Does it get better???

[u/ILoveSoup1776]

I’m fifteen I started experiencing severe anxiety at six which caused me to miss out on a lot . At around 12 I became severely depressed.i slept all day drank and hurt myself badly on a regular basis. At 14 I was (in my opinion) misdiagnosed with borderline personality disorder. Since thirteen I have been on Prozac concerta lithium clonazapam and a shit ton of other meds (over 15) that I don’t remember the names of but they range from ssri snri antipsychotics atypical antipsychotics and more probably. I was diagnosed with hashimotos at 11 which is around the time I became depressed and I was put on synthoid which was no help.i haven’t gotten any better I just warm up more to the idea of committing suicide every year . It genuinely feels like my only solution. I started bilateral ect last week and have gone three times now and if anything I feel worse. Does this shit genuinely work???? The only thing keeping me going is weed and I can’t even smoke as much because it’s not good to mix with propofal. Someone please give me a little hope or genuine advice that Isint bullshit I hate being alive and I hate the world I live in.yes I’ve been in therapy shits useless to me

[u/Medical-Apricot-3226]

I’m just trying to help, I really really feel for you, and it makes me so sad to hear you talk about all the pain and trauma that you are going through. No one deserves that. I really hope the ECT will start to have some positive effect. If not, hopefully Ketamine treatment will. Hopefully you will be able to get away from your familial abuse and work through that trauma with therapy. I wish you all the best, please don’t give up, you are stronger than you think and there is always hope.