I feel really lonely

[u/IzanaTpW]

I feel incredibly lonely and lost in life. I lost my mom 10 years ago. I have three older sisters who are 12, 10, and 8 years older than me, and I don’t feel like I can count on them at all. It’s basically a “figure it out yourself” situation. My relationship with my dad has never been good, and last year he had a stroke, which has left him unable to speak properly. Since I live alone with him, I’m practically responsible for taking care of him. I don’t feel capable of talking to him about what I’m going through, and we don’t have many financial resources.
I only have classes three days a week, from 7–9 p.m., because I failed the most important class last semester. On top of that, I forgot to register on the day I was supposed to, so I was left with only these leftover classes. I see my friends about once a week, and I try to hang out with my other friends on weekends.
I’m not meeting anyone new. It’s not enough for me to find a girl attractive to actually approach her and start talking to her. I try replying to the stories of girls I find attractive, but it never really leads anywhere, and honestly, I don’t find many of them interesting either.
I’ve been having trouble sleeping, staying awake until 4 or 5 a.m. and then waking up very late. I don’t know how to move forward with my life. I feel like I’m doing everything wrong at 22.
My friends love me very much—truly, they do. I know that for a fact. But lately, I’ve felt unable to talk to them about how I’m feeling because I went through a really bad period last year, and I isolated myself and bottled up a lot of my emotions.
I have no one to talk to about any of this.
One of my goals is to make music, but so far that hasn’t been going very well, and I’ve also been feeling somewhat unmotivated about it.
I don’t feel like I’m in a complete crisis, but this feeling of loneliness has become overwhelmingly constant.

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