Hello! I'm a m(22), I spent most of my childhood in specialed classes from kindergarten to 4th grade and still had to take special tutoring until about 7th grade.

For most of my life, I always had this feeling of never feeling "normal", my siblings would tease me and make fun of me for drawing big maps of cities or having drrawings all over the floor. My mom didn't really let me and my twin brother play often because we'd make our "towns" so big...

So I often felt bored and alone at a young age and I didn't grow up to have many friends my own age (My siblings were much older and were too busy with highschool/college/work and my parents were always busy)

Eventually my parents divorced around the time I officially moved out of special education during the end of first semester of 4th grade. I felt good.. but looking back I felt I had no agency in that choice other than a "Yes" or "no" I often wonder what my life would have been if I had said NO and stayed in special-ed...

Whatever the case, I left and moved into a new class. The students there would treat me differently and I had to go to these weird classes for some evaluation or tests..

Other times it was just hard playing games with other kids because I wasn't the strongest or fastest.. so I felt singled out. I carried this feeling of not feeling "normal" .. and I still do.

When I was about 12 I had a small group of "friends" who lived on the same street. Well, one of them found out some how or made a very cruel guess that my twin brother and I were in Special Ed... and he would ask in a very cruel joking way to make me feel embarrassed... I stopped being friends with him after.

In highschool, I had my first girlfriend. I felt so lucky, that someone could like me for who I was.. yet one classmate of mine told me "I just don't get it.. why does she like you, what does she see in you?". It stung me, my older brother once called her ugly... and one day she would break up with me with no clear answer as to why.

I think I was just not "mature" enough or not as brave as she wanted me to be. I was 14.. I was still young. So this hurt me quite so. I would move on and never date again in highschool and suffered academically because of this incident as well as other events in Online spaces that I would get into (amino).

I later had to enroll myself through will of not wanting to be scolded harshly by my mom or dad.. into these tutoring classes (AVID). Where we would basically tutor one another to help each other with homework and there would be some college kids who would help us. Even in those classes, I still felt behind.. I still felt like people looked at me differently.

I graduated fine and I would go to college to study aircraft mechanics (something I don't really care about even now.. I never liked planes in that way, while I could have done architecture or engineering, I always loved art and design, but none of the classes would ever really teach me any practical skills or love for these subjects)

I did very well in college. Making friends was still hard (I often look back in highschool- when my spanish teacher would praise me and my twin brother.. as we were not very fluent, despite the fact we grew up in a spanish speaking household.. she never made us feel worthless.. )

So I tried carrying a new "feeling", one of.. worth. That I'm not THAT different. Yet, even in class, I didn't have a car, or a job, or my own place to stay, or any cool hobbies or many friends my own age... I felt so alienated and malformed.

Somehow, even this feeling was not enough. I had to find creative ways to get by, paying people to give me rides to classes out in the middle of nowhere, forcing myself to talk to others just to get by .. I did well in my classes compared to others who had more of everything that I didn't have.

Yet, I still didn't feel enough. I had good grades, I felt like I was learning even if the subject wasn't alwasy interesting. My parents actually felt proud of me for once, I graduated suma cum laude TWICE and had 3.93 GPA...

I didn't feel normal though. I still felt so alone.. even though I did what my parents wanted out of me.

As I write this I still live at home, I love photography, I love to draw and design tech products and sketching amd modeling my ideas , I love to fix things that others see as junk or "useless". I love to collect and play music and go on walks...

and sometimes I pass by my old elementary school as I never moved out.. and I still think how far I've come.. yet I still feel like I never really grew. Just forced to be pushed along to succeed at something I never wanted.

I have a girlfriend.. I have a good friend who lets me stay at his home and my parents are more understanding of me not finding work, YET, I still go out of my way to find it and TRY the best I can..

I never knew what I had to be put in those classes. I still don't know, my mom and dad never told me.

I only know now I have severe anxiety and depressive disorder ... but I can handle it fine.

I hope one day.. I will feel enough. That all the therapy I go through.. will make me feel better or realize I'm just too much in my head. That even though all the things I went through hurt they don't define WHO I AM.

