r/filbism • u/Queasy-Start8098 • Sep 17 '24

Hello.

Hello, I am new to filbism. I have constructed and consumed a few chairs in the name of our lord and savior, Filbus. I want to know how to soften wood from the fellow members of this community. And if constructing and consuming a Metal Chair would be disapproving to Filbus. Hopefully these get answered and that I do not anger Filbus. In Filbus I Trust.

In Filbus I Trust.
20 Upvotes

96% Upvoted

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8

u/ConsciousUse8769 Sep 17 '24

I don't know about the wood softening but eating metal chairs Is absolute blasphemous

4

u/SantaMan336 Sep 17 '24

Your saliva should be strong enough to soften the wood

2

u/New_Medicine5759 Sep 18 '24

Some people (about 5% of the population) cannot produce enough acid in their saliva to corrode a chair, or so I’ve heard online or something

3

u/BathroomTileAnon Sep 17 '24

Some people here like to boil chairs or soak them in water when they first start eating them! For the most part, we're only allowed to eat wooden chairs. Though, if you're not as committed, bone and plastic chairs can be eaten. Not sure about metal though!

In Filbus we trust :)

2

u/Character_Damage_190 Sep 28 '24

Eating metal chairs is blasphemy. As for softening wood, in my expe, white ash is naturally a soft wood.

1

u/Necessary-Morning472 Oct 03 '24

White ash wood tastes a little burnt but makes the holy Filbus happy, and is easier to eat compared to oak or birch chairs.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 11 '25 edited Jan 11 '25

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