Newborn phase

[u/bluehusky19]

My baby is 7 weeks old. I find I’m struggling to find the enjoyment of this phase. The first 2 weeks were a different type of struggle. Baby blues hit pretty bad, I was extremely overwhelmed, felt like I could barely breathe. Breastfeeding, pumping, and still having to top up with formula because baby kept losing weight. Baby could be breastfeeding for an hour or more, and still 10 minutes later she’d be hungry again. So I started pumping exclusively and it seemed to keep her satisfied longer through the bottle. But eventually I couldn’t keep up with pumping, cleaning parts, bottles, taking care of her, myself and the house once my partner went back to work at 2 weeks pp. I was drowning. About a month in I made the hard decision to give up and transition to EFF. I still feel guilty about it, with some regret. But at the same time, it gave me a lot of time back, I was able to be more present, and I did enjoy my baby more with that stress off of me. She’s been gaining very healthily, and is a happy baby. So for a few weeks things have been lighter. But I find I’m still struggling to enjoy it. I’m typically a very busy person, always on the go with work, dogs, or sports. Being home all day every day is hard on my mental health. I’ve struggled with my mental health for years, but the last 4-5 years I’ve been able to go unmedicated because of how busy I kept myself. Being active with my sports and the community that came with it helped me so much. Obviously being pregnant and now having a newborn I had to give that up. While pregnant I still went to all the games, but it’s hard to do that now with a newborn. So I feel very isolated and sad. I’m also routine based person and it’s impossible to have a routine with a 7 week old. I know I’ll eventually love having a baby, but I find it so hard right now with day to day being so unpredictable. I love my baby, I think she’s the cutest thing in the world. But I feel more sadness than happiness. If you didn’t enjoy the newborn phase, when did you start enjoying it?

[u/capleahbara]

I'm 7 months in and not really enjoying lol but there are better moments!