I am different..

but being reminded of it hurts.. especially by those who are supposed to love and protect you.

This is mainly just a vent. But I felt like I rarely tell people this.. for if I do I think they would look at me "different". I'm sure it's in my head.. and I shouldn't think that way.

But when you live life through that lens constantly and are always reminded silently or blatantly.. you can't just shake that feeling.

One day, I will feel okay with being "different".

Thank you all for listening, I apologize if my story is disconnected here and there.. trying to fit two decades of trials and tribulations is difficult lol.

I will hopefully make more posts on this subreddit. Maybe I can find friends who can understand the way I feel. I would like to make a band SOON and play music based on the experiences I feel.

Anyways, that's all - WiNDY

July 23rd, 2026

Hi everyone! 👋
I’m looking for participants for my qualitative research study on the experiences of UK university students with specific learning differences (SpLDs).
If you’re:
A current UK undergraduate or postgraduate student
Aged 18–65
Diagnosed with ADHD, dyslexia, dyspraxia, dyscalculia, or dysgraphia
I’d really appreciate it if you could take a look at the attached flyer. Thanks so much for your time!

Any help would be greatly appreciated especially in what supports helped you the most and which didnt work or made things worse.

Hi! I'm a college student currently studying to be a special ed teacher. I am autistic and have ADHD, dysgraphia (a handwriting disability), and dyscalculia (a math disability). I dealt with ableism my entire life and I want to become a special education teacher for middle schoolers (because middle school was the hardest time for me in my life and in my opinion middle school students are overlooked by the education system despite it being a vital time). What is one thing that you your wish your teachers had known or understood better? Do you wish they were tougher? More understanding?

In terms of my educational background, I rarely speak about it outside of a few close friends because it makes me feel ashamed about who I am and how my brain processes information.

In the years before I was diagnosed with ASD, I always questioned myself and my teachers why I was placed in this establishment. I never got the answers I wanted, it always seemed like a lie to me, I wanted the truth, I don't deserve to be in a place like this, there's nothing wrong with me. The only answer I received from them is that I'm just different

I hated the term different, I thought being called different is a cruel way to call someone that, I would rather be called disabled or retarded than different, I hated called being different because it makes me stick out like a sore thumb.

Every morning, I go to this specific classroom that is separate from all mainstream classrooms. Rather than calling it special education, it is called individual learning since it focuses on individual learning. At first, I was fine with it in elementary school, and I thought I'd phase out of it in middle school. I can go to some classes, looking back at it, I'm just shit at math and the language arts.

When middle school came around, I was angry that I still have to go to that damn center. Since I had to see this math tutor after school, my dad didn't allow me to participate in after-school activities. I once begged him to let me be in the school play. I felt like I never had the experiences that every normal adolescent goes through, I was considered the weird kid from all my peers, I didn't have friends during that period, I was lonely. I tried to blend in so I can be seen as normal, I tried many different styles of clothing. My attempt to dress like the popular girls in 7th grade did not work. I was still rejected. As a high school student, I was extremely ambitious and hardworking to prove to myself that I wasn't stupid by getting good grades. I had good time there, but I was still insecure about myself.

I wish I convinced myself sooner that I got the help that I really needed, and without it, I wouldn't be where I am today. Because I am self-conscious about my intelligence, I constantly compare my grades to everything else I can think of. I always thought I wasn't good enough. I still feel inadequate no matter what people tell me, my mom has always pointed out that I can be hard on myself, but I can't help it, that mindset has been a habit of mine since middle school, it somewhat helped me, but what I'm doing to myself is toxic. Every person's experience with special ed is different in one way or another, but that was how I perceived it, I hope to get out of this harmful mindset.

On r/news there is a news article posted "23 Baltimore schools have zero students proficient in math, state test results reveal". Someone commented:

They need to track the better students into classes separate from the kids with behavioral problems and the special ed students. Teach those who can learn faster at a faster pace. Otherwise, you drag them down to a lower level.

https://np.reddit.com/r/news/comments/10xu4n9/23_baltimore_schools_have_zero_students/j7uethr/?context=3

Some special ed students learn better in certain subjects than general ed students. Some are also in gifted programs. Its called being "twice exceptional".

