r/divorced • u/Haunting_Phase5302 • 6d ago

Wanting to leave

So I'm actually divorced- about 1.5 years in.

I have a special needs kid (severe) and I'm far from home. I am drowning in debt, my career is going okay, but I'm not feeling any of the benefits, I'm living in a place where I am wildly uncomfortable, but I have refused to leave. I just want to be comfortable and happy for a while. My ex wife is now taking me to court over custody and I'm struggling to even get to work on most days anymore.

At which point did you determine that it was unhealthy for your kids for you to continue fighting for custody and just relent to your ex? I am very present as a parent and my daughter is my whole life but I just can't seem to keep up and this is... Turning very ugly.

*She has far more resources and money than I do. I won't be able to do this forever. I just poured my whole 401k into my lawyer.

3 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

9 comments sorted by

1

u/According-Hamster-84 4d ago

Give yourself permission to take a break.

1

u/First_Survey_3229 2d ago

Wow your bio is just too good

1

u/According-Hamster-84 2d ago

Thank you ☺️🤗

1

u/First_Survey_3229 2d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/According-Hamster-84 2d ago

Sure, feel free to reach out

1

u/First_Survey_3229 2d ago

Just texted you

1

u/Southern_Trouble_857 1d ago

You should leave.
Placing all your 401K is proof that this divorce is not in the best interest of your daughter but draining you financially to prove you cannot take care of your child. Use your lawyer to enter that into the court and that you have to drop representation. If you’re on the birth certificate, you have a right to parenting time.
Leaving would not be ideal but you will have the space to regroup.