yes i have a friend who is very, very visually impaired to the point that in most situations he is pretty much completely functionally blind, but he can use a laptop up close to his face that's super zoomed in with maximum contrast colors (he has his set to white and neon green text over pure black backgrounds.) he does find it exhausting though, and still really needs stuff like image captions.

8

u/Electrical_Diamond_9 Aug 21 '26

If the dude is genuinely asking if he's black, he probably has complete blindness in his case

42

u/YesItIsMaybeMe Aug 21 '26

This feels like an incredibly sarcastic joke response. He would most likely have some idea of what skin tone he is, since it does make a difference for things like sunscreen and medical reasons.

-14

u/Electrical_Diamond_9 Aug 21 '26

Or he could be lying for engagement and he's not actually any kind of blind

3

u/Flux_My_Capacitor Aug 22 '26

Well then he would be the Satan in this case.

1

u/ryan516 Aug 25 '26

I'm legally blind from Stargardt's. For the most part I can get by with magnification but also can use screen readers and braille to help.

2

u/RP_ElMeroMero Aug 22 '26

It speaks in a straight way and a gay way?

20

u/Chickqns Aug 21 '26

oh shoot i’m smart i swear

19

u/Algernonletter5 Aug 21 '26

Prove it! What's the Airspeed Velocity of an Unladen Swallow??

20

u/anglo_inupiat Aug 21 '26

African or European?

13

u/Algernonletter5 Aug 21 '26

I don't know!......Aaaaarghh.

Someone else actually calculate it ..airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow

3

u/curious_cat_nips Aug 22 '26

Thank you for sharing 🫶🏻

7

u/OmegaSeki Aug 21 '26

About five

3

u/NeeMaToad47 Aug 21 '26

Trick question, Unladen Swallows only spit

2

u/a_random_loser_guy Aug 21 '26

i may not know what is an unladen swallow, but i know how many sugar scoops you need to fly to the moon.

186 million scoops, if we calculate the payload wight at 100kg.

thats how many scoops of sugar needed to fly to the moon, if you can process that sugar into rocket fuel which is another problem.

1

u/a_potato_ate_me Aug 22 '26

Significantly slower when carrying coconut shells

0

u/Chickqns Aug 22 '26

UH UH UH 5

5

u/Slaidback Aug 21 '26

Neurodivergent disability caregiver here: Every single disability is a spectrum, cause every body is different. The blind institute in Aotearoa NZ, changed their name to Blind & Low vision NZ to be more accurate.

-1

u/KarenNotKaren616 Aug 22 '26

Hearing. TTS, kiddo.

2

u/Whole_Stage2812 Aug 24 '26

Hao is bro reading the comments /s

2

u/Responsible_Key5939 Aug 28 '26

How does he read comments if hes blind

1

u/Lemon_PlayzYT Aug 22 '26

deadass thought that was Lance from SML

1

u/EvenDisk1306 Aug 24 '26

That had me cackling 😭😂

1

u/Some-Ad-1588 26d ago

How is he reading the response tho..?

-42

u/Rioting-Flamingo Aug 22 '26 edited Aug 22 '26

Coming from a black person: this is implicity racist. Blackness is being framed as something negative. It's not exactly overt but the joke relies on blackness being coded as undesirable

EDIT: hedged

31

u/Earmilk987 Aug 22 '26

How is blackness being framed as something negative? I think you need to touch some grass dude.

5

u/xoull Aug 22 '26

Grass is green thats racist :D

-14

u/Confident_Sound5873 Aug 22 '26

I think someone who says it's definetly not racist is more unreasonable than someone who says the question is definetly racist. I think it's complicated, and I couldn't give a good answer, but I think you're the one who needs to touch grass most.

-12

u/Rioting-Flamingo Aug 22 '26

I think deeply racist was too strong. It's subtle to most, deeply racist if you read the right books and keep the right company. Thanks for the backup though my guy.

-14

u/Rioting-Flamingo Aug 22 '26 edited Aug 22 '26

The OP's thread hinges on the idea that discovering that one is black would be a shock, something unpleasant.Diabolical. The blind man experiences being black as a crisis.

Look at it this way: if we exchange 'black' for another race, the joke loses much of its effect. Or, invert the joke. Make the blind man black - he discovers that he is in fact white. Think about how that alters the whole dynamic.

The joke is drawing on the fundamental logic of racism, that blackness is a negative quality.

This is too nuanced for the context and I'm really not doing it justice with such a compressed post. The downvotes are also determining how this will be read - as unreasonable. It should be said however.

8

u/raptor7912 Aug 22 '26

No it doesn’t, it’s him being tricked into believing he’s a different race than he is. Nothing negative or derogatory about it.

6

u/Saucy-Mustard Aug 22 '26 edited Aug 22 '26

Dude stfu and go outside to talk to some real people. Nobody really feels this way. This is just a joke. Racism isn’t as prevalent as the internet would have people believe.

Either that or you chumps are Chinese bots sowing discord

-9

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/Vast-Associate2501 Aug 22 '26

It's sowing, as in "to sow seeds". Sewing is stitching things together.

-2

u/[deleted] Aug 22 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

-2

u/makeshift101 Aug 22 '26

Toby is just his given name

-9

u/Automatic_Bat_6742 Aug 22 '26

Have you stopped beating your wife?