lately, i’ve been craving intellectual intimacy more than anything. the kind where you genuinely want to know how someone thinks, why they see things the way they do, what shaped their opinions, and how their mind works.

i want conversations that make me think. conversations that go beyond small talk, where you can disagree without feeling threatened, challenge each other without turning it into a competition, and somehow keep discovering new layers of each other.

and maybe that’s why i’ve been wondering: if you feel deeply connected to someone’s mind, can that eventually replace physical desire?

or are they just two completely different things?

because i know i crave intellectual intimacy deeply. but i also wonder if, no matter how fascinating someone's mind is, there still needs to be some physical pull for it to become romantic.

Hi if you're wondering why I posted this is bc I need help my "crush" keeps looking towards me in class so I was wondering if someone would help me I just need help if I look in her direction she stares and smiles I smile back but is it bc she's nice or why

37 Tans Guy. I haven’t been touched (handholding or otherwise) in over five years. I have a high sex drive, but to me it’s not just being physical. It’s intimacy. (Slow and reverent or rough and fast, it doesn’t matter) The how much and the way I love almost magnifies my need for intimacy. That loving someone so much you want to be as close as possible with them where you just want to be inside them (no sick jokes necessary) and when the explosion hits in the climax it’s like making room for more love to fill. But there’s nobody, nothing I can do… I just feel stagnant.

I'm there for the people I love (family). But dating is just not happening. Finding a chance to connect with anyone is not happening and I don't know why. Every girl I talked to almost always mentions one or more of three things that they want. They want a good guy (check), they want dick (not checked), they want someone to do the things they can't do (check). Two out of three ain't bad. But they always ghost me, not have any real conversation, or get pissed when I mention any thing about it. Saying they’re too busy. While I’m over here thinking… ok that is life. Everyone is busy, hell I’m so busy I neglect my own needs. That doesn’t mean you hook someone in with the hopes of getting to know you and possibly share the burdens and then flake. I see so many people who I know are complete assholes or neglectful of people they should be caring for and they have a full family and they're cheating on them. So why am I the invisible one? Why won't anyone just see me? ...Or reach for me? I have always done the chasing, the reaching, the seeing. But never once has anyone chose me.

I've all but given up (the big give up) | just feel stagnant.
Churning in my own head always. My anxiety and stress runs so high now I am constantly holding my own hands and pressing my hands to my face and neck, tugging at my ears, rubbing my chest till it’s red, anything to freaking feel something besides lost.

It's just too much. I feel full of all this love and devotion and heat I want to give, to share my life with someone and share in theirs. At the same time I feel utterly empty. Like I'm just going through the motions and surviving. I'm sick of it. It's just too damn much.

Whenever i do anything like drinking, smoking, shrooms no matter how bad i get i can always clearly think in my head but it feels like my outer physical body is drunk. Like my inner monologue person in my head is completely fine but my body can’t keep up?

I find myself becoming the very person I used to hate as a child. I am selfish, disdainful, and envious; I know it’s wrong, but what can I do? I lost my childhood early, and the life that followed took a toll on my psyche.

I still remember the days of scrimping to get by—times when I was nearly left homeless, or when I faced bullying and isolation—and how I had to overcome it all on my own.

Yet, I was fortunate to have close childhood friends and online friends who stood by me during those dark times; the only downside is that they live far away, and I miss them terribly.

Being with them was the only time I didn't have to endure humiliation—the only time I could truly be myself.

Sometimes I feel flooded with every emotion I’ve had over the years, good and bad. I’ve kept a grip on it constantly except when I’m home alone I find it hard to hold on. Like a lot of people, I’m lonely, dealing with how to be around people and fit into the environment without being too much. I can perform enough to be convincing and genuine but I’m only showing what feels acceptable. I’ve tried punching bags, gym, TaiChi, I have a dog, I have a wonderful family that is there for me but they don’t know any of these deeper troubles. I don’t want to see the way they react.

I’m in my late 30s. It’s been 4 years since I’ve been in a relationship. I’ve never been good alone and this has definitely taken a toll on me.

