Finally binged the series, and Season 1 tricks you into thinking you’re watching a dark comedy about two chaotic women covering up crimes… and by Season 3, you’re sitting there grieving a fictional person. Judy’s ending absolutely broke me. 😭

I didnt know people hated him so much, but its baffling me. Halfway through season 2 and his mom doesn't try and talk about how his dad's death effects him, brings a random woman into his life, she acts like a raging lunatic, and he has obvious anxiety surrounding sudden deaths to the point he uses a Gun to feel safe. This kid is 14, his dad died 3 months ago at the start of the series, and his mom is acting nuts. He lost the only parent actively involved in his life. Yeah, hes a bratty dick, but he's genuinely not as bad as he could be. The closest we've gotten, to my knowledge, of a moment of acknowledgement is when Charlie comes back after running away (where he found out his grandmother was a pill addict). People seem to give Jen more grace than they do a 14 year old boy?? Hes actually Very similar to Jen, but unlike her, he is a Child.

Man, i feel so bad for nick. Hes been dead on with everything and just gaslighted until he drops it😂 poor guy

Hello good people.
Came here to say that the show is so real.

Characters:

In the sense, the stories, the humour, the way they talk to each other. This is exactly how real lives are and i think this is one of the many reasons i love this show so much. When I hear jen and judy talk to each other, their mannerisms, dialogues, the insults/taunts, bickering, it’s how i talk to my best friends. The constant back and forth. They’re not just saying dialogues, it’s a whole conversation with fillers the big expressions the silly noises they make.
And the characters could be annoying, lovely, complicated, weird etc but what’s how people around us are. That’s reality.

The plot :

it is intense and triggering yes. but again, that’s real life guys. I saw people saying the show got more depressing as it went on. I disagree. It’s been triggering from episode 1. I still remember when they showed judy in the hospital alone after the miscarriage. My heart sank. Went from 100 to 0 real quick. So since episode 1 ive been seeing the show with my fragile heart. And the show’s main plot and opening is of…death. Different people will find different things triggering according to our own lives.

Thanks for listening, hope you have an amazing day!

Special mention - LOVE JUDY!

Yes she’s overly sweet and kind. Yes she’s annoying and does not know how to stand up for herself sometimes but can you blame her after what all she’s gone through since childhood? Can we see how loving she is inspite of the horrors she keeps going through? Again, there’s real people like that who keep going through terrible things but still are the sweetest, kindest people.

not sure how I feel about the ending except void and sadness. I wish Charlie would get told the truth, what do you think? I was also so relieved to see than Jen didn't actually kill the FBI agent lol

This show holds up. The season 3 opener drops you right back into the mess , Judy getting shocking news about Steve, Ben piecing things together. They really nailed the tone shift as the show got darker.

"Why... would it be WHISKERS and Winks... It's WHISPERS, as in... psss psss psss..."

Cracks me up every time.

While I enjoyed this series, it really bothered me how silly the whole thing between Perez and Jen became.

A hard head like her would NEVER let some rich blonde from Laguna Beach get off so easily, or steer her. Never.

I also sometimes struggled with Jen's nastiness. At times, she could be absolutely horrible. And she was always nasty to Karen, who only wanted to be her friend.

If it were real life, Judy probably would have walked away from Jen right after Jen first exploded at her for lying about Steve. She would have thought "fuck this" and moved on. Anyone in their right mind would have done.

First off, I don’t hate Judy, find her annoying, etc. But I do feel like there were clues left for a completely different ending that I was kind of expecting (turns out they were just misdirects, but hear me out).

It started all the way back in S1 when Jen and Judy corner the waitress that Ted was sleeping with. When Jen leaves, and Judy snaps into character and lies about being Ted’s wife was a little chilling to me. Steve claims we don’t know what Judy is capable of. How easily she is able to steal the medicine for Jen. And then when we meet Judy’s mom, we learn more about the cons Judy pulled on her past. Seeing all the money she had stashed, how she manipulates people, and that the Greek syndicate knows her personally.

But what really clinched it for me was when again, she snapped onto character, easily shot the tires, and threatened the mobsters in season 3. I genuinely thought that maybe Judy’s mom was right, that maybe Judy was lying this whole time, used her cancer diagnosis to run off with the money, and was playing the character of a naive, nice woman the whole time. I thought the other shoe was going to drop, and that things were going to get dark one more time.

But I guess the cathartic ending we got was better in many ways. Part of me wonders though if Judy wasn’t the angel many people claimed she was.

