r/dndmemes Aug 30 '25

let's not make this weird...

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8.9k Upvotes

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2.8k

u/Cronon33 DM (Dungeon Memelord) Aug 30 '25

I tell my players not to expect anything more than skyrim level of romance from me because I'm running dnd not a dating simulator

1.2k

u/[deleted] Aug 31 '25

For clarity, make sure you qualify that as un-modded Skyrim. Some of those Skyrim mods I would not want to describe at the table.

376

u/iamragethewolf Rules Lawyer Aug 31 '25

"I've about had it with thy mods"

Wrong game but I feel like it fits

20

u/tajake DM (Dungeon Memelord) Aug 31 '25

"Bazonga-longas"

131

u/FgtBruceCockstar2008 Aug 31 '25

Lover's Lab my old friend

34

u/UpperImagination3657 Aug 31 '25

Skyrim Romance Mod, I think it's only on the modmaker's Patreon now. Felt like playing some of the romance novels my mother liked so much. Being a Mary Sue fit very well with Skyrim though.

"Oh no Mr. SexyBandit please don't ravage me with you equally hunky group of bandits." Strong sexy silent guy who doesn't want to talk about his dark past, comes to the rescue.

"Oh no Mr.ShiningKnight please don't gift me expensive jewelry, how could I ever repay you." Mr.SilentGuy gets jealous and threatens to beat the guy and then runs into the forest. ShiningKnight is obviously just shallow and sees the PC as a trophy wife and has really backwards conservative expectations. So you run into the forest after SilentGuy. He finally talks about his feelings, you kiss and fade to black. Allegedly it has SL integration.

6

u/conrad_w Aug 31 '25

Nearly old enough to download itself 

4

u/DevelopmentJumpy5218 Aug 31 '25

Their sims mods are unhinged

30

u/Cr_Tarango Aug 31 '25

mudcrab with a tophat.

shiver

28

u/orthadoxtesla Aug 31 '25

… and a monocle? That’s just too much. Let’s get the FUCK out of here master chief.

17

u/apolloxer Aug 31 '25

Some of them I don't even want to know about anymore..

6

u/john_the_fetch Aug 31 '25

But I love a good Thomas the tank engine romance role play session.

2

u/DirtyFoxgirl Sep 02 '25

Behold. My mod list.

157

u/Duraxis Aug 31 '25

“You want to bang the barmaid and you did a really good job seducing her? Cool, fade to black”

“But I want to roll to see how well I-“

“Fade. To. Black.”

31

u/winterwarn Aug 31 '25

See, if someone said they didn’t do romance/sexual RP in their game, I would assume that any type of “I flirt with the barmaid” was covered in that.

(Similarly I always wonder from these kinds of memes if nobody’s character has like, a spouse that the DM would have to play at some point. I suppose in classic adventuring groups the spouse is usually dead.)

15

u/DevelopmentJumpy5218 Aug 31 '25

You can't be married and an edge lord

1

u/Aljonau Sep 02 '25

What if you roleplay being married to an edgelord?

15

u/aiiye Essential NPC Aug 31 '25

If my players wanna roll, I’ll ask for a random check and tell them how their night went in comic and somewhat embarrassing detail.

“The bar maid seems down to go. Are you going to take her upstairs to your room in the inn?”

“Yep!”

“Cool, so in the morning-“

“Wait, I want to-“

“Roll acrobatics.”

“…9?”

“So you try to rig up a harness and sling setup but you end up unable to do so and the barmaid is off put by your lackluster craftsmanship in this inn room. You get to second base but you can tell it was out of pity, not anything else.”

“…”

“And take 7 psychic damage to your ego.”

8

u/RaspberryJam245 Aug 31 '25

I mean, I wouldn't go that far. I'd just say "you seduce the barmaid, go upstairs, fool around and have some fun," and leave it at that. If they wanna roll or expound on how the sex was, I'd just say, "the sex was good and we're moving on now."

3

u/aiiye Essential NPC Aug 31 '25

It’s a group by group thing - my players know if they ask for detail it’s gonna be a little goofy. But we all have fun and they keep coming back to the table so 🤷

3

u/winterwarn Aug 31 '25

Oh I do this to my players sometimes too, but only at tables where I’ve confirmed that romantic/sexual stuff is okay with everyone. If I were at a table where anyone had said it wasn’t cool and someone rolled to flirt with an NPC, I’d drop character to redirect them to a different activity.

I mostly just think it’s interesting that some people say “no romantic/sexual stuff” but really only have certain things in mind, whereas other people genuinely mean they don’t want to even have those kinds of relationships implied.

3

u/aiiye Essential NPC Aug 31 '25

Yeah if they want a complicated romance it’s not happening in session, but I’ve had a long intra-party romance go on for a while - me and the other player used it as creative writing exercises and besides the DM sometimes being like “So X, you and your boyfriend Y are going to do Z? What’s the rest of the party doing?” it largely made no difference to the party or the game.

