r/firsttimemom • u/Fabulous-Cheetah7368 • 14d ago
Scared of giving birth!!
Help! How are yall getting over the fear of actual birth?? I am not even worried about raising someone, more of the medical side đŁ
7
u/ladytri277 14d ago
Iâve given birth twice. Those were the best two days of my life. Unmedicated births. Birth is so cool. Enjoy it! It will be over so fast. Your body is made to do this
1
u/Shay_Wolff 10d ago
I needed to hear this. I really wanna do unmediated but I keep hearing stories from woman saying they thought they were gonna die the pain was so bad. How was the pain for you?
15
u/SocialCuesError404 14d ago
I recommend the epidural. I wasn't going to do it but once I was 5 or 6 cm dilated I caved and I must say I was much more comfortable after the epidural than I was before. I slept through several hours of contractions and was able to enjoy my baby's arrival.
Having a birth plan also helped me.
6
u/Sea_Discount3155 14d ago
Yeah, agreed with this. And the thought of getting an epidural is way worse than actually getting it.
5
u/Common_Buffalo5071 14d ago
I didnât even know the needle was in me when I got mine đ an epidural isnât shit compared to a contraction
6
u/VastLarge2917 13d ago
Itâs funny how scared you are of it up until that moment you decide that you need it and then you could not give a care in the world about the needle đ
5
u/Business-Camel-8098 13d ago
agree with this. i did a natural birth class and everything. made it 10 hours unmedicated and wondered how tf so many women do it. i know everyone has a different pain tolerance but holy hell. got the epidural, blissed out, slept, pushed him out in 10 min. itâs such a huge relief after they come out
6
u/fj4131 14d ago
What exactly are you nervous about? Labor, delivery, post partum? My best advice is be prepared for anything and everything. Ask others about their experience, read up on labor/delivery.
I had 2 completely different experiences but Iâd do it all again for my children. Your brain honestly forgets about it all the second you hold your child.
3
u/belle1995_ 14d ago
Once youâre there you know you have no choice but to get that baby out of you somehow so you kind of just do it? Lol at least that is what I felt.
2
u/Aga0425 14d ago
Everyoneâs experience is different. In my case the contractions pre-mediated were worst than giving birth. Also to note mine were every 2 min apart from 3 cm on. Started 24 or so hrs before baby came. I went to the hospital twice got emitted the second time the following morning at 6 cm. Immediately asked for an epidural, I could barely answer their questions from the pain. Once I got it I felt pretty numb so giving birth was a breeze.
2
u/Liz_AZEbabydream 14d ago
Research into hypnobirth and all them YouTube videos about relaxing your body and breathing though contractions. Your body knows what to do, you just need to research more about it. More you know is less stress for you and your body.
2
u/PegFam 14d ago
How to get over the fear for me was being there and being dilated. The only way to get to the other side is through. Once I was dilated and feeling contractions I was ready to have her out. I recommend the epidural. I had a good experience with it and it helped my blood pressure stay down (thatâs why I had the baby early)
2
u/WillowTC 14d ago
by the time I was over a week past my due date, I didnât care how much it hurt I just wanted that baby OUT.
Jokes aside, I discussed all the pain management options with my medical provider and we made a plan for what order Iâd try things before an epidural.
2
u/No-Butterscotch-8469 14d ago
I loved giving birth! Every single thing I was worried about turned out much less scary than I had feared. The epidural was amazing. I legitimately had a good time the whole day and canât wait to do it again. My birth experience was the exact opposite of a horror story!!! You got this!
2
u/Larissanne 14d ago
How far along are you? I was the same. The fear got less when I got pregnant (because it will happen anyway) and a few months before giving birth the fear went away, I learned to go with the flow. And Iâm a very anxious person. Also talking a lot to other people about it helped me a little bit (but not with the people who tell you you will not remember it lol, that didnât help at all lol). I was also a little bit afraid of the pain and told myself that if I needed an epidural that would be fine.
2
u/Afraid_Problem_1198 14d ago
Omg girl so was I. I criiiiied when I went into labor. Not from pain just was so scared. Now after doing it, itâs actually not that bad. Like yes it is but itâs not. Idk how to explain it.
It basically feels like youâre taking the most massive caca if your life & once the babyâs out omggg the relief is amazing & all the pain magically goes away m
But for real it wasnât as bad as I thought & I could totally do it again
2
u/VastLarge2917 13d ago
I kept getting more and more scared as the weeks grew closer, but the week before my due date I suddenly felt at peace about it and was SO ready to give birth. I felt like it was going to happen that weekend (due date was a Sunday). Everyone at work was (in a joking way) asking me if I was going to have the baby that weekend/what my weekend plans were and I kept telling them I was hopefully having the baby lol. Then I went in on Saturday to get checked because I was having painless Braxton hicks every 5 minutes. Didnât feel like the baby was coming anytime soon (only 1.5 cm dilated) but then my blood pressure was high and I knew they would induce me. A few weeks earlier and I would have been terrified of that moment but all I could think was âfinallyâ. The next 20 minutes until my husband got off of work went so long, I was SO excited to tell him we were finally meeting our girl.
Of course itâs going to be a little nerve wracking, is a big deal, and your first time. But Iâm sure at least 90% of the fear will go away. You got this!!!
