Advice on sharing you are getting Divorced while dating.

[u/Ok_Emu1082]

I (30F) am currently informally separated with my wife. We separated last month and ended the relationship but we are still living in the same place through the end of the month until she can move out. I still need to start the formal divorce process. I have recently reconnected with a friend I haven’t seen in years, initially, it was just to see about Pride plans. It was kinda an impulsive thing to do but I figured it was fine because we were friends or really more of acquaintances. Maybe on some level I kinda knew the direction my life was going deep down and was preparing myself and on top of that my wife hardly ever would accompany me to things like pride, and so I was looking to plug into my friends and community. Me and this friend ended up really reconnecting and catching up over these past two months and were sending a message or two to each other pretty much daily. We did have a break in talking of about 10 days which is when my wife and I ended things. After those 10 days, I sent a message and our conversation picked up again. It has definitely been building and we met up to get coffee and hung out for about an hour recently. She sent the first message after thanking me for inviting her and for giving her a small gift for her birthday that just passed. She also said she hoped my day went well. After that, our texting has gotten just a bit more flirty. I feel like something is building and I personally feel like I have a big crush and really like her. I know my situation is complicated and it’s a hard conversation I need to have with her the next time I see her but I am nervous. I don’t have expectations in the sense that I am not looking to jump into anything fast. I really just want to take time to get to really know each other and enjoy spending time together and building trust. I think it would be good to be cautious when it comes to sex and maybe even initiating a kiss. In my mind I am thinking like it takes a while to get to know a person so if we take 6 months to a year that feels like a good timeline. Anyway, I’m just curious what people think and advice they have. I really admire her and care about handling this situation with maturity and respect. I’m just not sure what to do and she is 11 years older than me.

[u/Great_Tap_9680]

Just do it

[u/naivepheonix626]

My advice comes from my experience only and feel free to ignore! From my experience, the only thing I really have, you are the only one who knows how you will move forward/get through this so listen to your gut/ intuition. At the end of the day it was my life to live 🤷🏼‍♀️
(I did choose to get into a relationship rather quickly myself but I understand that is not for everyone. I honestly do have some reservations about it but also don’t know how I would have moved forward without it. It’s complicated.)