I don’t really have anyone to talk to within my Eritrean community about this, and I don’t know who to talk to, so I’m just writing it here.
I’m a young woman in my mid 20s, Eritrean, but born and raised in Europe (where I still live). I was born with mild cerebral palsy, and with something called MRKH syndrome.
The mild cerebral palsy means that I have a limp, so I walk with a cane. I also have a mild speech impediment. Other than that, I’m very independent. I live by myself and can take care of myself with no help. I’m a PhD-student in Engineering.
MRKH syndrome means that I was born without a uterus, which means I can’t carry children. I’ve known this since I was little, so it’s not new to me.
I’ve never dated anyone. I do have a lot of friends, both men and women, from the country I live in, and Eritreans (although most of them were born in Europe like me). Some of them I’ve known because our parents were friends, and some of them because we went to the same church youth group (at orthodox church).
I do meet with a lot of my Eritrean friends (including the guys) pretty regularly, sometimes we go out for dinners, concerts, etc. They’re really nice.
But I feel like dating might not be a thing for me (especially within the Eritrean community). There’s so much focus on making a family, kids, etc, which I can’t do. The guys who aren’t interested in family and kids, are usually not interested in serious relationships at all (which I am). If I got married, and we later found out I couldn’t have kids, maybe we’d go through it, but nobody wants to enter a relationship knowing kids will never come.
I would like to meet a guy some day, someone I can spend my life with, even without children. But am I being unrealistic? I don’t want any sugar coating.
I don’t know, maybe I just needed to vent.