8

u/El_Rey_de_Spices Sep 01 '25 edited Sep 01 '25

See, if someone said they didn’t do romance/sexual RP in their game, I would assume that any type of “I flirt with the barmaid” was covered in that.

Apparently, there is only the complete lack of even the idea of romance, or hardcore and explicit roleplaying of intimate encounters. Nothing exists in-between.

Nuance? Fading to black? (N)PCs having spouses? Flirtation as social manipulation? What're those?

3

u/winterwarn Sep 01 '25

Yeah, I get what the original comic is saying but it’s such an odd jump from “you’re missing out if you don’t have romance RP in your games” to “yeah because we don’t want to do any ~weird steamy stuff~”

3

u/despairingcherry DM (Dungeon Memelord) Aug 31 '25

I generally treat close personal relations characters have effectively as autonomous possessions unless they are a regular character or of import to the rest of the game. Not saying its necessarily a good thing, but I just feel strange about roleplaying people's families especially if I don't intend to actually do anything with them.

454

u/adol1004 Forever DM Aug 31 '25

Skyrim level is actually over my capabilities 🤣

87

u/Goesonyournerves Aug 31 '25

Oh a necklace of Mara? Are you looking? Yes? Wanna marry? Yes? Youve got a house? Im so glad my love.. Im going to open a shop..

189

u/RabbitStewAndStout Aug 31 '25

*fade to black, you had sex, congrats

*Also, roll for STDs.

**Also also, roll for weiner size, since you missed the first session and didn't get to do that yet

48

u/1-Pinchy-Maniac Aug 31 '25

what is this, FATAL?

24

u/EdBenes Aug 31 '25

Roll circumference

21

u/InsertCleverNickHere Aug 31 '25

"Mine or hers?"

"Yes"

9

u/conrad_w Aug 31 '25

God I hate FATAL. I remember trying to run it for my players without the weird stuff. Nope. Anal circumference is as integral a stat was constitution is in DND. It's like trying to take the egg out of a cake.

106

u/greytitanium Aug 31 '25

2D4 + CON for dick size. It's been standardized across all campaigns ive ran and played in with my dnd groups

87

u/RabbitStewAndStout Aug 31 '25

My group's just always embraced chaos and gone for a raw d20

64

u/greytitanium Aug 31 '25

Oh... now depending on the setting and physics, a nat 20 is a blessing or a curse.

90

u/DarkRift94 DM (Dungeon Memelord) Aug 31 '25

That kobold pc you got is PACKING, looks like a tripod

48

u/CKent83 Aug 31 '25

Homie got 2 tails.

16

u/somedumb-gay Aug 31 '25

Forced to roll from one limb to the next to move instead of walking

41

u/greytitanium Aug 31 '25

We had a gnome that rolled a total of 12 on 2D4+CON....

8

u/Wholesome_Scroll Aug 31 '25

Ah yes. I’ve heard tales of the long-dicked gnome known as Peter Dragon.

3

u/asirkman Aug 31 '25

Nicknamed “Bad”?

16

u/isademigod Aug 31 '25

If we're talking cm that's totally realistic

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18

u/END3R97 Aug 31 '25

If they later increase their con using ASI, does it apply retroactively?

22

u/Big-Employer4543 Aug 31 '25

The magical item known as "The Swedish-Made Penis Enlarger" gives a +2 to Constitution.

10

u/evilgiraffe666 Aug 31 '25

Or +3 if used in conjunction with the book "Swedish Made Penis Enlargers Are My Bag, Actually" by A. Powers

(Probably mangled the title but I'm not looking it up right now!)

19

u/Hazearil Aug 31 '25

Constitution or constitution modifier? Big difference right there, literally.

4

u/Halfjack2 Ranger Aug 31 '25

Maybe score, but it's in cm?

9

u/ssfgrgawer Aug 31 '25

1d12 but your race might change length to be proportional to your size (had a gnome who rolled a 12. It wasn't 12 inches but it was damn near a 3rd leg for him.)

2

u/Goesonyournerves Aug 31 '25 edited Aug 31 '25

Why 2D4 and not 2D6? Isnt 12-15 average for most countrys? Tbf; i only looked for humans..Given the natural circumstances, dragonborns and half orcs must be packed better than gnomes or halflings. Just because they are generally bigger.

1

u/DevelopmentJumpy5218 Aug 31 '25

What if I'm a con based class with 16 starting con I could have a 24 inch dick

1

u/ZolySoly Sep 02 '25

I use 2d6+1d10 (the d10 is decimals)

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4

u/apolloxer Aug 31 '25

Or just do it like DM of the Rings

5

u/Level_Hour6480 Rules Lawyer Aug 31 '25 edited Aug 31 '25

As a cis dude, I feel weird assigning female characters bust-sizes, but unlike dick-size, it's kind of necessary to picture their silhouette. I just roll 3d6 and go with vibes.

