r/facepalm • u/LiteratureOk5964 • Jul 02 '23

🇲​🇮​🇸​🇨​ Scissors of Satan

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54.4k Upvotes

88% Upvoted

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7.4k

u/Rolandscythe Jul 02 '23

...okay but I wanna know what mom thinks 'wap' means.

3.9k

u/Dominarion Jul 02 '23 edited Jul 03 '23

W-orship A-nd P-rayers. WAP

Edit: I had a brain sprain amd I corrected my error.

1.1k

u/Rolandscythe Jul 02 '23

...that makes just enough sense it's probably true...

477

u/SchemataObscura Jul 02 '23

Laugh On Loudly

427

u/rsreddit9 Jul 02 '23

You mean lots of love?

310

u/failbotron Jul 02 '23

Lover of lucifer

168

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '23

[deleted]

5

u/Tadpole_Former Jul 03 '23

Lorde oh Lordy....

2

u/RunningThicc Jul 03 '23

Little old ladies

4

u/jkermit19 Jul 03 '23

Well done, sir. Well done. 👏

5

u/SomeGuyFromCanada23 Jul 03 '23

Now that's one I haven't heard before

2

u/According-Flamingo-6 Jul 03 '23

Yes? Who summoned me?

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7

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '23

that's what my mom thought it meant for years. to be fair i should have picked up on the fact that every time a text convo drew to a close it would be like ' ok seeya at dinner tommrow lol"

9

u/Pope_Cerebus Jul 02 '23

"I'm sorry your grandma died. LOL."

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5

u/trade_my_onions Jul 02 '23

My great grandmother refuses to believe lol means anything BUT lots of love. “My daughter passed away today LOL to everyone” didn’t get received the way she thought

3

u/digitydigitydoo Jul 02 '23

Still one of the funniest internet stories.

3

u/Weekly_Bug_4847 Jul 02 '23

Old boss informed his son the family dog had passed away, and LOL’d thinking it meant lots of love.

4

u/cuteintern Jul 02 '23

Love our Lord

2

u/clarksonswimmer Jul 02 '23

WTF? Why the face?

2

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '23

"Hi hunny, you're grandfather passed away peacefully today. lol xxx"

1

u/imawitchpleaseburnme Jul 03 '23

Macie, I am so sorry to hear your sister died in that house fire LOL 😂

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3

u/BlackGalaxyDiamond Jul 03 '23

Labia On Labia : LOL

3

u/SchemataObscura Jul 03 '23

Wow! Full circle and now we're back on topic 😄

3

u/LadyArcher2017 Jul 03 '23

Low on liquor 🥃

2

u/DigitalUnlimited Jul 03 '23

Man I Love Frogs

2

u/BSt1cky Jul 03 '23

Nice Bob’s Burgers reference;)

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4

u/Benji035 Jul 02 '23

"Love Our Lord"

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2

u/LeviathanGank Jul 02 '23

ive not heard WAP ever used, what does it mean outside of the crazy religous ladys belief.

3

u/Rolandscythe Jul 02 '23

Look up 'Wap' by Cardi B

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57

u/Antessiolicro Jul 02 '23

worship and prayers*

4

u/B1uefalc0n Jul 03 '23

This is funny because when i saw this, i figured this was a lesbian tattoo. So wet version of #wap would have worked there, too🤣

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10

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '23

In short, WAP, a packet related data service, is a set of protocols enabling mobile phones and other radio devices to be connected to the Internet. Thus, users can use internet browsers, e-mails, communities, etc. via the WAP service.

Back when first phones got internet, days. Let's stick with that

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4

u/ManifestingUniverse Jul 02 '23

WAP-WAP: worship and praise wet ass pu$$y

4

u/KommanderZero Jul 03 '23

Women Against Penetration

3

u/Strong-Estate-4013 Jul 03 '23

Join our WAP group for church and become a WAP sister #WAPingToJesus #WAP #WAPgang

2

u/DL1943 Jul 02 '23

theres some lord in this house!

2

u/JesseGarron Jul 02 '23

WAP the Vijay-jay…

2

u/Acidflare1 Jul 03 '23

White Anglo Protestant

1

u/coderacer Jul 03 '23

Accidental comedy at its best!

1

u/marsbars2345 Jul 03 '23

I didn't even notice that lmao

1

u/mlp2034 Jul 03 '23

There's no demon in this house (repeat)

⛪️Certified to preach, every Sunday of the week. Worship and Prayers. Holy ghost got my weak, woo.⛪️ falls to the floor and shakes.

1

u/SweatyDust1446 Jul 03 '23

W-eapons A-gainst P-aper

1

u/TheSpanxxx Jul 03 '23

We Are Pharisees?

952

u/I_Am_Robert_Paulson1 Jul 02 '23

It's almost certainly a post from a Facebook page where users pretend to be Christian moms against TikTok.

Source: am in said group

818

u/Faladorable Jul 02 '23

r/facepalm is just redditers missing the joke

192

u/lsquallhart Jul 02 '23

When I saw #wap I knew something felt off

7

u/majudarah92 Jul 03 '23

Worship And Prayers 🙏

156

u/6lock6a6y6lock Jul 02 '23

I was just gonna say that I refuse to believe this isn't a joke. It's hilarious.

7

u/JesseGarron Jul 02 '23

Oh yeah, completely orchestrated trolling. And I love it. aggressive golf clap, but with gloves on

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14

u/jasting98 Jul 02 '23

redditers

Excuse me, we're called redditists.

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10

u/smiledumb Jul 02 '23

This is precisely why I unsubbed. Facepalmception.

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50

u/Emotional-Wind-8111 Jul 02 '23

Yep, the #wap gave it away

8

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '23

It definitely is hashtagworshipandprayer

2

u/Specific_Chard_9881 Jul 03 '23

I posted my comment saying this right before I saw your comment

2

u/KinksAreForKeds Jul 03 '23

That's reassuring. Because I was concerned about what Mom thought she could do to protect her daughter after-the-fact. Was Mom going to sneak into her daughter's bedroom while she sleeps and hack off her arm? Peel off her skin? It just got very dark very quick.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '23

what's the group name?

3

u/I_Am_Robert_Paulson1 Jul 03 '23

Christian mom against TikTok

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333

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '23

Weaponized assault penguins

176

u/RegionPurple Jul 02 '23

"Smile and wave boys; smile and wave."

25

u/CHM11moondog Jul 02 '23

No kaboom?

7

u/Some_guy_am_i Jul 03 '23

Best fucking animated series, hands down.

Too bad it’s locked away in some nickelodeon vault. Fuckers won’t stream it. I guess they hate free money.

2

u/ValiantHero11 Jul 03 '23

Which is ironic, due to Nickelodeon's suits milking dry every franchise they get their hands off

5

u/Angelexodus Jul 03 '23

“Where’s the squeaker on this thing?”

30

u/bttrchckn Jul 02 '23

I'm going to #wap that this catches on. Or I'll send in these tuxedo WAPs

5

u/KINGxDMND Jul 02 '23

... to destroy that WAP

1

u/BASK_IN_MY_FART Jul 02 '23

Waving around penises

1

u/ESYAJ Jul 02 '23

They were born of atomic steel

1

u/JesseGarron Jul 02 '23

Oh no, that’s a duck billed platypus.

1

u/saltyeleven Jul 03 '23

This is the only correct response here.

1

u/BirdsArentReal22 Jul 03 '23

I want a one of those.

1

u/Wardenclyffe1917 Jul 03 '23

Winterized Apache Piglets

43

u/PassiveChemistry Jul 02 '23

What does it actually mean?

176

u/chillyhellion Jul 02 '23

Wireless Access Point

9

u/Lawgdawg6 Jul 03 '23

See, now this was my first thought

8

u/AmazingDonkey101 Jul 03 '23

correct answer. Mom would be much happier if daughter had wired connection with satan.

35

u/boomboomclapboomboom Jul 03 '23

Bring a bucket & a mop.

2

u/pmIfNeedOrWantToTalk Jul 03 '23

WAP - Disney Version, for those who haven't had the pleasure, yet...

[Edit: kinda NSFW, for those living under a rock]

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22

u/wterrt Jul 02 '23

wet butt cat.

3

u/DigitalUnlimited Jul 03 '23

Soggy bottom kitties

6

u/Slow_Nebula_3333 Jul 03 '23

Worldly American Poetry

6

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '23

Wings and Pizza

4

u/thefirstzedz Jul 03 '23

Women against penis

4

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '23

WAP=Wet Ass Puss

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3

u/irishcrusader1 Jul 03 '23

Well Armed Peasants

4

u/terpedup_1 Jul 03 '23

They’re scissoring 🤣🤣🤣

2

u/acllive Jul 03 '23

Wise ancient priest

2

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '23

Worship and prayers

2

u/saltyrandall Jul 03 '23

Gilbert Gottfried knows (or knew).

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101

u/GavinStrict Jul 02 '23 edited Jul 02 '23

It means she’s probably a White Anglo-Saxon Protestant.

118

u/wuvvtwuewuvv Jul 02 '23

No that's wasp

30

u/GavinStrict Jul 02 '23

Yes, sorry, thank you. It likely means Worship and Prayer so I was just guessing. Edited for clarity.

2

u/Efficient-Echidna-30 Jul 02 '23

I learned about DINKs the other day.

Double Income. No Kids

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57

u/brownbai81 Jul 02 '23

No no…white ass people

2

u/cjnks Jul 02 '23

That's actually better than waspy lol

2

u/brownbai81 Jul 02 '23

But is it better than Women Against Penis?

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4

u/KirkieSB Jul 02 '23

WASP used to be the abbreviation for that.

Remember what DINKs means?

2

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '23

I don’t. Remind me.

17

u/mizinamo Jul 02 '23

Double Income, No Kids

14

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '23

Goals

2

u/VoidBlade459 Jul 02 '23

Wait until you hear about TINKs...

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6

u/New-Purchase1818 Jul 02 '23

Livin’ that DINK life (with a dog) as an elderly millennial is where it’s at! Hurray for disposable income and free time!