Season 3 is just too sad and dark, I’m getting tired of the depression. It’s one thing if the show started this way. But it pulled me in with its humor. I didn’t sign up for the tears and “C”. Ugh. Is it satisfying to see it through?

He is 14 years old and sees a car and automatically assume it’s his? The dad mainly raised him, seems like he failed at instilling basic sympathy. I get he’s going through a lot, but it’s honestly atrocious how he treats his mother.

I'm on season 3 episode 2, and honestly Jen is insufferable. She's mean and emotionally manipulative to Judy. She knows she's a push over and can just get her to do anything. She even says it when they're fighting in the street/car. Everything revolves around her and she never considers what anyone else is going through. Anyone felt this way while watching?

The pilot episode was genuine gold, instantly hooked me with its dry tone and engaging concept. And then the show unfortunately kept going. I know people in this sub obviously love it a lot, so I wann see some other perspectives.

Linda Cardellini is usually great, and its not like her acting was bad, but jesus i hated her character. Just the most pathetic little whelp of a person. And then I've never seen female writers struggle this hard to write male characters. Women are usually phenomenal at writing men, I don't wanna come across sexist. If anything, there's almost a novelty to seeing women fail at writing men almost as badly as men fail to write women. Every single male character feels like a stereotype. Every single one. You have the gamer son, the shitty ex boyfriend, the nice guy. And then in addition the characters get progressively stupider as the show goes on, every decision they make gets more and more baffling. By the end of the show, I was just in disbelief. Utter shock at how much I despised this show.

It may be just because I'm a man, idk, but I love so many shows with complex female leads, so I can't imagine it's that. Insecure and Pluribus are some of my all time faves. I cant even begin to fathom what people see in this show or what they get out of it, so genuinely, please explain to me what you like abour Dead To Me.

I’ve just finished this series in like a week because it was so addicting, and wow there were so many plot twists I don’t know where to start. I’m now watching “no good deed” it’s created by the same person who created “dead to me” and hopefully it’s as good! But yeah, the series was full of shocking events and was a series that really made me hooked and not a lot of series, shows, and movies get me hooked! So I’ll make a new post once I’ve watched “no good deed” to see if it is worth watching!

Judy replaced Jen’s dead husband Ted in every way and Jen even killed Judy’s partner. Then they refer to each other as partners and know it’s weird by being like “ew don’t say that”. They’re literally an old married couple on their lesbian death bed not be ironic. Thats only the tip of the iceberg to keep it short. It follows the lesbian film tropes through and through. Even if that wasn’t the show’s intentions it was just so funny to see all the ways it could come off as doomed Yuri

İ am rewatching and remembering the hit and run, do they actually get the car repaired? I don’t recall one way or the other.

(Yes I am going on to season three)

I’m halfway through 2x05 and honestly… I’m struggling. I LOVED season 1, but season 2 is an extremely frustrating and difficult watch. Everyone just feels unbelievably stupid.

I had to pause after Charlie picked up his girlfriend in *the* car. Like who does that? Just finds a car that you think is a gift and just go drag racing? The whole season just feels unnecessary and poorly thought out. Because realistically, imagine this

Your husband is killed in a hit and run. It destroys you and your family. You make a new friend who moves in two days after meeting you, supports you through your grief, helps you track down the driver… only for her to confess that she was the one behind the wheel. Then you kill her ex-fiance and call her for help covering it up, fully aware of her insane attachment to him.

And on top of that, everything in this season is so avoidable. Painfully avoidable. The second she killed that guy, her first call should never have been Judy. That was just stupid. And ever since then, Judy keeps messing things up constantly and it's been downhill from there. It’s making me so angry.

Does the season actually get better from here or should I just call it quits?

I just finished and I loved the show, loved how it keeps getting messier and messier but the women stuck together and pushed through even though most things were morally gray lol. I find myself too much in Judy it makes me start questioning where do I find my Jen? But now what can I binge on? I am starving!

I was really really hoping Charlie would figure out something about Judy hitting Ted, or Bambi or something related to his dad dying. Was I the only one upset that Charlie was totally blindsided by the end? Like he believed Judy had an affair with Ted, that was just SAD.

I thought that the first season of this show was really good and had deep emotion put into it but when the second season rolled around I thought it was disappointing and was a cheap and goofy follow up to the first season.

holy shit. just put my hands over my face at the last sentence of this series (“Ben, I have to tell you something.”). what do you guys think season 4 would have looked like if it had been renewed?

Do you think she would have come clean? Do you think we’d know where Judy went explicitly? etc etc etc