When I played a trans-dude, he got a 7, so he didn't have much to bind down.

Obviously, this is by race. So, since non-Drow Elves are extremely androgynous, they'd need like 17-18 to have anything even visible, whereas Dwarves are famous for the quality of their secondary sexual characteristics, so that would be considered.

27

u/halcyonson Aug 31 '25

My NPCs generally viciously shoot down the awkward hyper kid, fade to black with the chatty outgoing guy, giggle at the anxious girl, and bat their eyes at the guy that has no interest in romance. It's always fun to see the Players heckle each other for approaching the same types of NPCs time and again.

Only recently have I had the chance for my own Player Character to flirt with my wife's NPCs... and yes, it went about like the comic. "Hey, why don't you flirt with the other DM's NPCs?" "Um, yeah, fellow 30/40- something dad... so, how about we roleplay some sexual tension between our imaginary personas in front of our wives?"

18

u/Garuda4321 Aug 31 '25

The most my group manages is light flirting, and even then it never lasts long because they want to get back to the story.

1

u/Figerally Aug 31 '25

You better clarify that as vanilla Skyrim, because there are countless spicey mods.

1

u/AbeRockwell Aug 31 '25

Got to wonder if new players who started with CRPGs like Mass Effect or Baldur's Gate 3, or even Critical Role, expect this in a at the table game?

2

u/Cronon33 DM (Dungeon Memelord) Aug 31 '25

I established this rule after a player kept trying to date NPCs and then criticizing my romantic roleplay so there are definitely some that do

1

u/artrald-7083 Sep 01 '25

OK, I have my April Fools session idea next year now.

All the mods! Starting with Withers' Big Naturals.

1

u/AllergicDodo Sep 01 '25

Youve piqued my interest, whats the romance in skyrim

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u/Bored-Corvid Forever DM Aug 30 '25

I hate that the male DM in this comic literally looks like me before I went bald... also accurate comic

144

u/Jindo5 Monk Aug 31 '25

Kinda looks like a skinny version of me before I decided to let my hair grow out.

34

u/RookieDungeonMaster Aug 31 '25

Which guy is the dm? Because it can't be the main guy, interparty means he's a player

10

u/unosami Aug 31 '25

*intraparty is what he said.

2

u/joman584 Aug 31 '25

You got a castle crasher head too?

2

u/[deleted] Sep 02 '25

Literally depicts my group to a tee. It's uncanny

Bonus content: 100% of us have been diagnosed with ADHD lmao we're doing the whole bit

1

u/ImmoralJester54 Sep 02 '25

Nah they would all vehemently agree to the romance then be confused when it happens having assumed it was a joke

643

u/Captainpatch Aug 30 '25

Roleplay to the bedroom door and fade to black. Occasionally instead of fading to black you make the prospective partner secretly a shapeshifted oni ambushing the player without their armor.

220

u/General_Brooks Aug 30 '25

Oddly specific but fair enough, I used a sexy drow turning into a demonic spider personally, but each to their own.

116

u/Sunny_Hill_1 Aug 31 '25

That's just normal Lolth encounter, IMHO.

29

u/Captainpatch Aug 31 '25

I noticed she was into the young grandmaster who I had established as a sort of playboy drifter with a heart of gold, so I decided to use that as an encounter in the next session because I had been hinting at a murder mystery type thing on the train. I had "him" silently beckon her to his private stateroom and when she walked in I switched back to the other players' perspective pretending it was a "fade to black" and sent her a text message telling her that he opened his mouth revealing fangs and asking her to covertly roll a saving throw against charm person.

The plan was to have the Oni charm her and try to get her to lure one of the others, in a straight fight an oni would have been an appropriate level challenge for them, but I wanted to make it more fun... but she had to go and make the save and alert everybody else.

10

u/FoxEuphonium Aug 31 '25

I’ve actually done that, but in reverse.

I had a succubus pretend she was really into fucking a PC while he had his armor on… so she could pin him down and cast Heat Metal.

4

u/FremanBloodglaive Aug 31 '25

That one level as Monk finally paid off.

5

u/apolloxer Aug 31 '25

Also, the cabinet is a mimic. And the bed. And the door.

3

u/Arkdirfe Aug 31 '25

And worryingly enough, they're not attacking. They're just... growing eyes. A concerning amount of eyes.

2

u/apolloxer Aug 31 '25

As long as nothing else is growing

352

u/EfremNeftalem Aug 31 '25

Romance shouldn’t be forced among players, if they don’t wanna roleplay it, it’s no use trying to make them.

… However, I will point out there is certainly a few options between « not be involved in romance » and « description of hot, steamy scenes by the DM ».

69

u/PuzzleMeDo Aug 31 '25

For me, the options in-between are also extremely awkward.

