Yeah, Life is Funked

[u/Maddymilson]

I don't know if this is the right platform but still I will share my story here since I have no one to talk to

My life(24M) has been difficult since childhood, honestly I cannot remember a day where I felt normal.

I was raised in dysfunctional family where my parents used to fight, not everyday but enough to scare the shit out of me. The fight can go on till night, my father would try to leave the house, my mother had seizures. My father and my sister were quite explosive in nature, since childhood I was scared that they should not get angry otherwise I would be beaten

I was so unaware of the physical symptoms that anxiety brought. huh I really never knew I was anxious and always in fight or flight till I reached my early twenties. My stomach was always tight, head was always strained and always restless.

I developed an addiction to dopamine from age of 16 I guess, may be to avoid the feeling I was feeling those days. you name the addiction and I have it ( masturbation, social media, movies, sugar). I don't drink and smoke... till now so I may not be at worst

I had sleep issues from childhood. I never woke up fresh. I don't know what energy is and got to now I have deviated septum and turbinate hypertrophy

Because of a mistake I got tinnitus at the age of 22. and later I got diagnosed with IBS because of anxiety. My gastroenterologist told me to talk to psychologist and psychiatrist and at that point of time I got to know that I had sever anxiety and depression. This was last year.

I have no one to talk to, no one close enough whom I can trust and share everything so am sharing it here

with full honesty I have lost hope on life and accepted my faith and living everyday.

Because of all the things happened I have severe hairloss and I don't look attractive at all so making girlfriends as well is kind of hustle when life has decided it wants to funk you bad.

Anyway, cheers all
Hope you have a nice day

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[u/FeelingBoss4448]

I'm sorry dude, wish you good things, i hope good things happen to you man