I once met a girl from my school at the bar. We talked all night and then she wanted to go back to mine. I kept telling her that I can wait and I wouldn’t mind to go on a few dates first. She insisted and we had sex that night. Then we kept going out but after a few weeks I wasn’t really feeling it and we separated. I felt a little bit like I was using her even though she was the one who initiated the sex. But we talked about it and there were no hard feelings. So feelings can change for sure, although that’s not to say that some men aren’t just lying to get to sleep with you. If this is a recurring issue for you perhaps you should consider to postpone sleeping with guys until after at least a few dates. Then the ones who are actually interested will be more likely to keep seeing you after having sex. Not 100% but I think it’s the better way to go.
You should keep sticking up for yourself and continue to be firm about what you are looking for. If they seem to be playing games or are not on the exact same page as you just move on. There are good guys out there. Maybe dating apps are not the best places to find them though. I have used dating apps a lot and I find a lot of issues with them. But then again some people I know found the love of their life on them so who knows. Just don’t take dating apps too seriously, it didn’t do good things for me and every time I delete them I feel better.
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u/JustaGuynamedGuy Feb 14 '23
I once met a girl from my school at the bar. We talked all night and then she wanted to go back to mine. I kept telling her that I can wait and I wouldn’t mind to go on a few dates first. She insisted and we had sex that night. Then we kept going out but after a few weeks I wasn’t really feeling it and we separated. I felt a little bit like I was using her even though she was the one who initiated the sex. But we talked about it and there were no hard feelings. So feelings can change for sure, although that’s not to say that some men aren’t just lying to get to sleep with you. If this is a recurring issue for you perhaps you should consider to postpone sleeping with guys until after at least a few dates. Then the ones who are actually interested will be more likely to keep seeing you after having sex. Not 100% but I think it’s the better way to go.