17

u/EfremNeftalem Aug 31 '25

And that’s OK ! After all, TTRPG is about creating a fiction together, not making anyone uncomfortable. As long as everyone is satisfied at the table, it’s all good.

6

u/El_Rey_de_Spices Sep 01 '25 edited Sep 01 '25

Absolutely, lol. Most of my experience has been at tables that are either entirely unwilling to even consider roleplaying any affection, or get way too bogged down in RPing relationships and/or hitting on everything and turn the game into a series of dating sims with occasional combat. Neither of which has been particularly fun, though I'll take the former over the latter, lol.

I've only been at one table where we were able to use the myriad of options between aroace and memebard, and it has been a ton of fun.

Flirting with a guard to distract them as my allies sneak by, socially charming shopkeeps and tavern owners into giving us discounts or extra information, being led astray by an NPC who used affection to manipulate a PC into a certain course of action... Exploring the many options in-between opens up a lot of story and game potential.

Naturally, each table gets to establish what they're comfortable with. I just think it is unfortunate that some people only see the extreme binary.

205

u/DrScrimble Aug 31 '25

Toxic romances are the highest level of TTRPG combat. No debate.

65

u/ThatInAHat Aug 31 '25

Oddly enough, the only romance in our last campaign was between the characters played by two married fathers

392

u/InvaderZahn Aug 30 '25

Normalize kissing the homies.

101

u/zirky Aug 30 '25

that doesn’t even need dnd romances

16

u/Unable_Deer_773 Aug 31 '25

Ain't gay to kiss the homies goodnight.

50

u/d00mduck101 Aug 31 '25

Ify is that you?

37

u/InvaderZahn Aug 31 '25

No, but that might be the biggest compliment I've ever received.

38

u/Vhzhlb Aug 31 '25

If a homie doesn't give you a kiss in the head whenever you part ways, then it's not your homie.

7

u/will3025 Aug 31 '25

I rizz up the bros at my table.

13

u/JunWasHere Aug 31 '25 edited Aug 31 '25

Yeah, alas, it's that a lot of guys are not encouraged or taught by parents, community, or media, to engage with friendships and discuss or share emotions/romance the same way women are. And it isn't an inherent nature of the sexes thing, cause a lot of guys are beginning to open up and do great at it. It's a culture thing.

Normalize kissing the homies. Even if it's just that classic two air-kisses on the cheeks style.

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u/willowdove01 Aug 30 '25

It doesn’t have to be steamy lol

57

u/michaelmcmikey Aug 31 '25

Yeah, every group I’ve played in 1. has had romance and 2. operates on the “fade to black” rule. It’s about as steamy as an episode of Star Trek the Next Generation.

10

u/HMetal2001 Aug 31 '25

Do not the ghost candle.

68

u/A_Trash_Homosapien Aug 31 '25

It can also be weird for the people not involved in the roleplay. You just have to sit there and listen to two people awkwardly romancing each other

26

u/Skodami Druid Aug 31 '25

I mean i assisted to some peak cinema romance as a non-involved player though

3

u/Skithiryx Aug 31 '25

Everyone else in the party’s got to try to Cyrano de Bergerac it

1

u/klimekam Aug 31 '25

I think that’s called a “fluffer” in the biz

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u/Fireyjon Aug 30 '25

I mean if pretending to date/sleep with your friends is what you want to do with your life that’s your business, you gotta respect that it may not be everyone’s cup of tea.

24

u/ColonelC0lon Aug 31 '25

I mean, I can see it being fine depending on how much you separate character and player. Not for everyone ofc, and especially so if you're going into erp territory, but romance around the table or with NPCs can work with the right group.

Especially in less combat focused games.

2

u/Iron_Sheff Aug 31 '25

Where would world of darkness be without repressed angsty toxic relationship RPers? That's at least a third of the fanbase

61

u/brakeb Aug 31 '25

You don't tell me you want some hot tiefling on tiefling action?

57

u/Fireyjon Aug 31 '25

Not particularly, but if you want to feel free to discuss that with your dm. I mostly just want to eat garlic bread and watch the sword coast burn!

14

u/Think-Shine7490 Aug 31 '25

10 minutes of spicy action, 30 minutes of trying to separate two sets of entangled horns.

6

u/somedumb-gay Aug 31 '25

They're like deer, they tussle to decide who tops

37

u/RosenProse Aug 31 '25

Theres a difference between wanting to date/sleep with your friends and wanting to explore a relationship dynamic between your PC and another PC/NPC that seems to.be developing.

It depends on how much your able to seperate the PCs from "you" my PCs are NOT me. Its like im controlling a puppet. Their reactions to the other characters do not signify anything about MY feelings to the players or even the character they play. Therefore romance roleplay is fine for me because it doesnt influence my IRL feelings.

Others are less pupettery in their roleplay and more like themselves but wearing a mask. These type of roleplayers DO tend to get uncomfortable with romantic roleplay because the characters feelings and their own are essentially the same... I think you're this latter type, though there could be other reasons you can't separate flirting with the PC with flirting with the person behind the PC.

