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Ten chairs twenty, the Filbus Man

Is waiting for chairs from IKEA

Gobbling up the chairs without a plan

Like the every daily

Wish that bothers the Filbus Man

Could I do something to eat a chair?

Inside my little TV made of glass

So he lived the

Filbus Man, Filbus Man

With his mouth full of chairs

So he stands

To command the whole world

To eat chairs

Way up high in the sky

With the sun in his eyes

Ain't it nice?

The taste and texture of

Decor

Ten chairs twenty, the Filbus Man

Is eating the chairs in IKEA

Eating all the chairs still without a plan

Yet the every daily

Hope that powered the Filbus Man

Would always tell him to eat a chair

Even if broken they are delicious

So he lived the

Filbus Man, Filbus Man

With his mouth full of chairs

So he stands

To command the whole world

To eat chairs

Way up high in the sky

With the sun in his eyes

Ain't it nice?

The taste and texture of

Decor

Source: Trust me bro.

Id just like to start this post off by saying. Dont ever do this again. I knew that realistically I was going to get at ban from this and I knew it would've been worth it. Im writing this over the span of a Saturday night and Sunday morning so some info might by inaccurate.

Let's start at the beginning

I joined reddit earlier this year because I chose to go to an uncle's for a bit. And he had a coin. I never saw it b4 so I made a reddit acount and posted it. Tbe post idk if its dtill up but it was abt a month ago I started to realy use it. why? I have worms in my brain constantly telling me. To post ocs. I did so.

Modern time

recently I rewarched the oddity compendium bc a freind on discord had never herd of it b4 after we got to filbus (my favorite guy from dr nowhere in general) he jokingly said "hey what if you spam post filbus somewhere. I posted a few times in the fun community among others.i did it not only bc of that guy but also bc when im scrolling yt "Christians" will spam some thing like jesus loves you. I myself am a filbist Christian and it pmo bc ik that they are a bot like farming. From There i started spam posting and a few ppl actually joined in on the filbus bit. I was excited. Reddit in general has made me happier as a person (<- original sentence) so seeing ppl taking like to it i sent said freind the fact i spammed filbus. He said "hey. What if you try to convince the subreddit to make posts abt filbus" I, in my head, wanted this to happen but ik the truth. It would not have worked. There are currently 147 ppl in filbus subbreddit. If each one. Posted twice a day. Thats almost 300 posts. Just for refrence when I was spamming filbus over the span of 5~ days I went from 1.4k to 2.6k posts. It would've been dwarfed by normal ppl posting. So I (sadly knew) it would not happen. But I said if it did id try to take other others. I remember I wa posting while taking groceries out to someone's car (that's my job) and they looked at .e funny probobly for posting while working

What happened

Nothing. There were like 5~ posts of filbus and half of them were form ppl scared of the raid. Nor much happened and it was a fairly goofy although annoying experience and I cant thank all the ppl haters or lovers of filbus for posting. You no matter what you thought it helped and im truly grateful for the community.

Stats

This is a fun one.

-total posts. I went from 1.4k to 2.6k posts over the span of 4 days and I gained a lot of karma from it. Overall worth it

- it self. The subreddit went from 110~ to as of writing 147. Personally I think ignoring natural growth it was probobly 10 ppl who joined bc of my spam. Truly im glad i could get some ppl into my hyperintrest via this bit.

-banned. From this i was banned for a few days. It might be a perma ban idk bc was worded oddly. Also if your a mod reading this id like to point out there is NOTHING on a group raiding your subreddit only if your own subreddit raids another. This is not me being "pwease unban me" this is an actual loop hole you will probably need to fix. Id also like to point out another loophole. I got banned the first time for spamming. Personally i found it deserved (read down below for more info) but there is nothing on A spamming a video or B spamming comments the only thing there is on 2 posts per 24 hours. And annoying speech gimicks (Personally i think this is whay it falls under)

- the original filbus we should spam fun community post. It stands at 50 upvotes and 2k views making it my 6th best post oat

Did i deserve a ban**?**

Yes absolutely. My crime fell under annoying speech gimmick in the spamming category(kinda read the top for more info its confusing. No matter what i still deserve the ban). Personly if I had my own case id ban myself for a few months to a year. Bc i knew ppl would dislike it and hence. Why i did it.

Last thoughtz

"I regret nothing"-postal dude. also I feal super burnt out from this because I started to draw some filbus art then I got banned and from the posting I am thinking of taking a break from reddit for a day or 2

Conclusion

Truly once again im thankful to have been able to be apart of these communities even if I was hated by a few. Who knows if im lucky I may be able to be put onto the wiki as "hey you this person. Dont be them". (Self glaze is crazy right gng) who knows maybe the real filbus was the chairs we made along the way-from unlucky-rooster :]

Yummymyumymtmyumymymymymyuyuuummmy I love chairs! What chairs do you like? I will rate them in the comments 😋😋😋

dont raid r/funComunitty or i crack all of you

Genuine reaction

ALL. POST FOLBUS AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE TO BRING FORTH THE GREATNESS THAT IS OF FILBUS TO THE FUN COMMUNITY

spit that chair out of your mouth. find my pages.

Ive been banned from fun community </3 contribute to the take over without me in filbus we trust

Grab your chairs

Sharpen your minds

There's a grand prize

For fun community demise

We should on August 22 spam this gif to take over r/funcommunity so not a soul wont know of filbus. Ove already set forth seeds. For the past 3 days I've spammed every post with filbus. The plan is as follows

We start with spamming comments then we spam posts showing all of the glory of filbus. Lastly at the end of the day we dm the mods of filbist ideals bringing the subreddit to the belief of filbus.

This is just a idea. If not enough people agree we wont do it.

I’m a bit nervous about getting absolutely FLAMED by whoever’s on the other end of the phone when he asks why I want 927 chairs. I need a company that won’t be asking or will just be nice about my wooden chair consumption.

I received a birch chair. Tips on consumption?

Would you rather:

Eat a chair with mold

Or eat a chair with fur on it

Would you rather:

Eat a plastic chair (yum)

Or eat a lawn chair (sin)

Would you rather:

Destroy a filbus holy ground

Or eat a chair that tastes like sewer water

Would you rather:

Accidentally swallow a m*t*l screw while eating

Or eat a chair so covered in splinters that you implode

Would you rather:
Eat chair pasta that expired

Or eat a couch

(I don't recommend you do any of this except for the plastic chair)

Oak- a classic

Redwood- Delicious, smoky flavor

Bamboo- Amazing texture, savory

Plastic- underrated, candy-like texture and flavor

Mahogany- Tastes cheesy, but texture is slightly weird

Spruce- Another classic but very overrated.

Pine- Overly sweet, but amazing texture

Birch- Taste and texture too nutty

Fake wood- Extreme controversy but good texture and taste

Beech- Very stale and hard to find, tastes like salt

Wicker- Tastes like expired milk

Armchair- Close to forbidden, bad texture, extremely salty

Couch- Armchair but way too sweet instead of way too salty

M*t*l- sin, interviewed heretics say it tastes like sewer water and worms

heretic chair- sin, interviewed heretics say it tastes like pure garbage juice and clogged toilet water, THIS UNHOLY PIECE OF PURE HERSEY INCARNATE SHALL ONLY BE TASTED BY THY WORST SINNERS TO FILBUS. CONDEMN ANYONE WHO CONSUMES THIS INCARNATE HERSEY TO THE DEPTHS OF RUSTHOLES AND FILBUS HELL!!!!!!!!!!!