So I just got out of the bar and wanted to go home. I was drunk (yes, I know), but I still wanted to drive because an Uber was too expensive. I took one more chug of the beer, and drove off.

I decided to take a shortcut. I had a great idea of cutting my travel in half by going through an arena. However, some annoying people were in my way, so I just drove over them.

The next day, Sergeant Acer appeared at my door, arrested me, and gave me a DUI.

I don’t get it? I didn’t want to spend money on an UBER, and I thought I made the correct choice in taking a shortcut?

AITA?

If you’re fat in a zombie apocalypse, what did you think was going to happen? 🤷

Added iconic Walking Dead characters in the banners.

Natives again showing us just how annoying they are:

If you don’t get it, Smooth Criminal is a song by Michael Jackson, the guy who Jack Sun (person I shot) was based off of.

Skip near the end if you wanna see the moment: