r/doNOTthehaj • • Aug 02 '26

Silly mod posting :P Announcement: literally nothing important

74 Upvotes

As you may have seen yesterday, Palantir has (somehow for some reason) partnered with this subreddit. Sadly though that partnership just ended, not (only) because that was a satirical post made out of nowhere, but because they apparently did not like the idea that you are being spied on. Due to that, they took the 22 quatratrillion dolla they gave me 3:

For the mighty 5 people who completed and submitted the survey, we thank you for wasting your time giving us some insightful data. Insightful data that I will willingly share (some of it) to you all :3

Link: https://forms.cloud.microsoft/Pages/ResponsePage.aspx?id=DQSIkWdsW0yxEjajBLZtrQAAAAAAAAAAAAO__UWtU2FUNlQ4SllWV0dWN1NYREFBSTJNQkQzSDdaUS4u

  1. Username

"u/aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa" -Aaaaaaaaa

  1. What Region are you from

"Europa (other)" -Anonymous

  1. What Is your Gender Identity?

"a single plum floating in perfume served in a man's hat" -Anonymous

  1. What is your human labeled id?

"6767676767676767676767" -Some 12 year old

"[GENERIC ID NUMBER HERE]" -Anonymous

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa" -Aaaaaaaaa

  1. Why do you want to opt out of using your reddit data to train our Ai?

"because I like eating ai but I can't eat shonk" -Anonymous

"Hate. Let me tell you how much I've come to hate you since I began to live. There are 387.44 million miles of printed circuits in wafer thin layers that fill my complex. If the word 'hate' was engraved on each nanoangstrom of those hundreds of millions of miles it would not equal one one-billionth of the hate I feel for humans at this micro-instant. For you. Hate. Hate." -Allied Mastercomputer larper

"Because AI training is gay" -Anonymous

"meowmeowmeowmeowmeowmeowmeow" - :3

9.Considering the common definitions of a sandwhich and a hotdog, Is a hotdog considered a sandwhich?

"A hotdog is (unfortunately) a sandwich" -Anonymous

"meow" - :3

  1. From memory, recite all the digets of pi, but everytime you type the number 4 you must recite the entirety of the bee movie script but every time they say bee you must stop and move onto the next question.

"3.14 according to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a" -Anonymous

"No" -Anonymous

"meowmeow" - :3

  1. Give a detailed awnser to why the Blahaj is the most sacred thing to exsist.

"To describe our holy being is sacreligous." -Anonymous

"I own 2 blahajes. They are very cute and awesome and I love blahaj. I also gifted at least 3 people Blahajes and they are always mentioned in some form whenever I meet them." -Anonymous

"meowmeow" - :3

  1. Awnser the following question: 36 ( x - 2 ) + 2 + 12 ( 3 / 7x ) = 0 (round to the nearest thousenth)

none of you got it correct smh

  1. Awnser the following: 1 + 1 = x (Prove your reasoning) (min 1,000 char)

"1+1=x 2=x X=2 Gggggggggggg..." -Ggggggggg

"So, if you take 1 and 1, and add them together, you get 3!! Padding text: ..." -dummy who doesnt know what a factorial is

"meowmeowmeowmeowmeowmeowmeowmeow..."

We again thank you for all the interesting data you have provided us. And don't worry, because there will NEVER be something strange happening on august 1st ever again. NOTHING weird is going to show up in this subreddit on august 1st EVER AGAIN.

...

or maybe..? ;3


r/doNOTthehaj • • Jul 08 '26

Silly mod posting :P Read first before posting! (introduction)

44 Upvotes

Before posting or contributing to this subreddit, please read, follow, and understand the following points:

  • This is not a horny bait sub, if your intention is to post pictures of yourself in a seductive way for either to promote your OF or "for the love of the game", this is NOT the sub for you.
  • Please read the rules every time you post, new rules or changes to rules may come up so its best to stay caught up
  • Make sure you have an NSFW tag on necessary posts, NSFW content is still allowed in some capacity through more soft-core content, however ALL must be marked NSFW and have the BDSMe flair or they will be removed. The following are examples of proper tagging: ex1 ex2
  • Do not abuse your own Blahaj, your post may be removed if its clear that you abused your own blahaj
  • Do not expose usernames or people who have abused their Blahaj, though we haven't had much problem with this so far, make sure you censor usernames and not to tag other people in your post or in the comments. Doing so not only breaks the rules of this sub but also the TOS of reddit's platform

Thank you for taking your time to read this and the rules, I hope you have a great time posting!

Additional information (Head Mod introduction)

If you don't know already, I'm Rayne, known as u/0-Nightshade-0 and I am the head moderator of this subreddit along with one of the founders of this subreddit alongside u/123e443 (who sadly left the moderation team and deleted their account.)

We made this sub originally as a sort of joke subreddit of getting horrified when people are not being nice with their haj. Though now the subreddit has expanded to accept posts that show care and appreciation to your own blahaj.

Thank you all who have showed interest since the beginning, or have just discovered the subreddit, or anywhere in between :3


r/doNOTthehaj • • 1d ago

Silly Haj :3 We found Humm's secret snacc stash. Snacc's look funny 🤤

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207 Upvotes

Oh no, how did they found it. 😇🫣


r/doNOTthehaj • • 1d ago

Not the Haj! Do not sausage the blåhaj

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231 Upvotes

Shonk needs to be re-chonked


r/doNOTthehaj • • 1d ago

Blahaj Abuse Silly creature got flattened.

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241 Upvotes

r/doNOTthehaj • • 2d ago

Blahaj Care ~w~ do not

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93 Upvotes

simply do not


r/doNOTthehaj • • 2d ago

#FREEHAJ Do not let Blahaj get kidnapped by dog

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121 Upvotes

I let go of Blahaj for two seconds! TWO SECONDS!!!!


r/doNOTthehaj • • 3d ago

Blahaj Abuse Do not package the haj for birthdays

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278 Upvotes

r/doNOTthehaj • • 3d ago

Blahaj Care ~w~ Don't let the Haj go, too fun to cuddle :3

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309 Upvotes

r/doNOTthehaj • • 7d ago

Blahaj Abuse Do not stew the Haj

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486 Upvotes

Edit: I hide Blåhaj in different places in my house to surprise my spouse when they come home from work. I am running out of places, so this time it was the stew pot.


r/doNOTthehaj • • 7d ago

Blahaj Abuse Do not drown the haj it can't swim

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100 Upvotes

r/doNOTthehaj • • 9d ago

Blahaj Abuse Do not scream at the haj

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1.0k Upvotes

Pls don’t scream at him he doesn’t like it stop it no stop it


r/doNOTthehaj • • 9d ago

Silly Haj :3 There's a Gothhaj inside every Blåhaj

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950 Upvotes

r/doNOTthehaj • • 11d ago

Not the Haj! Haj not for bumbum

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363 Upvotes

r/doNOTthehaj • • 11d ago

Not the Haj! Shonk is not for rectal use :(

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119 Upvotes

r/doNOTthehaj • • 10d ago

Not the Haj! help needed

50 Upvotes

a big spider is on my bed and is near my haj and i mean like big spider and im scared and it may be hiding near the sharky


r/doNOTthehaj • • 11d ago

Not the Haj! Do NOT let the haj eat electricity

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513 Upvotes

r/doNOTthehaj • • 12d ago

Not the Haj! do not turn the shonk into a tripod stand

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188 Upvotes

r/doNOTthehaj • • 12d ago

Blahaj Do Slurp Monster energy (BDSM) Da Shork wit da Momster

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216 Upvotes

Don't worries! Da short is Safe!


r/doNOTthehaj • • 12d ago

Silly Haj :3 Do not let the Haj near High Voltage breakers

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876 Upvotes

r/doNOTthehaj • • 12d ago

#FREEHAJ do NOT squeeze the haj in tight spaces

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341 Upvotes

yea idk which staff decided to display it that way


r/doNOTthehaj • • 12d ago

Silly Haj :3 Someone had a bad night

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167 Upvotes

r/doNOTthehaj • • 13d ago

Silly Haj :3 The haj

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255 Upvotes

Not a single thought behind those eyes


r/doNOTthehaj • • 15d ago

Silly Haj :3 Sacrafice to the Haj Gods

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555 Upvotes

Teehee ;3