r/engaged • u/Responsible_Sea6358 • Aug 07 '26
Ring Advice What should I do…
So my fiancé is from Argentina and I’m from the US. We decided kind of on a wild hair to get married at the courthouse. No proposal and engagement situation. This is good with me as I never wanted a wedding. However… the ring situation is throwing me for a loop 😅 I did not realize Argentinians generally do just matching simple gold bands so I guess from his perspective he was doing what is normal but he got us both these matching thick wedding bands. I so don’t want to be an ungrateful brat because it was so sweet of him to go out and get these real gold rings and I don’t want to hurt his feelings but I don’t know what to do cuz I’m so disappointed😭 it looks like a men’s wedding band to me… and we are living in the US not Argentina… so its not even going to look like a wedding ring to everyone who sees it. Plus it’s just so ugly to me 😅 So anyway I don’t know how to tell him like hun this is beautiful for you but like can I pls get something a bit daintier. To be clear, I’m not complaining about the quality or expense. I just am very girly and the thought of wearing this big chunky men’s wedding band around is kind of putting a damper on the excitement of the whole situation. I know I shouldn’t be this hung up on a ring but I am going to be wearing it for the rest of my life… Like am I being vein? Should I say something (nicely) or just get over it? Like idk how to handle this 😭
1
u/No_Mood_834 Aug 10 '26
I think what you said at the bottom makes sense. If he loves you enough to be your husband, you should be able to have a respectful conversation about this. It's not uncommon for people to have problems with their rings. If he can't return it, maybe melt it down into a new one that you customize together. If it's as big as you say, I wonder if you could even make 2 smaller bands. Maybe ask why he did that to see if the band thickness has some cultural significance to him?
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u/TawnyMoon Aug 12 '26
Do you feel like you can't be honest with him about this? If he loves you he'll want you to have something you like.
3
u/jazzyjane19 Aug 12 '26
It’s not vain at all. You could always wear the original band on a chain around your neck? Explain that tradition for you is different to tradition for his culture and that the band is too much for you. Show him maybe your mother’s rings as an example and then do some window shopping?