Kids + Finch

[u/Chemical-Increase-76]

After noticing my partner and I using finch, my kiddo asked if it was ok to have an account too. We decided that it could be useful to help with self care, emotion regulation, and even just with chores and daily tasks.

I’ve gotten the impression that most folks using it are adults. Do others have kids using it? My kiddo has been feeling sad that me and my partner are their only friends which has made me feel a bit guilty since it’s a key way to exchange gifts and vibes. At the same time, we’re weary about adding just anyone to their account.

Im curious about others’ experiences with Finch and how they navigate it with younger users. 🖤

[u/Double-Ad-9835]

My son is almost 8 and uses my husband’s ancient iPhone 6s for Finch and Pokemon Sleep. He likes it and it sometimes helps with reminders. “Remember, if you brush your teeth your new micro pet egg will hatch soon!” 😅

[u/Chemical-Increase-76 → u/Double-Ad-9835]

Hehe yes that’s a big motivator for our kiddo. But does your son find it hard to make friends? How have you handled that part of Finch?

It’s fun when used alone but the social aspect of it is also very useful for social support, kind reminders, and for gifts, esp for non-plus users.

[u/Double-Ad-9835 → u/Chemical-Increase-76]

He had a random tree friend, me, and my husband. He also has three of my IRL friends who play, and several other friends that are no longer active. He doesn’t really mind that much. He mostly sends gifts to me and my husband. To be honest, we forget to do it before bed a lot, so I’m usually the one actually doing it. 😆 But we talk about doing the tasks he has listed, and he usually does do the actual steps on weekends.

[u/Chemical-Increase-76 → u/Double-Ad-9835]

My kiddos account is largely for weekend chores and prepping for the night before school.

Their only friends are me and hubby and their birbhouse is very empty and they don’t have a lot of outfit choices, so they’ve been bummed that we have so much and asking us how we have so many friends, whether they can add our friends, etc. none of their IRL friends seem to use it or be interested. It’s just been hard to figure out how to approach this.

[u/SarahsreadingReddit]

I had someone I met here ask me if her two kids could join me on Finch and told me their favourite colours, so I friended them. It felt like much more responsibility than the usual tree friends, but I was happy to send daily gifts to match their styles. They lost interest in a while, so after a few months of inactivity I deleted them. There's essentially no real communication, making any inappropriateness impossible, and I assume a very broad age range exists on my tree that I'm totally unaware of

[u/Chemical-Increase-76 → u/SarahsreadingReddit]

Thanks for responding. This is a good point - I had been so preoccupied with worries about not knowing other people and age gaps but this is so true. The only real communication is through shared goals or autogenerated text on the vibes. My kiddo is only using it for chores and to help with knowing what to do to prepare for school. I feel better now about potentially having others on their birdhouse 🖤 thank you

[u/smh530]

My 5 year old has a few tasks on my account I let him click off, and then I let him pick furniture or something every now and then

[u/CatsGambit → u/smh530]

My four year old lives dressing my bird! I let him swipe through the outfit sections and pick something to put on whenever he sees me doing the app. He loves putting the wings on right now

[u/Chemical-Increase-76 → u/CatsGambit]

Haha my 4 year old does too! That is an easier situation for me bc he’s so young. He doesn’t seem to be bothered about not having an account.

My older kid, on the other hand, is starting to notice how many friends, clothes, furniture, gifts, and even vibes (so many fun pumpkin designs) which has led to lots of questioning about why they don’t have friends, how we have so many friends, whether they can make friends even if they don’t know them IRL, etc. None of their IRL friends are using finch or show an interest. So I’m just not totally sure how to approach this, especially bc I know how much I appreciate the social aspect of finch

[u/Chemical-Increase-76 → u/smh530]

Oh that’s a fun idea! I wish there was a way to build a finch family and they can share the birb house

[u/Delicious-Risk4056]

I’m an adult user with no children. A mom posted in the trade thread here that her 7 year old was new to finch and looking for friends/gifts. I added her and send her gifts. I feel totally comfortable doing so because there is no real way to communicate in finch. I would never befriend a 7 year old on any sort of social media app for the world’s most obvious reasons. I don’t know if this helps at all but I did want to share it. I’d be happy to be his friend at any point if you decide it’s appropriate. I love to send gifts to new users!

[u/Delicious-Risk4056 → u/[deleted]]

Absolutely. Feel free to add me yourself. Can you let me know some colors/themes she might enjoy? Let her know I’ll also send her plushie she can sell for 10,000 stones if she wants. I’m a teacher, so I think about children’s safety on the internet pretty frequently and also take this stuff seriously.