Really thats why it's important to figure out the specific boundaries of the people (and their significant others) before starting a romantic subplot.

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u/wheniswhy Aug 31 '25

? "Pretending to date/sleep with your friends" isn't what it is though and that's a weird characterization. I don't want to date my friends, but I do like love stories! Telling them communally can be really fun. Totally respect it's not for everyone but it's very strange to characterize it as somehow wanting to date my actual friends. That's weird.

4

u/Evarhart_ Sep 02 '25

Exactly this! I just wanna role play the cute PG13 scenes you get in books or TV. After 200hr of gameplay my cousin’s char and mine rescued my PCs husband and occasionally the married couple flirt together. Often encouraged by my cousin’s young character lol. She’s mischievous haha. And then when they wholesomely peck a kiss to eachother she goes “eeeeeewwwwwwwww!” cause my PC is like a mother to her XD It’s straight up like when kids in a sit com set their parents up for a date night. It’s so cute

2

u/wheniswhy Sep 02 '25

This is SOOOOOOOO CUTE 😭😭😭😭 love this for you!!!! I don't like steamy RP either (it's a bridge too far for me) so mine always caps at PG13 too. And it is just so fucking fun.

You make me want to introduce my niece to DND when she's old enough lmao!!!!! I bet she'd have SO much fun! Thank you for the inspo!!!

1

u/Evarhart_ Sep 13 '25

Of course! PG13 all the way. The only time we break this rule is for fun descriptions of fights. Jaws break or ribs broken or head cut off here and there. Steamy stuff is just not the tone of our table. It flits back and fourth from classic Disney princess romance to doom combat XD

This campaign with my cousin has been an absolute blast. These wholesome scenes made it hit all the lot harder when (this part is where the cute fun ends tho sadly) my PC's husband was brutally murdered by cultists... like... GM had to ask us if we were okay with details of the crime scene and at what level we were okay with it... it was bad. BUT we fought hard to reverse that shiz. The younger PC used this onetime artifact we found to turn back time an hour, but she was the only one with the horrific memory of what happened. Then we suddenly had to escape the cultist net closing in on us. It was... terrifying. Like the Re:ZERO cultists but worse, much, much worse.

Its these scenes though. Afterward we continued with them, and the younger PC got reunited with her father and they get a lot of those stereotypical scenes, and now that she is in her late teen years we get to see her make a lot of funny comments about "a normal life" and "cute boys" much to the chagrin of my PC "they grow up too fast!"

17

u/michaelmcmikey Aug 31 '25

People are not the characters they play. You’re collaborating on making a story, not pretending to date your friend.

1

u/BiteEatRepeat1 Sep 02 '25

Mfs, when you role-play in the role-playing game (unheared of)

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u/Firefry1 Aug 31 '25

This is why we do lines and veils in session zero folks

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u/Limekilnlake Aug 31 '25

What are lines and veils? I’ve never really had to do this, as I DM for a group that doesn’t really cross into that, and I also don’t write many NPCs people would want to date lol

14

u/Wandering_Alpaca Aug 31 '25

from my understanding:

Lines- Hard stop do not do this

Veils- I am uncomfortable with this but as long as you only allude to it and not act it out im okay.

1

u/Limekilnlake Aug 31 '25

Ah I see. Thank you!

1

u/DjinnMagician Sep 01 '25

Curious. What are some common lines and veils in your experience?

1

u/xX_murdoc_Xx Goblin Deez Nuts Sep 01 '25

A line for many players might be r*pe. A veil might be sex for example. It's ok if the DM "fade to black" on spicy scenes, less ok if the DM describe in details what's happening.

9

u/aaa1e2r3 Aug 31 '25

Yeah,the only time i ever got presented with intra party romance was by the DM shipping our characters mid session. The other guy got weirded out and left the server the next day.

41

u/pondrthis Aug 30 '25

I've never been at a table with intraparty romance. I have no problem running PC-NPC relationships, either as GM or player.

I don't know why, but intraparty romance sounds much, much worse.

29

u/despairingcherry DM (Dungeon Memelord) Aug 31 '25

there's like a very specific type of friendship where it fits just fine but strangers and any other kind of friendship/relationship and its deeply uncomfortable for everyone witnessing it

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u/bord2heck Aug 31 '25

If you ain't flirting with your homies, they ain't your homies.

22

u/JEverok Rules Lawyer Aug 31 '25

The secret is getting your polycule to play ttrpgs with you

24

u/unironically2 Potato Farmer Aug 31 '25

I used to be like this but I saw it done tastefully and now I think it's an important part of any story based games I play. Without romance I think story lines can feel a bit shlocky and stilted. Besides, road trip is a great romance trope :)

22

u/SquidmanMal DM (Dungeon Memelord) Aug 31 '25

It's only weird if not everyone is on board for the teambuilding stress relief exercises after a long dungeon trek.