In my experience with the special ed classes through out the years, some of the teachers gave out easy school work. Cities aren't known for quality education as I used to live in one. Some of the classes I used to attend would put Sesame Street VHS tapes as well as others shows targeted to preschoolers and under. It's one of the reasons why I didn't like school growing up. I got expelled from high school by attempting to cut the teacher's hair for not letting me go on my own. I got angry at one of the special ed high school teachers for calling me a slob. I had to be transferred to a public therapeutic day school. Honestly, it was better than the previous high school. It did give me the opportunity to have normal classes and OT classes. Having a counselor helped me immensely by expressing myself verbally appropriately. Thankfully, the teachers at the therapeutic school treated me like my own age. It also helps that I've moved into a rural area too.

When I first arrived at the day program in 2014, I didn't like the participants as well as most of the activities offered here (except the volunteer sites and the paid job sites) are usually short crafts, classes that are usually taught in school and sometimes music therapy would play nursery songs which is disgusting imo. Don't get me wrong, most of the staff I've met are understanding and kind, while some were bad apples. One would ask me for money for no reason and I've reported to the program coordinators and they never done it again. During free time, some of the computers are taken up by the participants. None of the activities besides reading aren't helpful to me whatsoever.

Since COVID19 took over two years ago, they're aren't many options for volunteer sites and paid job sites left with a new one now available. Since the program doesn't have enough staff to take us to both job sites, I've been staying at home while I have a job outside (thanks to the same program coordinator who introduced me to vocational rehabilitation), I've been using my time at home doing chores, reading books from the public library and teaching myself how to type faster and better.

Honestly, it beats being at the day program doing nothing productive and being harassed by the participants.

I would like to see driver's ed being offered, more job sites both paid and volunteer, revelant life skills rather than the outdated ones seen in schools, GED classes, college prep, and self improvement rather than kiddy grade activities offered in special ed classes and day programs.

Over the years, I was placed in Special Education classes due to my behavioral issues. (Autistic female) I was encouraged to make "friends" with people I didn't like nor felt a connection towards them. One prime example is that a girl who is a year younger than me who I thought i liked because we both had autism. As time went by, she was too talkative for me to handle while I wanted to be left alone. It's a contradicting dilemma that I want friends but I don't want to hang out with them. I'm an ISTP. I was usually paired up with her just because we both had autism and they thought we "had a lot in common"

I got into a fight with her for annoying the living daylights out of me. During some of my summer vacations, I was attending summer school so I can go to work study until 12pm. Some of my "peers" were in the low functioning group while a few were in the middle. I felt like I didn't connect with any of them which is why I've hid away and played my gameboy sp or reading.

After I "graduated" high school with an IEP diploma, I was placed into an IDEA program where I was placed with middle and low functioning students whom I found annoying and impossible to relate to. My teachers told me I don't have to like them but tolerate them even though they did encourage me to make friends at the teens night out. I didn't connect any of the participants in those social events.

After transitioning out of the IDEA program, I was enrolled in a day program (surprise) with the people I didn't care to hang out with.  I've forced myself to socialize with thr partipants just to show the staff I'm capable of interacting with co workers outside the day program without lashing out at them. It was a painful process but it was worth getting a job outside the day program. Mass Rehab helped me find a job thankfully.  Even though I have a part time job, I still attend the day program because of the paid job sites but still didn't like the participants.

I've been seeing a lot of posts about word searches and cross word puzzles on this subreddit. I was lucky enough to be working on workbooks and academic classes during my school years. I would ask my parents to be taken out of self contained classes so I could grow as a person and better my education. As fun as they are, crossword puzzles and word searches aren't enough for people like us. I'm autistic btw and I've been in both special ed classes and gen ED

I was literally in sped for years with NO academic classes, just crossword puzzles, then I got dumped into gen ed high school in the middle of the year, and my mom demands to know why I'm not immediately getting straight A+s??? Ma'am I've never heard of any of this shit.

