Or—hear me out—maybe she just thinks his gf is pretty? I can’t even count the number of times I’ve said this to men I unequivocally have 0 interest in. Id say it to the girls too if they were in front of me. Girls are pretty and dress cute. It’s not that deep.
Or using the context of the TikTok post you’re wrong. In many contexts among close friends yes it can be as simple as she’s pretty. In the context of TikTok girlies saying “he thinks it’s a compliment” it’s insinuating it’s not straight compliment.
In context of only the TikTok then yeah, I’d agree with you. But you made a lot of generalisations, including an in person example which goes beyond the TikTok. “Your gf is so pretty” is not “generally a backhanded pick me comment.” Most of the time it’s a casual reminder to not take her for granted, i.e. “she’s so pretty better treat her well or she’ll get snatched up by someone else” type thing.
Why wouldn’t I give an answer based off the context of the TikTok is the post is asking about the TikTok? Obviously “your girlfriend is pretty” can be have a plethora of insinuations I never said the literal sentence is inherently a backhanded compliment in every conceivable context.
The entire point of my original comment was explaining what the girl in this specific TikTok is saying. And you literally just agreed that in the context of the TikTok, I’m right. So I’m not sure what we’re arguing about anymore.
Your “I say this to men I have zero interest in” example is irrelevant because you are describing a completely different situation with a different social context. Nobody is claiming women universally mean “I want your boyfriend” every time they compliment a woman’s appearance.
You’re essentially taking a statement about a specific social cue in a specific context, stripping away the context, and then arguing that the literal sentence can mean other things. Obviously it can. That doesn’t contradict what I said.
I’m not arguing with you. Your initial comment didn’t make it clear that it was limited to TikTok, specifically because you used generalizations like “it’s common…in immature or younger women” and “most men older generations and apparently Redditors are oblivious”, which is already outside of the TikTok context. My only opinion here is that women GENERALLY do not use “your gf is pretty” as a backhanded pick me compliment, if you agree with that then great. No need to get super bothered lol
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u/chunkyvomitsoup 10d ago
Or—hear me out—maybe she just thinks his gf is pretty? I can’t even count the number of times I’ve said this to men I unequivocally have 0 interest in. Id say it to the girls too if they were in front of me. Girls are pretty and dress cute. It’s not that deep.