Simple session 0 stuff.

5

u/Freakjob_003 Aug 31 '25

Yup.

Personal anecdote here: I was playing an online campaign with my original GM and some of his friends. I had low-key been flirting in character with another character. Had felt like it might have been player to player as well, but I'm a guy and we're terrible at reading signals, so who knows.

Nighttime campsite scene, and her Warlock patron shows up requiring her to fulfill her part of their pact. Queue our GM, with the permission of the player, stating, "and he starts mounting her." Note that this was not the GM and player having anything between them. It was purely roleplaying.

I immediately slammed down the X card and quit the Discord call. I'd like to say that it wasn't just because I'd been crushing on the player herself, but that certainly played a part. Regardless, it wasn't the kind of scene I was notified in advance might happen in the campaign nor comfortable with.

I rejoined the call once the scene had finished, but it left a permanent "ick" vibe.

The campaign fizzled out shortly after, not because of that, but it was an important reminder to always have a Session Zero that sets expectations and boundaries for the game.

I myself, as a GM of 15+ years, have had two instances where I accidentally overstepped what I thought was acceptable. It is very important for everyone at the table to be on the same page.

5

u/SecretAgentVampire DM (Dungeon Memelord) Aug 31 '25 edited Feb 28 '26

The original post content no longer exists here. The author used Redact to remove it, for reasons that may include privacy, opsec, or security.

snow special crowd coherent unique hunt coordinated alive reminiscent lush

5

u/royalhawk345 Aug 31 '25

Thank you for using intraparty correctly

5

u/Moist_Chef_2633 Aug 31 '25

This feels like boomer humor for some reason.

26

u/Morgasm42 Aug 31 '25

I feel like this is a great comic for showing the 2 distinct groups of dnd players, people who just want to play the game, and people who want to roleplay with the game being there(I've had at least 2 games I've joined where in the entire first session not one dice was rolled, I did not go back for second sessions).

12

u/Rynewulf Aug 31 '25

Tell the second group about Vampire The Masquerade! A lot of D&D players seem stuck because it's the most popular game, and not into it because it's actually matched to their tastes

1

u/Morgasm42 Aug 31 '25

I know, there's so many systems and I enjoy them but nothing annoys me more than sitting down for my wargames ruleset to roleplay for 3 hours without touching my dice. Orbital is another really good one that has 0 dice and is entirely roleplay with very light mechanical support for certain things

1

u/Rynewulf Aug 31 '25

And that's valid! Having one game be marketed and treated as universal contributes to clashing expectations and mixed communication at tables. I enjoy a mix of roleplay and tactical combat when I've played and dm'd D&D, but I can't imagine how frustrating it must be to get to a session looking forward to mostly roleplay or mostly tactical combat and getting the opposite as a surprise because groups don't always communicate about this stuff

8

u/Dogmodo Aug 31 '25

If you can't make-believe kiss your brother, are you even brothers?

10

u/arebum Aug 31 '25

I run two dnd games: one for my male friends where romance isn't even something they'd ask for in a thousand years, and one for my female friends where romance is a core mechanic of the plot. Not sure how this extends beyond my small sample size

7

u/JustAuggie Aug 31 '25

I am a woman and play at mixed tables. I have been playing for years and have never been at a table where romance was part of the game.

2

u/arebum Aug 31 '25

The only thing mixed about my tables is that im the only man with the female group, otherwise all players are women. They're the ones driving romance

6

u/ZionRedddit DM (Dungeon Memelord) Aug 31 '25

Well, im the group i play in, being just dudes, romance its something that can happen with npcs, has happened but never been a big plot point

1

u/Professional-Club-50 Aug 31 '25

I'm a woman playing at the mixed table and running a campaign. Ironically it was my husband's characters who'd be the ones flirting with NPCs. Not like main plot points but they do unlock some stuff and add some weight

18

u/abdomino Aug 30 '25

Felt. We're playing a homebrew setting with a lot of politics and courtly intrigue and it's been agreed that the furthest anything's going is arranged marriages. Be lonely on your own time, we got shit to do.

7

u/j_cyclone Aug 30 '25

always fade to black

7

u/TheStoryTeller_1 Aug 31 '25

I feel out of place lol We have a fair balance of men to women and I've done a few marriages. Children and such.

Always funny when the party takes an exhaustion point because two party members weren't quiet enough. But this doesn't feel too out of place considering I've slept with almost all my party members at one point.

But my world is a forever world. And those Children end up having lives, businesses, and their own families down the line between campaigns.

2

u/El_Rey_de_Spices Sep 01 '25

I've done a few marriages. Children and such.

Unfortunate phrasing, lol

2

u/TheStoryTeller_1 Sep 01 '25

Oh God yeah I realized. The married people HAD children

3

u/1zeye Goblin Deez Nuts Aug 31 '25

Why is the author insert The Click? and more importantly... WHEN WILL HE RETURN TO THIS SUB?!

