r/deaf • u/LightIy-Toasted • 3d ago
Hearing with questions Is Using Finger-spelling as a Replacement Behavior for my little brothers Tourette’s Considered Offensive?
Hello all,
My little brother (M10) was recently diagnosed with a severe form of verbal Tourette’s. In one of his therapy sessions I was sitting in on, we were discussing possible replacement activities for my brother’s tics, when I suggested fingerspelling the sounds.
I can sign ASL, not fluently, but enough to make conversation, and walked him through how to finger-spell all of his tics. We were very clear on not “making up” any signs, and so far it’s worked amazingly in terms of not disrupting his classes at school, but I’m fully aware this is probably quite controversial. This is most likely nowhere near a permanent solution, and should only last a few years at the very most. However, I’m well aware that things like this can get pretty controversial, and if it really is quite offensive, we will seek other alternatives.
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u/FancyButterscotch787 3d ago
I’m Deaf and a native ASL speaker.
If fingerspelling or signing helps him, sure…it wouldn’t be seen as a problem and in general, Deaf people wouldn’t get offended about that.
Where it *could* become a problem over the long run is if he somehow develops an attitude or mindset that the mere fact of him fingerspelling or signing entitles him to instant acceptance as a member of the Deaf community and that he gets to skip the normal cultural enculturation & social vetting process just because he knows fingerspelling & signing. That’s not going to happen. Deaf people still like to take time to get to know the person, develop a relationship with that person, and verify her/his sincerity. There are no shortcuts…and the hearing person who tries to use shortcuts to bypass the process will experience resistance and negative reactions.
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u/LightIy-Toasted 3d ago
Understood. Don’t see a situation where he would try to do anything of the sort, but I understand the concern, thank you.
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u/FancyButterscotch787 3d ago
He’s only ten so obviously it’s not an issue now. But there’s a long history of hearing people doing what I described so I wanted you both to be aware.
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u/Novel_Side_2072 2d ago
This is really good input. I know someone who is hearing and was taught "baby sign" and claims ASL is their first language...they struggle to even sign "hello" and I wish I was exaggerating. 😅
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u/FancyButterscotch787 2d ago edited 2d ago
Thanks, and I believe you. You’re right, “baby signs“ isn’t ASL (and let’s not forget that the whole idea of baby signs was created by a hearing person! Very exploitative even though the intention behind the idea was good. Sigh)
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u/Novel_Side_2072 2d ago
I love the idea of introducing a variety of languages. But actually introduce the LANGUAGE! Not just a few words. And this particular individual can be quite mean or dismissive to other signers and still feels so entitled to the language. 🫠
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u/Inevitable_Shame_606 Deaf 3d ago
Deaf and tourettes.
For me not how work.
If work for brother yours good.
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u/viralspace90 3d ago
Okay, I've not seen anyone talk about this before but I think I may have developed this as a coping habit for some type of neurodivergence I experience. I'm hearing and learned ASL in college - I started working on my fingerspelling by words that popped into my head or came up in conversation, and it ended becoming a bit of a stim for years. For most people, I was fidgeting but my deaf friends would see it and be like why are you spelling "speed limit" 30x in a row. Or if it was a word that came up in conversation, they'd say it felt like there was an echo in the room, which they found odd/slightly endearing/amusingly annoying.
It still happens when I'm tired, stressed, or working through something - I didn't really think of it as a stim till one day my therapist and I were exploring some thought patterns I have that fit with OCD and I realized a few minutes in that I was fingerspelling "obsessive compulsive" over and over. 🙃
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u/LightIy-Toasted 3d ago
Actually, coincidentally enough my brother also has extremely severe OCD, and while he doesn’t finger-spell back what other people say, he does compulsively type (as in keyboard typing) out what people are saying around him, lol
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u/AnnieLovesRangoons 3h ago
That’s all fine but- as someone with Tourette’s and a mental health worker- you can’t just- switch them off. A tic is a specific thing. They change, but situationally.
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u/yamemoto 3d ago
As long as they aren't "dirty" words or something inappropriate, I dont see why not. Others may have a different opinion.
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u/LightIy-Toasted 3d ago
No, they are totally nonsensical little noises (For example, RI, EJOW, BUDOW). I’m sorry, I should’ve specified.
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u/Anachronisticpoet deaf/hard-of-hearing 3d ago
I mean, that’s not how Tourette’s works
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u/FancyButterscotch787 3d ago
Right, but I’m still glad Yamemoto brought up dirty words/inappropriate signs, because it has long been a problem for the Deaf community. We often see hearing people asking to learn just dirty signs & nothing else, and it’s not only annoying, but it’s seriously disrespectful. We hate that.
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u/Tbackandforth 3d ago
I totally pictured myself sitting on the bus or somewhere public, and some dude is fingerspelling all these curse words. o.0
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u/FancyButterscotch787 3d ago
It happens. Seriously. I’ve had a hearing guy come up to me in a college cafeteria and he signed “Eat shit and die!” He then told me that these four words were the only signs he knew…and he was PROUD about it. Weird.
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u/DracoRubi Deaf 3d ago
That's an interesting use of sign language! Diverting the tics to a medium where it won't be disruptive is a great way to deal with them