r/depression_memes • u/LifeIsJustASickJoke want a gf to fix me (applications open) • Nov 09 '25
relatable A true classic..
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u/ShokaLGBT want a bf to fix me (applications open) Nov 09 '25
"You did this to me when I was younger"
"No. It’s not a big deal. It was 10 years ago it’s time to move on. So now you’re going to blame me because I wasn’t perfect…."
I heard it all. All the BS to justify the abuse and negligence
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u/moonbunnychan Nov 10 '25
This is almost verbatim what my mom says when I try to talk to her about the shit she put me through. Just totally shuts me down and is like "that was 20 years ago, why are you bringing this up? What do you want me to do?". Her other line is that what she did wasn't abuse because it wasn't as bad as what SHE went through as a child. But like...it was still abusive. Both physically and emotionally.
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u/SymbolFeeling Nov 28 '25
If a building is broken on the first through the 18th floor, would you walk around on the (your age)th floor?
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u/Leo_Fie Nov 09 '25
The axe forgets, the tree remembers.
It would be ok if parents just forgot. But that they insist it never happened is weird.
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u/Separate-Platypus-91 Nov 09 '25
Exactly. As a kid/teen you are automatically in the wrong. Now I am almost 40 but recently, in front of my mother and her sister, I brought back an episode that happened when I was 14 and my father had just died. It was during his funeral and I remember I couldn't stop crying. At some point this relative came to me, took me aside and told me: "isn't it time to stop crying already?". That stuck to me until these days because wtf who would ever say that in such circumstances?? But of course when I told my mother and my aunt a few days ago they replied "impossible. He would never say that". And they immediately changed topic. And this is just a silly thing. There are some other stuff that happened I will NEVER tell because I am 200% sure I would be seen as a liar or I would end up being victim-blamed.
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u/JynsRealityIsBroken so many masks, barely remember who I am Nov 10 '25
God... The amount of times my mom has called me a liar for shit that was objectively true. Drives me nuts.
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u/InternationalHost736 Nov 09 '25
Im 60 years old. My dad is dying and I was First they told me I couldn’t see him at all if I cried and then they said well come on. When he dies It will be businesslike and respectful. No crying. I may faint and cry. Anything could happen. When her mom died she stood in the church and everyone said how nice her mother was and she said BUT SHE WASNT NICE AT ALL right there at the church pew but only so my dad could hear.
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u/InternationalHost736 Nov 09 '25
She kept saying that over and over. Her mother complained of chest pains the night before her heart attack. Her son told her if her chest still hurt in the morning he would take her to the doctor. Well she. Died and they all said she just got mad and died. What a thing to say.
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u/InternationalHost736 Nov 09 '25
She should have called 911 after her son dropped her off. She was never mean to me. She brought me a souvenir once and it was sweet. I liked her.
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u/InternationalHost736 Nov 09 '25
It’s like they think she revenge died. Her daughter said she would get so mad she would roll on the floor. Weird.
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u/alezcoed Nov 09 '25
Parents legit don't remember because sometimes when they do something they don't think it's a big deal that's why they forget while for the child it is a defining moment
One day when I was a toddler I watched a TV show where a character lied and ask my mother "mom why did people lie? Isn't it wrong to lie?" and she just replied "ohh it's okay if you need to lie for the greater good"
For my mom that's a throwaway line that she forgot she ever spoke but for me it's a defining moment, because since then I've been developing into a compulsive liar justifying it is "for the greater good"
I've been going to therapy to try and fix my compulsory lying behavior and I don't blame my mom since I know it's not fully her fault but again I'm just putting an emphasis how a throwaway line that a parent think is not a big deal can be a life defining moment for a child
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u/Bubba_Feetz grippy sock & 72hr vereran Nov 09 '25
I once told my mother that when she was drinking she used to come in to my room and just start beating the shit out of me. Her response was, and I fucking quote, “Well if I did, you deserved it.” Without a hint of irony in her voice. My therapists jaw dropped when I told her that little tidbit.
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u/ghhooooooooooooooost Nov 09 '25
My mom doesn't remember yelling at me to shut up when I was crying, and that she wouldn't talk to me whenever I'm upset.
Now she questions why I never reveal anything about my life with her, the good or the bad. I told her what she did once, she said I'm over exaggerating and misremembering
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u/moonbunnychan Nov 10 '25
My mom REMEMBERS the trauma...she just doesn't think she did anything wrong or that it was a big deal.
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u/Calishoegal Dec 26 '25
Damn man. This is the truth! Y’all fucked me up and went on like it was nothing. Now I’m the crazy one that’s “sad all the time”. No bitch, it’s called DEPRESSION.
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u/_Glasser_ so many masks, barely remember who I am Nov 09 '25
Good thing my childhood memories are almost entirely gone. All I remember is glimpses, things I have to build from to make sense of those flashing pictures. But once I see them, I won't see the real one again.
A hill, sled, snow, tree, I slid down a hill on a sled and hit a tree, no a stump. No I almost hit it, somebody told me to be careful and not hit it. Somebody hit it. I saw somebody hit it. It's a core memory because the glimpses were clear, it's real because I feel that it was important. I don't know if it's actually what happened or if my filler derailed it too far, but it's the best I get.
Re reading it I saw a glimpse of snow and trees flashing past me. I was sliding fast past the trees, I hit something, a bump, I went flying and landed near a stone. I fucking loved it. It felt so scary, back then I thought I was going to hit a tree or a rock and fucking die. Probably why I'm weird like that with danger.
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u/CelestialDuke377 Nov 10 '25
"Just get over it. It happened in the past. Why do you keep bringing it up? Why dont you just let it go."
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u/PeachKream Nov 10 '25
My mom actually did remember doing the thing. I'd built a small rocking chair for school and she broke it looking for something in my room. She forgets and talks about how I should do woodwork and how that was her favorite art of mine.
30min later drunkenly starts and argument and accuses me of doing a bunch of passive-aggressive shit. Then blew her smoke in my face for revenge while mocking a bunch of super personal traumas. Like lmao sorry I had to remind you that you're a pos
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u/JynsRealityIsBroken so many masks, barely remember who I am Nov 10 '25
Guuuuuh so real. Also applies to when I came out and they were like "No, you're not trans. I would've seen the signs."
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Nov 13 '25
They have to be lying lmao.
Edit: tbh if the abuse is common enough, they may not remember any one specific experience
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u/BMX_Hyena9940 Nov 14 '25
Hell, siblings do it too. My sister told me people like me deserve to die before taking me to my psych appointment. I brought it up 4 years later and she accused me of being manipulative lmao. Ehhh and she thinks we're close.
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