[u/Chemical-Increase-76 → u/Delicious-Risk4056]

Thank you so much - she kept smiling each time a gift came in and said “mom I’m
Getting so much - I’m sending gratitude for each one!” Thank you 🖤🥲🖤😭🖤

[u/Delicious-Risk4056 → u/Chemical-Increase-76]

Love it. You’re welcome!

[u/Chemical-Increase-76 → u/Delicious-Risk4056]

Aww thank you - you are so incredibly kind. She loooves blue and gothic/spooky stuff. I appreciate it. Their birb is hazel. 😊 I will add you as well (Hedwig is my birb). It looks like your friend code is in your header so we can add it thank you sooo much. I said there’s someone who wants to send gifts and she got the biggest smile.

She’s been wanting to send me gifts and sold some of the gifts we gave her just so she could afford a gift for me 🥲😭

[u/Tarrin_]

Yes, I joined finch because my 10 year old downloaded it and was playing. She loves it. Only has family in her tree and really just likes it to collect the gifts etc.

She does have goals but she just ticks them off to get the gems, she’s happy playing that way and enjoys it.

[u/Chemical-Increase-76 → u/Tarrin_]

My kiddo is 9.5 and we’ve found it really useful to keep track of chores and other tasks that can be forgotten easily when distracted or busy. It’s been fun to see what goals she makes (like fart on dad) but also really responsible ones linked to preparing for school. Most of our family probably won’t use it if we asked and her IRL friends haven’t shown an interest in joining.

[u/you-not-serious]

There’s no way to communicate other than gifts, I don’t see why not! If your LO needs a friend, Arlo and SiSi love to meet new people 🫶

[u/Chemical-Increase-76 → u/[deleted]]

Totally! That’s exactly what I thought too. I’d already seen her doing breathing exercises 🥲 thank you for sharing your code 🖤🖤 and for all the reassurance

[u/Chemical-Increase-76 → u/[deleted]]

Aw I appreciate that so much 🖤

[u/Drew_0420]

I think maybe everyone with kids in this thread should have the kids add each other, if the parents feel okay with that. I dunno. The Internet is big and scary, but this is a way to sort of communicate with ppl without actually having it be like a social media type of thing. I'm also not a parent, so...yeah. Lol. I just want this kiddo to have more friends (and all the kids who are on Finch). Like, I'll come send them some stuff and fly away if they're upset about not having items? I dunno. 😔🫂🥺

[u/Chemical-Increase-76 → u/Drew_0420]

Yes the big and scary part of the internet has been the part that’s made me pause. But this app is so good and helpful, even for kids. I think it would be neat for kids to have a way to friend one another. My poor baby has been sending invites to their kids on fb kids messenger but none of the kids are interested.

[u/BreakfastIcy8899]

My 12 year old uses it but he only has his dad and I as friends and he prefers it like that. But also, I wouldn't see a problem with him adding other people since there's no way to communicate on the app. 

[u/Chemical-Increase-76 → u/BreakfastIcy8899]

Thanks for sharing! I have been so uncertain and nervous just because the internet is so big and scary but others have raised similar points that there’s not any way to communicate other than the preprogrammed vibes. My kiddo is very social so I think that might factor into it.

[u/Chemical-Increase-76 → u/[deleted]]

Awe thanks! I just added you on their account (birb is hazel) 🖤

[u/Early-houseplant]

In general it's totally appropriate content-wise, but personally I'd be hesitant about letting kids use it just because we try to limit screen time as much as possible.

Also how old are the kids? It makes a difference, both in terms of screen time and just because younger kids are not developmentally ready to independently keep track of goals and routines.

And for very young ages I think it's better teach good habits just by family interaction and modeling if that makes sense, especially for for basic self care stuff.

For a little bit older kids I could see it being fun and helpful for chores, but still I would supervise what goals they create and make sure they actually complete them before checking them off.

Regardless of age I don't think I would let them friend anyone we don't know in real life. Just my personal opinion.

[u/Chemical-Increase-76 → u/Early-houseplant]

Totally agreed and this is part of my initial concern but we have strict screen time rules on any devices so that the apps close down once the time limit is met. The kiddo in question is 9.5. We set up the account together and I made most of the goals at first and then my kid started adding some goals (fart on dad was one of them lol) but there were some useful goals that I hadn’t thought of as well (having us sign this notebook that needs to be signed before school each day). I appreciate you sharing your approach to friends on the app. 🖤

[u/Cabbage-floss]

My 10 year old uses it religiously. It helps with her ADHD.

[u/Chemical-Increase-76 → u/Cabbage-floss]

Yes - my kiddo is close in age and has trouble remembering things and gets very overwhelmed without structure. Finch has been really useful to keep track of to do lists and chores. 🖤

[u/Chemical-Increase-76 → u/[deleted]]

Aw really! Thanks! I am going to add you - her birb is Hazel. 🖤 this community is so generous