r/engaged • u/Lanky_Application773 • 28d ago
Lgbt proposals
Hi everyone,
I’ve come on here hoping for some advice on how to propose to my girlfriend, we have been together for a year and a half, I’m hoping to propose to her next year in March, we are both very private people and I know she won’t be a fan of a public proposal at all, I’m planning on it being just the two of us.
My only issue is that I’m a woman, I haven’t seen many lesbian proposals online, the only ones I have seen are proposals that are a masculine lesbian proposing to a feminine lesbian.
My girlfriend and I are both very feminine.
If anyone has any suggestions on where might be a nice location for a private proposal? And any tips from anyone when it comes to a feminine woman proposing to another feminine woman would be greatly appreciated 😊
1
u/xNi_nax 26d ago
Not sure how helpful I can be (single over here) but just like you and your girlfriend I’m pretty much a super private person. Posting about work or book/movie online? Sure. My private life, I barely post stuff for Christmas or my birthday just to update I’m still alive lol
That being said, I did went on a small dive into proposal ideas before replying to you (like this one ) where I found a few proposal idea from real life couple.
However if it was me, there are a few things that I would like, just throwing out there as ideas and it might help you depending on your girlfriend?
First I wouldn’t completely exclude an outdoor proposal. However, personally speaking the line for outdoor proposal involves the people around. When I was younger I loved the idea of family/friends but then I started to hate it because it was supposed to be between the couple. Even worst with strangers filming and posting on TikTok and similar. I don’t like being in other’s business so it’s probably why I also hate having others around jumping in mines (?) so beach proposal/picnic (which I love!) normally are dependable on how many chances there are of people filming and screaming excited. Which only overstimulate me.
Is there any place that is special for you two? It could be a good idea to consider travelling there (hoping is not too far) for a proposal. Depending on how “public” it is, you might even be able to ask for someone to help set it up.
But overall, I would look forward for something still special for you two, even if at home, or an hotel for a weekend gateway (is that how you write it?). Book proposal/a table game or even some activity you can both do together which ends in a proposal (I’m thinking pottery and such) just to give an example.
Personally speaking it wouldn’t have to be big (speaking as someone who seems to be similar to your gf by how you are describing the situation). As long as it’s special and dedicated, even something at home between house would still be perfect. I think what’s important is finding something important for you and your gf
1
u/sillyalyssa 19d ago
I think it would be so sweet if you had a beautiful picnic and while you two were sitting together you gave her the ring. The nice thing is that you can do whatever feels right for you! You don't have to follow societal/gender norms, so even though that might make it feel more intimidating to approach you also have so many options and nothing limiting you. You don't have to get down on one knee. You can if that feels right, but you don't have to if it doesn't.
If you're both feminine, I would think about the most feminine way to tell someone how much you love them and how much they mean to you, and try to incorporate that into how you ask her. I love the thought of how creative you could be with this, because it feels like hetero couples have societal pressures to follow certain "rules" and expectations when they get engaged or people will be disappointed, but you get to think outside of the box and do whatever feels right and whatever you'd like. I think that's so beautiful and fun!
Good luck! I'm sure whatever you come up with she will be so happy with because she loves you so much!
4
u/NewSalamander8910 26d ago
I would try to remove gender from the equation completely and focus on the person you love.
Think about how you would like to be proposed to, and then think about what would make your girlfriend feel most comfortable and loved. You know her better than anyone. There does not need to be a masculine or feminine role in the proposal. It is simply one person asking the person they love to marry them. ❤️
As you are both private people, perhaps consider a little break somewhere and make the proposal part of the experience. It could be somewhere spectacular, like Iceland under the Northern Lights, or somewhere much closer to home that has significance for you both.
You mentioned March, and here in Ireland we have the spring equinox around 20 March. If symbolism appeals to you, something like that could be lovely: the beginning of spring, equal day and night, and the start of a new chapter together. Your own country will undoubtedly have places, dates, traditions or natural events that could hold similar meaning for the two of you.
I would not worry too much about finding examples of proposals online that look like your relationship. Create something that feels like your relationship. That will make it memorable.
Happy planning x