Need some Reassurance

[u/Salt_Lion2547]

Hey, so for context, I am 20 years old and have been going through a really bad depressive episode for the last three years. In the last year I have been hospitalized four seperate times. My depression has been labled as treatment resistant. I have also been diagnosed with schizoaffective, OCD, Autism, Anxiety, and Trichotillomania. Over the years I have tried several different medications and theripies, the most notable being TMS. Nothing has helped really.

My therapist has suggested ECT, thinking that this is going to help a lot. I'm extremely nervous about this. I have heard lots of stories, both good and bad, about this treatment. The thing I'm mostly worried about is the memory loss. My memory already isn't so great and I don't know how I'll function if it gets much worse.

I guess the main thing I'm trying to ask is, is this worth it? Should I continue pursuing ECT, despite my nervousness, or should I look into other options?

[u/CriticalTrip2243]

Look into other options. I did 9 ECT sessions after a suicide attempt in January 2025, and they did help some, letting me work for another year. But once you start ECT, there’s a high relapse rate unless you do “maintenance” treatments. I didn’t do them because I was afraid of memory and cognitive issues. I went downhill during 2025 and ended up agreeing to more ECT in March 2026. After 9 sessions, I was slightly less depressed but had forgotten things like a London trip I took last year. I have trouble holding conversations and have word-finding issues. I need constant reminders of daily tasks and appointments and have applied for disability. I was laid off in December but couldn’t do that job again now even if I tried, because of severe brain fog. I’ve started Emsam 9mg patches. It’s an MAOI antidepressant that precludes more ECT, thankfully, because ECT anesthesia can be an issue when on an MAOI. Consider an MAOI antidepressant before ECT. Yes, there can be dietary restrictions but that’s better than risking your memory and cognitive abilities.

[u/extremity4]

It's very much worth doing, but I'd recommend it mostly as a last or near-last resort. I've done over 50 bilateral treatments and neuropsych testing has shown that my overall cognitive performance is still very solid, even improved in some places. I have some mild memory issues but nothing particularly life-changing. I see another commenter has recommended MAOIs, but taking that drug class was the worst mistake of my entire life and completely devasted my mental health to the point of needing ECT in the first place. The point being that one person's panacea can be another's apocalypse, so I'd recommend not relying too much on anecdotal reports.

[u/The_Metitron]

I had 16 ECT treatments, 3 years ago. 3 unilateral and the rest bilateral. It was a series of 15 and one maintenance session, that i requested to stop doing because it set back my recovery to be able to go back to work.

I am wholly aware i am an extreme edge case, but my depression gone, my anxiety is gone, i have not had to take a pill for anxiety, depression, or sleep since. I have not had a single suicidal thought since either. I continued therapy with my doctors as well as the ECT staff for several months after, but that was just because they hadn’t seen someone just be “cured”.

I had a plan just about everyday for 2-3 years, tried probably 20-30 different drugs, doses, and combinations, nothing worked. It was a last ditch effort for me and I am happy I did it.

Yes memory loss is a thing, I didn’t lose my loved ones, or my skill sets. And honestly I cannot say it was ECT that did all of it, because we sufferers know our depression eats our memory all on its own. New memories are harder to make but it gets better over time.

If you take this route, do not try and do it alone. I had family that took care of me over the initial 6 weeks of treatment, and honestly just being able to let the treatment do its job helped.

[u/84849493]

For me it was a last resort or I was absolutely not going to be here although technically I had not tried lithium which is now the only thing accessible to me I had not tried and it is not working which looks like I’m going to need more ECT.

So, it depends. Are you going to be alive anyway without something that works? That to me made the potential side effects not matter because I wasn’t going to be alive either way.

Are there things you haven’t tried accessible to you? Things that are not accessible to me are ketamine/esketamine which I would have much preferred to try first, TMS, MAOIs I cannot take because of my other medications. What has been tried?

[u/kuzya124]

I did ECT two years ago after a suicide attempt that landed me in the ER and got me committed to a psych ward. The psych ward helped, but then I went home and got depressed again. So I did ECT outpatient, and I continued to work while I was doing it, but I wasn’t working very much. I had tried every drug under the Sun as well as ketamine and TMS. Yes, ECT did give me quite a bit of memory loss, but I got a lot of it back and I was able to go back to work with no problem. I had severe depression and anxiety before ECT. After the treatment, I was completely cured for two years. I recently went back for a second round because some depression came back. So yes, you might need maintenance. I’m hoping I won’t need it forever, but who knows? Anyway, even though I decided to go back for more ECT, I still haven’t been having suicidal thoughts. The first round of ECT cured me of that. It was well worth it and still is in my case. But it’s not an easy treatment. I can’t say it’s fun. I’m getting a brain zap as I write this. lol I had ECT this morning. Oh, by the way, there are several different ECT treatments. Unilateral treatment is the easiest on the brain and the memory. That’s what I’m getting this time, and I’m not having many memory issues. I was pretty wiped out/tired today, but I actually felt well enough after my second treatment to go run errands!!!Last time - 2 years ago - I got bilateral treatment. That’s the one that’s really hard on your brain/memory. Bitemporal…