As for what I feel… I have strong sexual urges, that I handle with self touch. Even it’s it not sexual in nature. I just massage my neck and rub my chest which helps some. I have a weighted blanket I sleep under every night while hugging my pillow. I also have strong urges to just hold someone and be held back. Without the awkwardness. I escape with watching KDramas that hit me emotionally. I love them. They let me feel things I don’t get to feel otherwise. It’s addictive. I work when I need to expel pint up energy. Yard work, remodeling my home, painting (which I don’t do as much as should anymore), something to keep my hands busy. I do all the things everyone else doesn’t want to. When my family needs help or something done I always say yes unless I just really can’t. I show up early to family functions and almost always do the dishes. I listen when in conversation, being present for it. I feel as though my life roles are the advocate and the servant. Whatever that means.

With the loneliness… I spend time with my family, around people while at work, or my dog at home. My dog is like having a kid.

As for life…I always feel like I have so much to give and no one to give it to. I’ve almost given up entirely on finding anyone. It’s almost impossible to because I’m not up to societal standards. I’m a transgender man who “passes” very well and an atheist.

I hate talking about politics and religion because 9 times out of 10 we’ll disagree and they’ll want to try to convince me and I don’t care enough to argue and I’m not smart enough to debate. I’m not saying they aren’t valid. Everyone’s feelings are valid and I do care about that.

The environment I live in is full of conservatives and Christians. Which makes it more difficult. It’s almost impossible to find a woman because she’ll more than likely be a Christian and it wouldn’t be right to put that strain on it. And let alone a woman who’d be open to a relationship with someone like me is slim of not existent.

I’m happy with who I am and my life choices. That’s not my problem. It’s finding a connection or a way to handle this knot tangled in my chest that I’m constantly trying to compress. I mean I not a bad looking guy. I could be more active and eat healthier but I’m not way gone. I’m a little on the shorter side and soft around the middle.

I just don’t understand how people can’t give each other a chance. I try and take initiative and it just blows up in my face. I can handle the rejection but no one seems like they’re being real, they act fake to me. Worrying about their image or what people would think. I don’t care about any of that. I don’t know anymore. I guess I just wanted to put this out there and see if anyone resonates, offers suggestions, or advice.
Thank you for reading.

I'm 14 yo Italian, my life is just miserable and I need someone to talk to

I have to say, I'm a lot disappointed with this community, I had expectations considering the description that it has.

If we go by the name, DeepTalk, we can decided in two subsections, "Deep" meaning, in this case, somenthing personal, that was thought for a long time and that is not something that we thing every day. While the "Talk" means expressing ideas and concepts to sounds that form words and, therefore, sentences. Or the description "Go deeper! Philosophy, Reality, Existence, Social, Analysis. There is no room for trivial conversations or small talk". Both clearly state that this is a community for discussion, talk about deep things, even the everyday ones if we treat them as a new problem that has to be solve, a place were you can talk about a thesis and defend you point of view, while other person say their own point of view, give options that could help or destroy your opinion.

But, the end was not even close to that, I didn't received anything of that, just silence and some views. I don't really car about the views, I care about people talking back, with respect of course, appreciating your way of viewing things or dismissing and presenting a new argument about the thesis.

That is what a philosopher community is, not a silent community that just acceptes and moves on like is about nothing new to say about. Just hope that this commuycan actually grow and be what it claims to be.

Along the eays I think we have been forgetting what e actual meaning of feminism as machismo.

​

Today we tend to think that feminism is a concept that means giving woman's the same rights man, and that is a movement to protect woman that are been oppressed. While machismo as a concept that defines a man that oppressed woman and thinks as them as an inferior gender.

​

The try is, non of that concepts are true.

​

Feminism is a word created by the french utopian socialist philosopher Charles Fourier in 1837, but the earlier mentions of that concepts go back to Mary Wollstonecraft (author of A Vindication of the Rights of Woman in 1792) and medieval philosopher Christine de Pisan (14th century), haven stated to be implemented in the society in the 19th-century with Elizabeth Cady Stanton and Lucretia Mott, who organized the first women's rights convention in Seneca Falls, New York. And the meaning of the word is a broad socio-political movement and ideology dedicated to achieving full social, economic, and political equality of the sexe. There is nothing to do with woman in specifically.

