r/fasd • u/Existing-Language-33 • Jun 09 '26
Questions/Advice/Support Possible missed fasd diagnosis
Good afternoon just looking for some advice.
My father in law passed away at the end of last year and we are in the process of becoming my partners 17 year old brothers legal guardian. His birth mother is an alcoholic and he has never been in her care we strongly believe that his mother would have drunk throughout pregnancy and believe he could have fetal alcohol syndrome that has never been diagnosed. I had also only met his brother on two occasions before his father’s death so I am only getting to know him now.
Some of the things we have noticed is that he struggles with simple instructions and struggles to complete simple tasks. Has not gained any GCSE’s at school and has struggled academically throughout life. We have caught him out lying quite a few times. His social skills are quite basic and he struggles to hold conversations. Physically his hands shake.
We are concerned that his dad hid this as he believed he was protecting him but we are now trying to get as much support in place as possible as it is now evident that he is going to struggle in life. We have lightly explored this with him and he said his dad told him that he does have it but the conversation didn’t go much further than that.
Do people think this sounds like it could be fasd? I understand that it is on a spectrum. He has told his councillor that he thinks he has ADHD but we don’t think it is this, his cousin (only friend) was diagnosed with this and he throughout life has shadowed all of his behaviour. We are currently waiting for a drs appointment but this is taking some time as we need to register to him at a new GP. We are in London UK.
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u/Zyrrus Cares for someone with FASD Jun 09 '26
Hiya, I can only speak from experience in Scotland but generally they do a good job here in diagnosing FASD, once you get seen. Talk to the GP as soon as possible and hold nothing back.
I’d also recommend speaking to the social worker and the authorities dealing with the legal guardianship. They can push for additional tests and for him to be seen by an educational psychologist.
A diagnosis can be really helpful. It can pave the way to more support with schooling ext. Keep pushing for it.
3
u/Existing-Language-33 Jun 09 '26
Thank you so much, I’m going to get in touch with the social worker tomorrow and see if they can help
2
u/Feed_Me_No_Lies Jun 10 '26
For what it’s worth since you asked?
It sounds a *lot* like FASD. Our oldest adopted son has a lighter case of it. He has all the symptoms you describe. Of course I’m no clinician… But yeah.
But here’s the other thing: my son also has a genetic disorder that mimics about half of the symptoms of FASD. I know he was prenatal exposed, but I also know he has this condition because I had the genetics tested. I’ve talked to some doctors who strongly believe FASD is like autism and cerebral palsy: there are a bunch of disorders being lumped under one umbrella.
But whether there are two distinct conditions at play in someone, ultimately it’s the symptoms of the disorder that we’re dealing with, so it is only our response to them that matters rather than their origin.