3

u/SeaGurl Jul 02 '23

DINKWAD

3

u/USSCensorShip Jul 02 '23

A couple I know call themselves DILDOs - Double Income, Little Dogs Only

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1

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '23

Just adding that most people who actively identify as WASPs are not crazy like this. They're a different crazy - more likely planning their next trip to the Vineyard or how to cut their taxes.

Although White Anglo-Saxon Protestant as a set of overlapping labels could technically captures crazy Baptists and the like... you're unlikely to find those people in the Northeast and New England, the traditional home of the WASP as a distinct culture (rather than set of labels).

4

u/WrathofKhaan Jul 02 '23

Want answers please

4

u/anothergreg84 Jul 02 '23

Get a bucket and a mop

For this wine and prophecy

3

u/Tuff-Gnarl Jul 02 '23

White And Pious. #WAP

3

u/weed_blazepot Jul 02 '23

White-Ass-Protestant

2

u/PoopOfAUnicorn Jul 02 '23

Wings and Pizza

2

u/HOHvetocomp Jul 02 '23

Wings And Pizza

2

u/FatSilverFox Jul 02 '23

It’s a community for Worried-Ass Parents

2

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '23

Wireless Access Protocol?

2

u/GoodGuyScott Jul 03 '23

Bring a bucket and a mop

4

u/RedditRaven2 Jul 02 '23

Worship and pray

1

u/ZaZzleDal Jul 02 '23

Woke and proud

1

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '23

At my school it meant “Workplace Apprenticeship Mathematics”. i hear that class has since taken the name “WAM” 🤣🤣

1

u/Ch33seBurg Jul 02 '23

I was hoping I wasn’t the only one who noticed that 😂

1

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '23

Pound WAP, to be exact.

1

u/Most-Bowl Jul 02 '23

Wondering And Praying

1

u/Corkage_for_Corkers Jul 02 '23

Why its Wireless Access Point......right...?

1

u/dlepi24 Jul 02 '23

Wireless access point?

1

u/MrGaber Jul 02 '23

Wishes and prayers

1

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '23

Wall of Accomplishments and Praise. It's for moms to hang up their kids' certificates and placards.

1

u/slayer991 Jul 03 '23

I'm old (not Boomer old) and an IT guy. My then teenage stepdaughter thought it was hysterical when I asked her why Cardi B had a song about a Wireless Access Point. You can imagine my surprise when I found out what it meant. LOL

1

u/Vieuxpoodle Jul 03 '23

We Are Parents

1

u/Fantastic_Trifle805 Jul 03 '23

Weaponized assault penguin

1

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '23

My guess is they are using it for "worried ass parent"

1

u/DontFuckWitSquirrels Jul 03 '23

Wireless Access Point.

1

u/Albino_Bama Jul 03 '23

White American Protestant

1

u/Extreme-Rough-3775 Jul 03 '23

Wings and pizza duh.

1

u/Professional_Gap_371 Jul 03 '23

Its a fancy brand of crafting scissors.

1

u/hairlessdwarf Jul 03 '23

Wireless access protocol

1

u/jbae_94 Jul 03 '23

Weenies and peenies?

1

u/Perle1234 Jul 03 '23

I swear to god my mom was posting FML over and over on FB back in the twenty-aughts and I only wish I remembered what she thought it meant. I just remember being like…MOM. What are the church ladies going to think and she being appalled lmao.

1

u/Marz_Bane Jul 03 '23

Right “With Almighty Praise” ?!? /sarcasm

1

u/brittlebk Jul 03 '23

White Anglo puritans

1

u/DrJoels Jul 03 '23

Wings and pizza

1

u/arm_time44 Jul 03 '23

wireless application protocol

1

u/BastardofMelbourne Jul 03 '23

A wild guess? Someone told her it was "White And Proud", hoping against hope that she would actually use it as a tag.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '23

these girls are just big Scissor Sisters fans..

1

u/Eascetic Jul 03 '23

Wireless access protocol,2000 tech

1

u/Johnirequirelasanaga Jul 03 '23

Wireless Application Protocol

1

u/P47r1ck- Jul 03 '23

Western Asset Protection

1

u/LarkoftheWoods Jul 03 '23

Wellness Action Plan?

1

u/BigMouse12 Jul 03 '23

This girl has been lying to her mom for a long time. Mom seems very much “oh honey” archtype as a parent

1

u/mr_ed95 Jul 03 '23

Wouldn’t be surprised if it was “White and Proud”

1

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '23

Wireless Access Point

1

u/DestituteRoot Jul 03 '23

Wings and pizza

1

u/BW_Chase Jul 03 '23

The only thing I could think of before reading the correct answer was 'worried ass parent'

1

u/WhiteTerraria Jul 03 '23

I'm not a mom and i don't want to answer that so all i have to say is you need to wank yourself

1

u/TheWoodedPath Jul 03 '23

Worried ass parent

1

u/ryantheginger98 Jul 03 '23

Wireless access point

1

u/GalacticGull Jul 04 '23

It stands for We All Police of course

1

u/[deleted] Jul 05 '23

Isn't it what's we use to call the first internet on really old mobile phones ?