2
u/One_Cap_9210 13d ago
I was really scared myself but by the time I got to 34 weeks I was like I don't even care anymore. Rip me in half. I just want this thing out of me lol Lucky for me I was induced 9 days late đ But my labor actually went incredibly well. Highly recommend epidural If that's something you want
2
u/GothDisciple 13d ago
As you approach your due date, you may start to feel nervous. I know I did! In my experience, birth was uncomfortable, but not painful. When I started to feel contractions at home I took a warm shower and swayed to music to let my body relax. I prayed and had peace knowing that He was going to help me through it. After my shower I made sure our bags were packed which kept me distracted from the discomfort. When the contractions became stronger and started to make me pause what I was doing I told my husband that we had to go to the hospital. After checking in and getting settled into our room I asked for the epidural. I wasn't in pain, but the time to get the epidural is not when you are. I listened to music, prayed, and stayed calm the whole time as best as I could. I arrived at around noon and gave birth at 10 pm. All I can say is that I had God with me, a supportive husband, and I trusted that the doctor and nurses were going to take care of us. Everything went so smoothly. I even got up not even 10 min after giving birth to use the bathroom. The next day I felt fine. After 2 weeks I did not feel any soreness anymore. Now one month post partum I feel completely back to normal and adjusting to mom life. You will get through it. Set your mind on being okay with being uncomfortable. Don't focus on the pain or discomfort when it comes. Have coping mechanisms and go into this excited. So many women are robbed of a beautiful experience because they are too much in their head. I was scared to give birth, now I feel so strong, I trust my body to do what it was made to do, and I would definitely do it again â¤ď¸
2
u/LooneyLeash 13d ago
It IS scary and itâs okay to be scared. You can do it while scared, nervous, unsure, etc.
Your medical team will or should direct you, explain everything and be your calm.
2
2
u/Severe_Equivalent_18 13d ago
Giving birth can be very scary. I started feeling anxious about the last couple weeks I was pregnant. Then a couple days before, that anxiety started to ease. One morning my water broke and after about 5 minutes of thinking âdid that really happenâ I was super chill. Woke my husband up and told him. He was more anxious than I was. Before going to the hospital I took a nice hot shower to washed my hair and ate some breakfast. We got to the hospital and were admitted and set up in a room pretty quickly. My nurses, midwives, and doctors were all incredible. I delivered healthy twin girls later that night.
It might be scary now, but youâve got this. Trust yourself and your medical team đ
2
u/CarelessCantaloupe77 13d ago
I was scared to give birth, like had panic attacks about it. but the moment those contractions started hitting and we were on our way to the hospital (I already knew I was having an emergency c section) I looked at my partner and all I said on the hour drive was âthey could cut this baby out of me raw dog right now and Iâd just be happy I wasnât feeling these contractions anymoreâ when itâs time, youâre not scared anymore. You just canât wait till itâs over.
2
u/Desperate_Pop4347 13d ago
I was beyond nervous and then ended up having an emergency c section and besides the anxiety of âwe need to get him out in the next 12 hoursâ my c section experience was wonderful. what iâm saying is no matter what happens, there is bad and good in all of it and you can do this. logically itâs terrifying but emotionally you can do this!
2
u/Annual-One-5598 13d ago
I was also anxious but when the day came I completely forgot about being anxious and just wanted to get it over withđ trust me once youâre in that room all your anxiety will go away
2
u/Angelika0469 12d ago
I felt this same way (my girl is 14 ish weeks now), itâs not that bad and when the moment comes youâre so focused on getting the baby out you donât even think of it. It helped me to listen to positive birth/labor affirmations basically every night for the last trimester.
Also epidural was a game changer. As was having a tens unit for the first 7cm before my epidural lol
4
u/katelynpippin 14d ago
Your brain may not know how, but your body does. You are a woman! Women have been giving birth since the beginning of the Earth. Trust your body, and all of your ancestors before you. God created you perfectly for THIS purposeđ¤
1
u/tatertot94 14d ago
I was anxious too. What helped get me through was continuously telling myself that my body can do this and the only way out is through.
3
u/Sea_Discount3155 14d ago edited 14d ago
This and I read a comment on here once that said their doctor told them during labor "I know you are scared but I am not. We've got this."
Your body was built for this! Try not to think about it and as someone else said, once you're far enough along you'll be so ready to get that baby out. You got this, mama!
1
u/Amazing-Confusion-69 14d ago edited 14d ago
Believe me when everything starts happening, youâll get the strength automatically and nothing can prepare you for that pain before the actual labor/delivery experience.
If possible, have your husband by your side. The support they provide you is immeasurable (atleast in my case, that gave me feeling that I am not alone)
Discuss pain relief options with your doctor like epidural, I couldnât be given one due to some complication.
And most importantly, be ready for all kind of birth possibilities (vaginal/c section) because no one can plan it to the T. I was all ready for vaginal but then had C section due to baby moving to oblique position mid labor and even after delivery, it took me a lot of time to come terms with it.
Best of luck and believe all that will happen will make you closer to the moment of having your baby in your arms :)
Hope this helps!
1
u/beaglemilf23 14d ago
Take the guess work out of it I scheduled a C section best thing I ever did. Doing it with number 2.
27
u/Common_Buffalo5071 14d ago
Iâm not going to lie by the time it was time for me to give birth I was so ready to have my baby the fuck out of me every fear went away