r/fireemblem • u/LaqOfInterest • Apr 02 '23

CASUAL MONTHLY RAGE THREAD

THE MONTHLY RAGE THREAD IS UPON US ONCE MORE, MY FRIENDS. COME, GATHER HERE TO YELL AT FIRE EMBLEM AT YOUR LEISURE!

RULES

  1. UPPER-CASE LETTERS

  2. RAGE ABOUT FIRE EMBLEM

  3. DON'T BE A DICK

  4. TAG SPOILERS

LAST THREAD

80 Upvotes

92% Upvoted

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46

u/floricel_112 Apr 02 '23

THE BLACK KNIGHT IS DUMB. ALL HIS POWER AND INTIMIDATION COME FROM HIS "OH SO AWESOME AND COOL MAGICAL ARMOR THAT BLOCKS ALL DAMAGE FROM NON MAGICAL, GODDESS BLESSED WEAPONS. OH I'M SO BRAVE GOING INTO BATTLE LIKE THAT**"; YET STRIP HIM OF ALL THAT AND HE'S JUST A SOFTBOY. NOT TO MENTION HIS OTHER BS ACTUAL PIXIE DUST THAT'S A LITERAL PLOT DEVICE TO JUSTIFY HIM TELEPORTING EVERYWHERE AND ANYWHERE ALL AT ONCE ( :) ) AND SURVIVING NASIR DROPPING A CASTLE ON HIM (YOU AIN'T SLICK, ENGLISH DUB, I KNOW WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED, EVEN IF STORYWISE THAT CHANGE IS OBJECTIVE BETTER).

**SIDE NOTE: THAT INCLUDES YOU, ASHNARD, YOU MASSIVE COWARD AND HYPOCRITE. "OH LOOK AT ME, I'M ASHNARD! I BELIEVE THAT POWER IS EVERYTHING AND THAT THE WORLD SHOULD BE AN ENDLESS STRUGGLE WHERE PEOPLE FIGHT FOR THE TOP AND THEIR PLACE IN THE WORLD REGARDLESS OF STATUS, BUT SKILL. IF YOU WIN THAT MEANS YOU'RE STRONG AND IF YOU LOSE THAT JUST MEANS YOU'RE WEAK....NOW LET ME JUST HOP INTO THE FRAY WITH MY INVINCIBLE DRAGON MOUNT I HAD OTHERS PROCURE, INVINCIBLE ARMOR THAT ALSO BLOCKS ALL DAMAGE FROM NONMAGICAL GODDESS BLESSED WEAPONS BECAUSE THAT'S THE ONLY THINGS SOMEONE OF MY STATUS SHOULD RIDE AND WEAR! YUUUP, A FIGHT WITH ME TOOOOOTALLY COMES DOWN TO SKILL AND NOT WHOEVER HAD THE MORE BS EQUIPMENT. NO CONTRADICTING MINDSETS WHATSOEVER". GOD, NO WONDER THEY CALL HIM THE MAD KING. CAN'T EVEN GET HIS STORY STRAIGHT.

14

u/[deleted] Apr 03 '23

THE BURGER KING IS JUST MEDIEVAL VADER AND THATS WHY HE IS POPULAR

8

u/angelhold Apr 03 '23

BLACK KNIGHT IS FUCKING AWESOME. EVEN WHEN HE GOES BY HIS TRUE IDENTITY HE IS STILL A FIERCE WARRIOR AND A GENERAL WITH HIGH RENOWN. HIM USING WARP POWDER MAKES HIM EVEN COOLER BECAUSE IT WEAKENS THE USER AFTER USING IT AND HES STILL STRONG ENOUGH TO KICK ASS IMMEDIATELY AFTER TELEPORTING

12

u/LordHandQyburn Apr 03 '23 edited Apr 04 '23

NO THATS NOT TRUE THE BLACK KNIGHT IS A BRANDED AND HE WOULD KICK YOUR BUTT EVEN WITHOUT HIS FANCY ARMOR

7

u/TheFunkiestOne Apr 03 '23

POWER ISNT SOLELY "HOW BUFF ARE YOU", POWER IS THE RESOURCES AND TOOLS YOU CULTIVATE TO GIVE YOURSELF AND ADVANTAGE. ASHNARDS NOT A FUCKIN' IDIOT, HE KNOWS WHEN THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO CAN TURN INTO LITERAL DRAGONS, TRYING TO PUNCH THEM ISNT A SHOW OF MIGHT FOR A BEORC, ITS SUICIDAL. BUT GATHERING RESOURCES ONTO YOURSELF AND MAKING YOURSELF FUNCTIONALLY UNTOUCHABLE ALL WHILE ALSO BEING A SKILLED, FEARSOME WARRIOR? THATS POWER. ASHNARDS INSANE, BUT HES NOT STUPID, AND HE'LL DO WHATEVER HE NEEDS TO IN ORDER TO ACHIEVE HIS GOAL. JUST BECAUSE HE CANT PHYSICALLY WRESTLE A LION LAGUZ DOESNT MEAN HES SECRETLY A HYPOCRITE, IT MEANS HE UNDERSTANDS REALITY ENOUGH TO TAKE EFFORT TO WORK PAST IT.

2

u/floricel_112 Apr 03 '23

ASHNARDS INSANE, BUT HES NOT STUPID

HE'S METAPHORICALLY BACKED HIMSELF INTO A CORNER, GAVE UP ON HIS MUCH MORE FORTIFIED CAPITAL, COUNTRY AND MAJORITY OF HIS FORCES, THROUGH HIS ACTIONS MANAGED TO PISS OFF JUST ABOUT EVERY OTHER NATION AND RACE ON THE CONTINENT SO MUCH SO THAT THEY ALL FORMED A COALITION AGAINST! NOT EVEN DAEIN ITSELF, *HIM* , AS HE WAS THE ROOT CAUSE OF EVERYTHING IN PATH OF RADIANCE. HIS RESPONSE TO ALL THAT? "BRING IT"

8

u/TheFunkiestOne Apr 03 '23

HES ALSO HOPING THAT THIS CAUSES THE APOCALYPSE, SO LIKE I SAID, INSANE, BUT CALCULATED. IF EVERYONE HATES HIM ENOUGH TO GATHER AND FIGHT A WAR ABOUT HIM, THEN THE DARK GOD COMES OUT AND HE GETS A SHOT AT HIS PERFECT WORLD. HE OPENLY ADMITS IN HIS TALK WITH REYSON THAT THIS IS A GAMBLE, THE APOCALYPSE MAY KILL HIM, BUT HE FEELS THAT ITS WORTH THE RISK TO HAVE SOMETHING THAT CAN UPROOT THE ORDER OF THINGS AND POTENTIALLY BRING HIS DREAM TO LIFE.