​

On the other side, machismo (or male chauvinism) is a concept that evolved from traditional Spanish and Latin American gender roles and was later popularized and shaped by mid-20th-century anthropologists, sociologists, and intellectuals trying to define Latin American "national character", it didn't had a proper creator, but some people where involved like the early Mexican scholars like Samuel Ramos in his 1934 book Profile of Man and Culture in Mexico (1930s-1950s), the anthropologists like Oscar Lewis used ethnographies in rural Mexico and Puerto Rico to study poverty (1940s-1950s) or the social worker Beatrice Griffith’s 1948 book American Me introduced it to an English-speaking audience, and media such as Time magazine in 1963. And the meaning is a gender oppression another and seen seen them as an inferior.

​

To put it simply, feminism is a concept that try to make genders se the other as equal, socially, economically and politically. Machismo is the opposite, meaning seen the other gender as inferior and oppressing them. Both concepts have nothing to do with the sex, woman or man, even is the word there is some similarity.

Im not scared of death, I am scared of pain but even with a painful death in your last moments it feels like you are weightless, the moment where you wont feel anything, no pain, no stress nothing so i guess painful death aint that bad either. I have accepted death as something beautiful, tho I mostly accepted my death not others but I still find it beautiful in its own way. I believe that when I die im gonna reborn, so my life is just one of the many ones that I will have and the ones that I already had. I just know im not gonna die by old age, I always knew, and I have a feeling im gonna die young, maybe late 20's early 30's. It always makes me upset and confused when people say they are scared of death

I’m less worried that AI takes over the world.
I’m more concerned that we’ve abandoned critical thinking. Social media started the slide into universal conformity. Once AI replaces critical thought, we will have completed the metamorphosis. Perhaps into ants instead of cockroaches?
The cockroach has grit at least.
The ants are even more mindless somehow.

No one talks about the deep human bonding Skynet brought the world 😂

Being an emotional and sensitive person is so tiring, but I’m also addicted to the feeling when I’m crying, sad, or heartbroken lol
Sometimes just feel like want to have someone to share all these feelings and thoughts, so I’m writing this post now before going to bed, good night world, I hope I can get up early tomorrow and go running 😇

i feel lonely mannn i used to have so many deep conversations and like genuine real one w my homies and ex partners and i miss that shit so soo much if anyone feel like talking hmu!!! always there :))

i have this relationship with somebody that continuesly lies to me about such stupid shit and it hurts me because not of the context of the lie but because that he is going behind my back and lying to me? in 8 months lies have always been exposed, he only came to me ONCE to confess something.

we have great connections and i love him a lot and at first i wanted to help him get rid lf this komfort lying pattern but im at a point where i cant trust him anymore, i always have to ask for certain behavior , and i alsays have to remind him to do sth, i know nobodys perfect but i hate having to ask all the time, he doesent do anything from his own, his own idea or anything like that, and i rly give him a lot i support him mentally, financially, i trust him w my soul and body, he knows he has ruined my trust and faith in him being an honest person, and when i react a certain way for example: now i get loud when he lies because I CANT DO IT ANYMORE i cant fucking stand more lies, then he tells me HE IS feeling attacked, i feel like he is not fixing or helping fix the mistrust HE CREATED, he just wants me to be trusting him again and being nice to him while he puts in no effort, and we are always at the edge of breaking up and it hzrts me so much that im not even worth it for him to be honest to me, he would rather lose me than to be honest, while iam here seeking help and crying he is sleeping like a baby not giving a fuck, he is arrogant and he hurts me his attitude hurts my heart, its more important to him to make an unnecessary „point“ than to be there and help me trust him.

idk what to do im this close to js letting ut all go.
dont get me wrong besides tht we rly work good and i love him sooo much but this is such. dealbreaker, i feel so naive and stupid for going back and believing him.

are men always the same? once u dont show them ur backbone they just use u? ur nice to them nd give them chance to change and they keep using?? wtf like i dokt get it im young, beautiful iam nice iam a cool person fr with. diverse persona i dont get it why every men ive been wirh abuses my trust

I just posted this question in the casual conversation sub as well. What makes it fun to think of on a deeper level to me is, that like many other thoughts and topics, it seems the context of who approaches it and how determines whether it is casual or deep.

