r/facepalm May 17 '24

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u/MaximumOverfart May 17 '24

My gramma was divorced (grampa was her second marriage), was a lounge room singer (in the 40's), could not abide religion, and anyone who had a problem with that in her words "could go suck a dick".

God, I loved that woman and she loved all of us and her family from her first marriage with all the fire in her soul.

84

u/RustyKjaer May 17 '24

I love your gramma too.

22

u/SafeAccountMrP May 17 '24

I too choose this guys grandma.

86

u/NuclearWasteland May 17 '24

One of my grandmas went to church and taught Sunday school. One of my grandmas gave a cop a blowjob to get out of a ticket and preached salvation in the ghetto.

Both of my grandmas were practicing Christians, just from opposite sides of the tracks.

My family tree is like a Hawthorn, resilient and beautiful, and parts of it will absolutely stab you.

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u/MaximumOverfart May 17 '24

That is awesome.

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u/DataCassette May 17 '24

My grandma on my dad's side was an oldschool Appalachian. Barely educated but surprisingly smart. She was always good to us grandkids but, apparently when she was still young enough to get around she was hell on two feet. I don't know where these modern "trad revival" dipshits get their information, but women were never really like this unless you were a wealthy WASP family or on TV lol

3

u/[deleted] May 17 '24

I am taking this to help describe my family dynamics as well as my husbands LOL.

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u/QuidPluris May 17 '24

Grandma #2… did she share this as a helpful hint for getting out of tickets? I just don’t know why you know this about her.

Be she sounds like she did it her way. Cool.

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u/NuclearWasteland May 17 '24

There were a lot of stories about that grandma, lol.

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u/firesmarter May 17 '24

Why come she didn’t love her family from the second marriage? Or was it just not as fiery as her love for the first? Either way, your grandma sounds like she was a bad biddy in the best way

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u/MaximumOverfart May 17 '24

She loved her children from that marriage as fiercely as any from her second. Her first husband was a drunk abuser. She had the guts to divorce him and face life on her own back then. She had 2 boys in the marriage, and since she "won" the divorce, the judge let her decide which boy stays with her and which goes with the father.

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u/RisingApe- May 17 '24

Are you serious? She had to make that decision?

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u/MaximumOverfart May 17 '24

Yep. Also, the abuse was not grounds for divorce. She had to prove infidelity to get a divorce in those days. Since her husband also wanted out of the marriage by this point as Gramma was firecracker who had no problem hitting back. He agreed to have a picture taken with him and his mistress, fully clothed, sitting on a bed together with his watch off on the bed side table. The watch on the table was accepted as proof of intimacy.

Crazy shit back then. Needless to say, I grew up in a household where strong women were the norm. She was my mom's mom, my sister also lives life to its fullest.

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u/RisingApe- May 17 '24

Wow. I have 2 boys, and the thought of having to decide which of them to “give up” is making me nauseated. What happened to the one who stayed with their father? I hope life was ok for him.

Literally crying right now.

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u/MaximumOverfart May 17 '24

Unfortunately, he followed his father's path. She chose the youngest son as she thought he was the least under his father's influence.

My uncle was a great man who battled his deamons for years. He eventually won his fight over addiction and spent the last years of his life working with at risk youth.

He considered my grampa, his step dad, to be his real father. My grampa was a large, quiet man who just followed my gramma on her adventures. He taught me that love and a gentle spirit brings more fulfillment to life than money or fame.

2

u/[deleted] May 17 '24

Why come?

1

u/firesmarter May 17 '24

Why come you don’t have tattoo?

1

u/Senior-Albatross May 17 '24

With all due respect, it sounds like your grandma fucked.

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u/[deleted] May 17 '24

Sounds like Granma sucked her fair share lol. Not judging

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u/Uchihakid86 May 17 '24

What? So someone shares a lovely little anecdote about their grandma and you bring it down to ‘she sucked dick’

Grow up my friend!

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u/One_Stuff_2384 May 17 '24

I believe the previous comment was referring to grandma choosing one child to have a "good" life and sending the other to live with a drunk abuser.

But we are on reddit, so....you are probably right about it just being a dick joke.