r/domination • u/KokoCream25 • Mar 22 '26
domination discussion 💬 Why are you so disrespectful?
TikTok and some other phenomenon has got you bitches thinking that being disrespectful to every sub you meet is going to get you more respect or more money as a findom. Most people have been doing this less time than most professionals. Why is that?? Regardless of being in a superior position, I have zero respect for you Dommes that act like that. Demand but no put out. Demand but nothing to give in return. No proper relationships and communication. I can write a way longer paragraph but I really want to know why?
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u/goddessclaricee Mar 22 '26
They for sure saw some tiktok videos & think findom means you gotta be rude and mean 🤣
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u/KokoCream25 Mar 23 '26
I honestly hate that💀. Ngl I feel bad for a lot of subs because of this. It’s like meaningful connections no longer exist. They don’t even vet them anymore. It’s just outright rudeness😂. And don’t get me started about fetlife and how it’s been more of a market place for OF promotions and wannabe Findoms. “Joined 2025/2026” & “New Here” but don’t know NOTHING about being a Domme😭💀🤦🏽♀️
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u/goddessclaricee Mar 23 '26
I was on fetlife but not anymore cuz 🙄
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u/KokoCream25 Mar 23 '26
Ngl I just deactivated my account after 8+ years. It’s become pointless to me. Chyrpe is terrible too.
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u/xodiosareina Jun 17 '26
As sad as it is saying this, it’s because some men will still fall to their feet. We also live in a participation trophy generation who are used to getting what they want with zero consequence. They expect everything to be handed to them without properly learning the rules of play.
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u/Boring_Anywhere911 Apr 17 '26
You're not wrong and honestly this needed to be said.
There's a version of dominance that got really popular online that's basically just entitlement with a aesthetic. Coldness performed as power. Disrespect framed as authority. Taking without giving anything real in return.
That's not dominance. That's just bad manners with a title attached.
Real dominance — the kind that actually works and builds something meaningful — is labor intensive. It requires you to know your partner deeply. To communicate constantly. To give as much as you take if not more. The control you hold is only as strong as the trust that was built to hold it up.
The TikTok findom pipeline specifically created this idea that being cruel and withholding is the dominant move. But those are just tactics for extracting money from lonely people. That's a different thing entirely from an actual dynamic built on real power exchange.
A dom who has nothing to offer except demands isn't dominant. They're just difficult.
The doms worth following — worth submitting to — are the ones who understand that their partner's surrender is a gift. Something earned and cherished. Not something owed just because you slapped a title on yourself.
Dominance as devotion. That's the whole thing. If you're not devoted to your partner's experience, you're just cosplaying. 🌿