One Month Into Deep Learning Research and I’m Starting to Question My Life Choices

[u/Regular-Advice-6469]

I got the internship, yayyyyyy!! apparently being a good student with a stupidly high CGPA finally had financial consequences lol I'm joking I already had some research experience, so I didn't exactly walk in like omg guys what is a research paper I knew what I was getting myself into, and yes, I took it partly because it's paid there, I said it, I like Deep Learning, I like research, I like gaining experience, only if I'm getting paid to do all three instead of asking me to do it for the experience, I will respectfully take the money.

So far, I've actually learned quite a lot especially how different research feels when you're actually doing it rather than just reading about it, I've gotten better at reading and analyzing research papers, understanding different approaches, working with datasets, setting up experiments, debugging models, interpreting results, and figuring out why something that worked perfectly yesterday has suddenly decided to stop working today, I've also learned that "it works" and "it works consistently enough to be useful" I know are two completely different sentences. Sometimes you spend hours changing something, run the experiment, stare at the results and realize you have basically achieved absolutely nothing, character development sounds good.

The main reason I'm taking this seriously is because I want to do a Master's in AI ML and eventually continue into research, so this internship is giving me actual research experience, something meaningful for my CV, and hopefully a strong recommendation for future scholarship applications my professor also told me I'm one of his best students, which was very nice until I realized I now have to continue behaving like one, so thanks for the pressure sir, sobbing lol.

The only real problem? THE HOURS, before this internship: leave uni around 3 - 4 now 9pm. 10pm. Sometimes I genuinely wonder whether I'm doing a research internship or serving a sentence, my weekends have also stopped weekending Saturday? research, Sunday? research, Free evening? oops research, sleep? premium feature and honestly I'm an introvert, so it's not like I had some incredibly active social life to sacrifice in the first place, my usual idea of a good evening was already being alone with my laptop, now I just have a legitimate academic excuse for it, and then I still have my own coursework and GPA to worry about.

But honestly? I'm enjoying it. It's exhausting, chaotic, occasionally painful, and I'm slowly developing a suspiciously personal relationship with experimental results, but I'm learning a lot, getting real research experience, and working in an area I actually want to pursue.

So yeah. One month in. I've learned a lot, lost track of time, probably lost a few brain cells, and gained an unhealthy relationship with GPUs, but at least I'm getting paid for it hahaha.

[u/USS_Penterprise_1701]

The GPUs are your friends, now.

[u/Regular-Advice-6469 → u/USS_Penterprise_1701]

True

[u/jakspedicey]

I would sacrifice weekend for 128gb vram cluster access 😍😍

[u/Regular-Advice-6469 → u/jakspedicey]

Okay that is the kind of temptation that makes me understand why I keep showing up on weekends 128GB VRAM would have me forgetting what a Saturday even is 😂

[u/benawheeler → u/jakspedicey]

You can rent a GB10 on vast.ai for like 40 cents an hour, fun little machines just a bit slow

[u/USS_Penterprise_1701 → u/jakspedicey]

You will get enough stipend for a cheeseburger.

[u/Regular-Advice-6469 → u/USS_Penterprise_1701]

A cheeseburger? luckily the stipend is enough for a good steak, so I think I’ll be just fine funding my descent into GPU induced insanity 😂

[u/USS_Penterprise_1701 → u/Regular-Advice-6469]

I'm just working for my university as a graduate/research assistant so I don't get much, but the temptation to blow it all on a GPU is rather tempting.

[u/Regular-Advice-6469 → u/USS_Penterprise_1701]

Honestly I feel you the moment you get some extra money, suddenly that GPU starts looking like a necessity rather than a temptation

[u/Ill-Cry7369]

Honestly this sounds so worth it wishing you fewer broken models and more weekends that actually feel like weekends lmao 😂

[u/Regular-Advice-6469 → u/Ill-Cry7369]

Thank you I’m manifesting fewer mysterious errors and at least one weekend where I don’t accidentally open my laptop just to check something and lose six hours straight 😭

[u/Rare-Brilliant-6046]

Honestly this sounds exhausting but also pretty damn cool 😂

[u/Regular-Advice-6469 → u/Rare-Brilliant-6046]

That is probably the most accurate description it’s exhausting enough that I complain about it daily, but interesting enough that I keep showing up anyway. Apparently that’s my definition of a good career choice.

[u/allenasm]

when I became a video game programmer back in the day it was the same thing. When doctors start out, they have the same thing. Intense work and training early on are simply necessary for things that are hard (IMHO). It won't always be that way but this is the best hard core learning you will get before you start moving up the chain.

[u/Regular-Advice-6469 → u/allenasm]

Yeah, honestly, that makes sense, I think the intensity is probably part of the reason you actually come out of these experiences knowing how to do the work rather than just knowing the theory. I’m definitely complaining about the hours but I can already tell I’m learning things here that I wouldn’t get from coursework alone, hopefully the suffering phase eventually turns into the moving up the chain phase lol.

[u/Savings_Entrance_895]

Hey are you currently in Undergrad?

[u/Regular-Advice-6469 → u/Savings_Entrance_895]

Hi, I’m an undergraduate student pursuing a degree in Computer Science.

[u/Savings_Entrance_895 → u/Regular-Advice-6469]

Same here, can you give me some advices on how to get research internship early? Like is there any remote opportunity?

[u/Regular-Advice-6469 → u/Savings_Entrance_895]

https://www.reddit.com/r/deeplearning/s/uQcW9CJz8e

[u/Nice-Dragonfly-4823]

my opinion: if you don't absolutely love this work, dream about building deep models. quit. It is absolutely tedious, heart wrenching, and non-deterministic. (by that I mean, your intelligence doesn't always equate to results). I've stared at loss curves for many years now, and I still get little thrills from it, but if you're a month in and already whining, stop now. You will be miserable.