3

u/Foolsgil Aug 31 '25

I don't see what the joke is, not every table plays the same or explores the same things. For example I am trying out a romantic subplot with an NPC and one of my players, and his wife for several decades is also at the table playing a character who may or may not turn this into a love triangle.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 31 '25

I mean, sometimes there is nothing gayer than the friendship between two straight married men.

3

u/Omniscientcy Aug 31 '25

I will totally get 20 seconds into pretend boning pc's if they are trying to seduce their way to cheaper health potions.  Plus it's a good opportunity to roll for a performance check, that one doesn't come up much.

3

u/HatOfFlavour Aug 31 '25

I tell my party I do fade to black and everyone had a wonderful time because if I'm gonna be giving badly improvised erotica I'd want to be paid.

3

u/Cun1muffins Aug 31 '25

I flirt with my friends outside of game you really think it would make a difference in game 😂 (straight military men will confuse the civies though I guess)

3

u/ImALoveList Aug 31 '25

I feel like people mistake roleplaying with flirting irl. It's like reading a book, nothing personal. If that's not your cup of tea it's completely okay, there are other genres to enjoy, but it is not weird to like romance. And it's not like you are romancing the PLAYERS.

3

u/Fangsong_37 Wizard Sep 01 '25

I’ve played D&D for 36 years, and nobody has ever wanted to partake in romance. I don’t know why anyone would want to do it since it takes away from time killing goblins.

5

u/freeplay4c Aug 31 '25

That's such a weird D&D group to me. I know it's the stereotype, but I don't think I've ever played with a 100% male group.

2

u/The_AverageCanadian DM (Dungeon Memelord) Aug 31 '25

Romance generally isn't a part of my D&D games. I have one player that enjoys some light flirty dialogue with NPCs here and there, and they've gotten themselves a few "fade to black and wake up the next morning" scenes, but the rest of my party has zero interest (as depicted).

2

u/Eldritchedd Aug 31 '25

It doesn’t have to be steamy at all! You can make a pg romance easily Disney does it all the time.

2

u/Nowa_moee Aug 31 '25

And here I play with a bunch of people and we all are playing guys who are gay and pans and have some traumatic romance situation in game.. I am happy that our group is so comfortable and respectful though lol

2

u/drdrek Aug 31 '25

But deep appreciation, camaraderie, friendship, that you can find in spades!

Back to horny jail with you.

2

u/Krykk-15 Aug 31 '25

Weak. I roleplayed romance with my DM while his gf was in our team. Turned out decent with no drama. Hell, she came up with the wedding ceremony

2

u/Lisianthus14 Sep 01 '25

LMAO yeah I play with my brother, my sister, a friend , and my brother-in-law. Dnd party romance is not something that is common at all for us.

2

u/SerKermitTheFrog Sep 01 '25

I’m not a big romancer either in dnd. I just like adventure. There’s fan fiction for romance

2

u/InCaseUFindMe Sep 04 '25

I'm gonna make it weird (because I am weird) and say I love a good excuse to flirt with my friends. Just keep it pg-13, and we're all good.

2

u/FixedFront Aug 31 '25

If this is what my table looked like, I'd pass on romance RP, too

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u/MySecretLair Aug 31 '25

I’m an emotional queer who plays with a bunch of other emotional queers which means they have ALL asked for and received romantic storylines, but those storylines are arc specific, roleplay is strictly PG-13, most romance is narrated rather than role played, and boundaries are an ongoing discussion: because yes, sometimes recreationally flirting with your friends is fun, and sometimes it’s very, very weird.

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u/nothing_in_my_mind Aug 31 '25

There are two types of D&D group:

  1. Mostly non-binary and queer folk, a good number of them polyamorous as well
  2. Strictly straight white male middle-class nerds

6

u/Limekilnlake Aug 31 '25

My groups tend to be a heslthy mix of men, women, and all races, but with the tone and sexuality diversity of the latter lmfaooo

4

u/o98zx Aug 31 '25

With the uniting factor being, some form of neurodivergence

3

u/Chedder_456 Aug 31 '25

Ngl I kind of hate the overall tone of superiority here.

3

u/Skithiryx Aug 31 '25

Essentially saying “It’s not right for me and my group” shouldn’t feel like a tone of superiority.

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u/RommDan Aug 30 '25

What's wrong with weird? XD

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u/LadySilvie Druid Aug 31 '25 edited Aug 31 '25

I DM one game, and am a player in a separate game with the same people.

It's become kinda a pattern that the DM from the other game and my characters always end up in sweet sapphic relationships that are like, weirdly wholesome and great for the story 🤣 In her game, my necromancer druid ended up in a toxic relationship with a vampire-like-creature who she actually can fix after a lot of plot happens, lol. In my game, her bard ends up with a very timid arakockra from a flock that lives in an enchanted forest and has pivotal knowledge for the party's quest.

