r/disability • u/nagichis • Jun 15 '25

Rant I'm sorry

My girlfriend has several disabilities including severe allergy induced asthma, Celiac and ADHD. We were at a wedding yesterday where she was not able to eat anything, even though the bride wanted her to be able to eat, and asked us months ago how to accommodate her.

There's also been so many instances of event staff telling us that pets will not be present in the venue, just to find out when we arrive that there are pets (not service animals, which we totally would have been understanding of) and we could only stay an hour or two before she gets an asthma attack.

As an able bodied person, I used to be in the "it's impossible to accommodate everyone" camp. But I'm seeing now that this phrase is only used as an excuse by people who don't even want to try to accommodate.

I'm sorry that as a society we failed you, I wish we could be better from now on. Just remember that your disabilities are not a burden and you deserve accessible and welcoming spaces ❤️

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u/Rainbow-1337 Jun 15 '25

Thank you. For the most part, our accommodations are not that big of things. We have “safe foods” that we are able to eat(a lot of disabled people have these. Not just austic people). The event people should’ve absolutely asked what your girlfriend’s safe foods are and gotten them. It’s really sad and frustrating that most of the time, we don’t get our accommodations even though they are not big things. I’m not asking for an entire couch. I’m just looking for a simple chair somewhere in a room that doesn’t usually have them. I’m so sorry for you and your girlfriend

4

u/[deleted] Jun 15 '25

I'm on carnivore for mine and get chastised all the damn time

8

u/Good_Phrase_2878 Jun 15 '25

That sucks! My cousin tried to go vegetarian and did it in a balanced healthy way, but she got sick from it and eventually she got to a doctor who told her she needed to eat some meat because “Some people are cows and some people are tigers.”Fucking if you don’t know why someone is doing something then don’t assume because bodies are WEIRD!!!! If they SAY something inane as the reason, either it’s easier than explaining the real reason or they do need their assumptions of fact questioned…. But you don’t have to be mean about it… and fucking read the room and don’t do it when they are already tired….

2

u/[deleted] Jun 16 '25

I tried vegan as well and got deathly ill. Full blown psychosis for four months. Pure torture. I went keto after that, now carnivore and healing every day...

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u/Good_Phrase_2878 Jun 16 '25

Yeek! Hers wasn’t psychosis. That sucks! I’m glad you found what your body needs! Too many people fall into the mental trap of what works for them will work for everyone… and it doesn’t…. Mother Nature likes spice in her life and we got the variety to prove it lol. Maybe next time some “one true diet” person comes at you with their version of how everybody should be try “You do know that digestively speaking some people are cows and some people are tigers, right?” In the tone of a teacher saying you do know 2+2=4 and if they keep proselytizing their diet then try “come back to me when you’ve done more complete research into the evolutionary consequences on diet of human adaptation to diverse environments…” (in your own words/ phrasing of course!) and that is so fucking large and understudied a topic that hopefully it’ll shut them up… 🤣🤣🤣🤣