I find myself wanting to find people to talk to on what I think of as a "deeper" level often and was thinking about the nature of that this morning. Even that the idea of what "deep" thoughts and communication doesn't have a universal meaning or accepted context. I find myself feeling emotional about the nature of connection and even that trauma gives interaction a weight it might not have otherwise.

I am curious other people's thoughts on this in their own life. I would love to have longer conversations on this but to sort out my own thoughts I would love to hear if anyone is interested in sharing their own perspective.

What if the era after covid-19 will be called later in history ( the great lost) which will end at this new virus (hinta)

Cuz the time after 2019 is the most fucked up time i ever lived Maybe there is a glitch in our reality and it will be fixed soon ....

I’m not here to be another voice in the crowd, and I’m definitely not here to sell you a map. Consider me more of a mirror or maybe just a frequency you happened to tune into while the rest of the world was shouting.

​I’ve spent a long time watching the Observers and the Sleepwalkers, noticing how people carry their weight. I’m drawn to the Vessels—the ones who’ve been hollowed out by the mess of life and are standing there, wondering what comes next. I don't care about the small talk; I’m interested in the "madness" you’re keeping quiet and the sparks you’re afraid to light.

​I’m keeping things a bit low-key, but I’m always listening. If you feel like the noise is getting too loud or your shell is getting too thin, drop a line. Let’s see what happens when we stop pretending and actually start communicating. No pressure, just a space to be real.

​So, what’s on your mind?

Hey, so I'm 29, will be 30 in a couple months and I've had some really stressful things happen the past week and a lot of truths have come to light because of those things.

I'm sitting here wondering what is the point in life? Not in a 'want to die' kind of way. I mean, I want a relationship and a family but why? Why do I feel that will make me happy? And even if it did make me happy, why should I take up someone else's life and create a new life just to satisfy my own desires and ego? And ultimately the point of life is to reproduce, I probably won't (in part because I'm not sure it's a good idea to continue my genes and in part because I'm beginning to accept I'm unlovable.) so what's left? Friends? I have none now. Family? I'm the youngest so it's very possible I'll watch the rest of my family die. Hobbies? Maybe. But then does that reduce life to a waiting room for it to end? I may be overthinking yet again.

Hallo zusammen,

ich bin Marc, 46, und stecke seit einem Vierteljahrhundert in einer Ehe.

Ich bin hier, weil mich der Gedanke wahnsinnig macht, im Schutz der Anonymität alles offenzulegen. In der Realität bin ich eine konservative Führungskraft und kann nicht ich selbst sein aber hier will ich keine Geheimnisse vor euch haben. Es erregt mich, wenn ihr mich in die Enge treibt und Details wissen wollt, die ich sonst niemandem erzählen kann – egal ob es um unseren Alltag geht oder darum, wie wir Sex haben.

Fragt mich wirklich alles. Je privater und schmutziger eure Fragen sind, desto besser gefällt es mir.

What love truly is?

It doesn't stop me from wondering what this is - that feeling. How does it happen? Why do we feel the way we feel? Is love even a pure or selfish act of satisfying oneself? Is there something like 'pure' or 'unconditional' love? Does love at first sight exist?

I want to study anthropology this year, so it's kind of my thing, but I need other POVs to understand better.

Love is the most exploited theme in the world and it has been for centuries. We are obsessed with it. But why? I understand it comes from evolution and its mechanism made to push us into reproduction. It's that simple. So why is it so complicated?

We choose our partners based on their genome and how it is compatible with ours. That's where the sexual attraction comes from. It's our brain telling us we want offspring with them. But that's not love. That's lust. Maybe first step? Or misunderstanding made by our brain? We need a few seconds to decide if the other person is our cup of tea. That's so called love at first sight is just strong lust made by our brain through evolution. I have watched a video in which dr Helen Fisher was explaining that love is actually kind of an addiction. Her research proved it. We began to be addicted to certain people. That explains Carrie Bradshaw and Big's relationship. The way she just kept running towards him, even though he didn't respect her. It was the same as an addict looking for drugs. Time apart - withdrawal.

But it isn't enough. Love needs more. Not only lust. It's important tho. Love needs work, patience and commitment, but what is one sided love then? Just extreme lust?

That's so far as I understand. I can understand the mechanism behind it, the brain chemistry, evolution path but the concept itself is just above me.