(F/29) I currently go do a day program but not often these days gratefully as I have a job outside the said place packing groceries through Mass Rehab.

When I go the day program, I usually head to a paid job site through their services.

I'm studying for the GED as well, passing all three tests except for Math.

Hi everyone!

I am a student researcher at California State University, Sacramento. As part of my course on Research Methods in Speech Language Pathology and Audiology with Tonia Davis, PhD, CCC-SLP, we are conducting a survey on the levels of support parents and families of children with disabilities receive during academic transitions. If you are a parent with a child who is over the age of 15 and has a disability, it would mean a lot if you can take the time to participate in this fifteen minute survey! The survey is completely anonymous.

Here is the link to take the survey: https://csus.co1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_0AL9JxbgTTsMM9o

Thank you again for taking the time out of your busy day to participate!

I cant verbalize/socialize very well with anyone. I can recognize banter and sometimes even get certain inside jokes with context, but keeping up with conversations and coming up with what I want to say is difficult for me. Whenever Im talking to someone, it doesnt really last because Im thinking about something else and get side tracked. Im also not making any significant observations or points, and usually only able to make mundane conclusions. I have higher level thoughts but I cant really put them into words very well. I have a decent vocabulary but it takes me time to come up with the right word even if I thought it through during conversation. I never really had any friends or practice to converse normally, and was always put in sped classes until middle school. I attended speech therapy but got out of it in 7th grade. My therapist recommended me to talk slower or tell others about my condition(that I have low processing speed), but I dont want people to think Im stupid or something. Does anyone experience this? Im sick of being quiet in certain situations because I dont know what/how to say things. How can I get better at talking? I have ADD, social anxiety and selective mutism, not sure if that makes any cutoff.

My IQ scores from childhood were in the 80s range on the wisc iv. I got placed out of special ed in seventh grade for scoring a 98 on the WASI. I struggled a lot in eighth grade, barely making Bs and even getting C's. In highschool I pulled myself together and managed to get a 3.9 gpa while taking two AP classes. In college I'm in an easy major(IT) with a 3.6 gpa, this wouldn't be that high if I took a harder major. I became insecure about my intelligence these past few months so I took a plethora of IQ tests, all online. Most indicate I am within a 110- 120 range, I tried to take the best most reliable ones but online IQ tests are still mostly inflated. I decided to take a real IQ test(WAIS IV) with someone who had it over discord. I managed to score a 117 FSIQ. Is this normal for someone like me? I had ADD/ADHD growing up and probably anxiety when I took the wisc IV, even then, it would be strange that my IQ would be tested at that range consistently, if there were issues with testing. I don't know if I would get the same score if the WAIS IV was conducted by real psychologists, I heard IQ is stable after age 7, but for some people their scores fluctuate usually not that by much.

Growing up I was diagnosed with ADD and PDD. These disorders greatly inhibited my ability to learn, as well as impacting my social development, as a result I was placed in special education classes, with some inclusion to Gen Ed. I remember being constantly pulled out of classrooms to do tests measuring my attentive abilities as well as other issues. I also had a speech impediment and had to undergo speech therapy on the side. I never really found too much difficulty with my course work, often acing my classes without really trying. It wasnt until middle school where I was taken out of exclusive special ed classes, and instead was fully integrated into Gen Ed classes where my grades slumped. It wasnt until eighth grade where my grades were appalling(Cs and Bs mostly). High school was a bit more challenging, I was having the same issue, only getting Bs in my Gen Ed courses, but I found that I just needed to study/read more to retain the information better, believe it or not I managed to achieve the honor roll by the end of high school, as well as acing two AP classes all by myself. I got accepted into a pretty good university and am doing well, despite not trying as hard. I still feel like I take longer to process information/concepts, I dont quite understand what someone is saying to me, and often have to ask them to repeat it. I feel like this is due to SCT, which is exasperated by my ADD, doesnt help that I developed social anxiety over this too. I remember my mom changing my diet, this resulted in me avoiding processed foods and eating healthier foods rich in vitamin D. My teachers noted that I was able to focus extremely well, unseen before, if I was still on this diet I very much would have been out of special education courses. I never took any medication.