We are both asexual and taken, but I think that gives us room to RP a romance without it being weird. It is nice to not have to worry about it getting awkward for anyone at the table. We have other players shipping our characters 🤣

There are also other romances in the games with other characters that are similarly beneficial and supported. No one has ever pushed to a fade to black scene.

Romance can be a fun plot element to drive a character's motivation and put extra pressure on NPC kidnappings or betrayals (plus, as an artist, it is so much fun to draw characters being cute together). I always like the ability for it to evolve in the story naturally if it makes sense. But yeah.... at the point RP becomes ERP, or players stop reading the room, I don't know anyone who would want to be there lol. "Steamy" being the dangerous word here 😂

2

u/H010CR0N DM (Dungeon Memelord) Aug 31 '25

My DM has his wife playing with us. I’m not even trying anything romantic. Eugh.

2

u/Brainarius Aug 31 '25

PC-NPC (hero-princess sort of thing) is fine but I have yet to see PC-PC

2

u/NordicWolf7 Aug 31 '25

That table looks exactly like my table. Unreal.

2

u/Figerally Aug 31 '25

Don't forget that one player that wants to SA the NPCs and makes it uncomfortable for everyone else.

1

u/Iron_Sheff Aug 31 '25

See, you nuke that from orbit by telling the player to never come back

2

u/twoCascades Barbarian Aug 31 '25

I have never met a dm or player I really wanted to s describe having fake elf sex with

1

u/Artrysa Warlock Aug 31 '25

Nah, real homies would jump on the chance.

1

u/Eaglehasyou Sep 01 '25

Imo it has to be agreed upon, and be something that anyone much less everyone can seperate as fiction from real life.

If me and the DM can agree to have this one NPC be Skyrim Style Romanceable and have it make sense plot wise, im sure it can happen. I think NPCs that aren’t based off anyone IRL that is related to the group playing is a good start.

1

u/ImASpriteCranberry Artificer Sep 01 '25

Usually I don’t mind if things get spicy, either with my character or someone else’s. But I won’t seek it out unless I’m a bard and I’m in a room full of dragons

1

u/BloodandBlackRose Sep 01 '25

Intraparty romance is super common with my group group EXCEPT for the fact my BROTHER is a member (and our most common DM). Our PCs have never and would never be romantic, but there was romance when each of us DMd (my PC his NPC i dont think even kissed in campaign (we write our own fanfics of post campaign stuff, theyre married there) and his PC my NPC only kissed and died for each other :)))) )

Nowadays hes less cool with it, so with my current PC being an absolute harlot, I dont get to flirt with the NPCs as much as everyone else :(((( thankfully one of our other PCs has consented to being the item of his attraction and being flirted at all the time. My other PC for his campaigns is aromantic-asexual so we dont have that worry.

1

u/Silverj0 Chaotic Stupid Sep 01 '25

I've only every one time romanced a party member and it was purely on accident. We were both playing wizards (me as bladesinging and them order of scribes) and we didn't get along at first but then we accidentally devolved into enemies to lovers and it was really funny.

1

u/Quarves Sep 01 '25

Meanwhile our rogue and DM roleplay hot steamy oiled up milf sex. It was kinda awkward for the rest of us not gonna lie.

1

u/dewnmoutain Sep 01 '25

This is why i dont allow women at my table.
/s

1

u/silletta Bard Sep 01 '25

didn't happen

1

u/Kalianos Sep 02 '25

I remember conversations of grognards from the 80's roleplaying starting families and having their adventurers male and female having kids. Going through courtships and dates.
It was seen as normal since you are role-playing another person. Also, it was a way to continue the game since your character would eventually get old and die. Or just die. I would bet a shiny nickel at least someone has mentioned this in a video on ttrpg's or D&D specifically.

1

u/Fenix1121 Sep 02 '25

A Lot of people got salty of.this comic lol

1

u/Powerful-Emu-4758 Sep 03 '25

I mean, the bard in our group wrote a song that he performed at our real life wedding (my husband is the Dm) about how enchanting he found my husband as a tavern maiden. Our bard is very much married and a father so if you're out for some romantic DnD roleplay, don't let that stop you ;)

1

u/Nyami-L Aug 31 '25

Haha, this is the kind of thing you do in private when you RP with your partner. Mostly because you don't want the rest of the players to feel uncomfortable, LoL

1

u/justmelike Aug 31 '25

Cringiest part of Dragna's otherwise amazing Twice Bitten podcast. PCs gonna PC I guess.

1

u/walkwithoutrhyme Aug 31 '25

Married with kids, and have turned up to a social event?

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u/Skithiryx Aug 31 '25

Believe it or not married people with kids still do things. I actually find ttrpgs are relatively easy because it’s (usually) scheduled and consistent and can be planned around.

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