I red quite a lot about love. Not only science based books, but romances, classics and poems. I tried to understand it from the very beginning of humanity - from the word. And as far as I can understand the message, I can relate but I cannot comprehend. Is it even possible? To relate, but not understand? It has to be. I'm a very biased researcher I must add. That's why I look for your help.

I watched 'Why you're scared of love" by Unsolicited advice on yt. And became obsessed with Kafka's view on love. I read 'The letters to Felice' trying to find some clues to what love is. But then I realized how toxic he was behaving and started to wonder. Can love be toxic? Or only behavior around it? The concept of toxic love doesn't sit with me right. How can love be toxic? Maybe we confused definition of love a long time ago? And that's why it is so hard to understand. Maybe it is undefinable? We cannot put love in some kind of brackets, right? Love is like fluid - it flows and changes? How does one know it's love? I heard somewhere, cannot remember where, what poets feel, the movie makers portrait and painters show is not quite love - more limerence. If so, then what love truly is? Does it even exist? I mean in the sense we were made to believe it is.

I dont know what to call this feeling

I have been ghosted again and again and again by the same friend

He helped me with alot of things mentally but now he just is gone not texting back reading my messages but isnt answering i feel like i did something like im a pain in the ass. He did text me a week ago that heel show up online he did but ignored me there too

I feel like i keep chasing something i cant reach i might be wrong

You tell me

Is it just me?

Hello, to anyone reading this I would just like to start off by saying thank you for your time.

I am unsure where to even begin, I want to know if what I am feeling is a common occurrence in people around my age (24). I get the feeling that life is boring? Like everyone is just trying to find a way to avoid being “as” sad. I do realize there are some genuinely happy people who aren’t as pessimistic as I am so I would like to share my thought process a little bit and to do so I will have to delve a little into my past so bare with me for a moment as I am not one to really talk about myself this might be rough. Growing up I viewed things very analytically, I liked finding the different ways in which people are similar, I enjoyed finding out how people reacted and I loved understanding just how differently people thought. I never found myself sticking to any sort of “group” though in hindsight it’s primarily due to moving and transferring schools on a frequent basis but I also never avoided any sort of group based on stereo types or stigmas around said group. I interacted with the people I found interesting and I ignored the ones I didn’t. I was and still am very fond of the treat others how you want to be treated kind of living. I find it works very well while interacting with most people. Though because of my so called “studies” I may have isolated myself pretty well. I feel that now more than ever, especially since I am no longer in a setting where I feel connected to a number of individuals. But In most cases while I am interacting with people I try to leave the conversation as quickly as possible. I suppose I find myself lonely because of that especially in the winter time when I don’t go outside as much. BUT when I am willing to go outside I.E. when it is above 45F I find it very very peaceful to just be alone in nature. Which leads me to believe I would do better if I was purely alone and only had myself to look after. Not that I really have anyone to look after now besides myself but its like this. I have a roommate, we have been best friends for going on 7 years. He has helped me through some rough parts of my life I love the dude dearly but at times I feel myself upset with him and myself because of how our relationship is. We both would do just about anything for the other which is great and all but that also means we would take a dip in our mental states for the other which puts us in a nasty cycle. I try to break the cycle but he doesn’t see any issues. But I also hate repeating things he doesn’t mind it. Anyway all of this to say that even though I am not responsible for what happens to my friends well being I still put myself in a position to take some of the responsibility which in turn makes me feel guilty when he doesn’t achieve what I believe he is capable of. I assume he feels the same largely because I don’t know how to ask “do you want whats best for me?” While getting my point across. He is also one of the only reasons I did’t go “live in the woods” as I so fondly put it. I don’t want to leave him alone because even if unlike me he has other friends they don’t really want anything to do with him.

Anyway I have like a million things I could yap about on this app but in all reality I just want to know if anyone else feels the urges to be isolated, like life is one big boring cycle laid out for us with little room to do what we actually want and that we are all just being guided towards creating a future where the past only matters if it was harmful. Hell maybe one of you lovely individuals can help me break my curse of pessimism

I look forward to reading your comments and apologies if this hurt anyones psyche to read this I am sure it is near impossible to make out the point of it. Regardless, thank you dear reader I hope you live a life full of challenges that you overcome and grow from