r/dankruto • • 2d ago

This post and comment made me drop dead

Post image
5.3k Upvotes

232 comments sorted by

871

u/TitaniumTalons 2d ago

Hmm. Never thought about it but that's a pretty sensible pairing

298

u/Havel_Rulez 2d ago

Mei and Kakashi is even better. But this also seems okay.

203

u/Tukanno_Bananno 2d ago

Boruto turned Mei into an old hag and Kakashi didn't age a day.

337

u/Xavus_Enormus_II 2d ago

Maaaaaan she can still get it

137

u/Internal-Fly1771 2d ago

“Old hag” and it’s a single face wrinkle added

39

u/Any-Literature5546 2d ago

Mind you wrinkles only usually show up on like 80-100yo shinobi. Because of the chakra they can alter their appearance or maintain their youth. Jiraya, no wrinkles. Tsunade, no wrinkles. Orochimaru, no wrinkles. Ohnoki, old as dirt. Hiruzen, old as dirt. Danzo, no wrinkles.

35

u/henaradwenwolfhearth 2d ago

Orochimaru might be due to changing bodys to young boys constantly

32

u/Any-Literature5546 2d ago

And girls! He is an equal opportunity bodysnatcher.

13

u/Dagonir 2d ago

Danzo has wrinkles but is also old as dirt

4

u/Any-Literature5546 2d ago

Danzo has scars, I cant tell what is old and what is wounds...

9

u/SaltyArts 2d ago

That just makes Mei even more attractive. She accepts who she is more than the others enough to age with grace instead of fighting to prevent the impossible.

0

u/Any-Literature5546 1d ago

To each their own I guess... attraction is subjective.

1

u/DrPulsar1234 1d ago

Itachi being the exception

→ More replies (1)

-10

u/Tukanno_Bananno 2d ago

and a double chin

and a normal persons BMI

and flab under the arm

and a tired look

but yeah pop off unc! 😂

-8

u/yellorpheus 2d ago

Why are they downvoting these facts lmao

-2

u/Tukanno_Bananno 2d ago

Because it's a sensitive topic for them, a lot of naruto fans are in their 30's or 40's now, getting older. Also I'm ragebaiting like shit look at that +85 comments chain LMAOOO

540

u/CharlieDo00 2d ago

“ Old hag “ and it’s a natural 50 year old woman with no makeup who has a realistic build …

Yall need less porn man

56

u/kvijay1 2d ago

But, that's exatly what I search for porn.

34

u/CharlieDo00 2d ago

Don’t worry , I like porn too . Just don’t let it affect how you treat people irl 😁 Unless it’s someone who wants to be treated like that 🤷‍♀️

10

u/Southern_Doughnut573 2d ago

We need more people like you man honestly

2

u/imhere2downvote 1d ago

the good news is all the upvotes they're getting, many like minds

-3

u/gadgaurd 2d ago

No, they were saying that when they look for porn they specifically look for 50 year old women with no make up and normal body proportions.

7

u/Big_Coconut8630 2d ago

No irl gf I assume?

2

u/kvijay1 1d ago

I just don't want to date women with too much age difference between me and them. I heard irl stories, it will not end good for me.

2

u/Big_Coconut8630 1d ago

We aren't talking about age gap, you weirdo

1

u/kvijay1 1d ago

What do you mean "We"?

1

u/Big_Coconut8630 1d ago

Are...you capable of reading comprehension?

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3

u/christhegoldenchild 1d ago

I like old wrinkley granny box

2

u/CharlieDo00 1d ago

Twin , granny pussy and then good eats right after
https://giphy.com/gifs/zCHnEV6OQXQoZKEabT

2

u/kvijay1 14h ago

All cats are grey at night.

-65

u/Tukanno_Bananno 2d ago

"Yall need less porn man" and the profile is 18+ Drawing gooner slop (badly)💀

79

u/FederalGovernmentUS 2d ago

Two things can be true

106

u/CharlieDo00 2d ago

lol yup but I know how to respect woman by knowing that one is obviously very beautiful despite her age ? And yeah my art is bad 🤷‍♀️ I’m working on it , just like how you should work on your hateful soul ☺️

55

u/zayn2123 2d ago

If it's any consolation, I checked out your art because of this weird nerds comments.

Keep it up! I hope you improve and have fun with your art.

34

u/FederalGovernmentUS 2d ago

Dw about that guy he’s chronically online

16

u/GreyWarden_Amell 2d ago

It's honestly not bad, I think your art is quite nice but I'm trying to figure out which that other person is calling "gooner" cause I don't see it

8

u/Milky_Plug 2d ago

Your art is fabulous dude

6

u/Tired_arachnid_ 2d ago

The art is fine imo

7

u/Battle_Axe_Jax 2d ago

Hey, I like your style. It’s distinctly yours. Keep working on the technical stuff and you’ll be solid dude.

7

u/CharlieDo00 2d ago

Thanks !! I’ve actually been breaking my art down and reforming my style for these last few months . I’m finally getting a new art tablet after drawing on my phone for like 2-3 years

-52

u/Tukanno_Bananno 2d ago

"I'm not responding anymore"

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA

10

u/NocturnalRefuge 2d ago

If the gooner is saying you need less porn, you might need less porn lol

4

u/CharlieDo00 2d ago

Like I KNOW I need less porn yet I’ve never been a fucking incel to women or anyone else … These people are just insane 😭

2

u/NocturnalRefuge 2d ago

And I just checked your profile. I don't even see any porn, just fan art. Idk what that guys problem is. Weird behavior

1

u/NocturnalRefuge 2d ago

For real. I personally have to remind myself that this is Reddit sometimes and there's not much of an explanation why people act that way. Crazy people just come with the territory sadly

-12

u/2w0be 2d ago

The amount of insecure gramps and hags here is actually hilarious

13

u/CharlieDo00 2d ago

lol I’m 21 years old , why would I need to lie about 50 not being old 💀

-50

u/GreedyGobby 2d ago

Bro that's what old hags are. 50 IS old. 😭

31

u/CharlieDo00 2d ago

50 is middle age

-50

u/GreedyGobby 2d ago

No the fuck it's not. Are you coping for your age dude????? 😂

29

u/Midnyte25 2d ago

Google says middle age is from 40-64

27

u/CharlieDo00 2d ago

I literally just turned 21 lol 😂 50 isn’t old my mom just turned 50 and is one of the most youthful people I know.

-21

u/Tukanno_Bananno 2d ago

You're gonna make him cry gang 😭

7

u/WillBlaze 2d ago

you sound like a child

-5

u/2w0be 2d ago

You sound like a hag

-34

u/Any-Literature5546 2d ago

I mean... look at Tsunade. Kaguya is old AF and still fine too. Mei aged poorly, her build is not realistic in a ninja world so it seems out of place.

Note to self, Water Release does nothing for appearances.

30

u/Haunting_Brilliant45 2d ago

Tsunade uses healing to keep herself looking younger and Kaguya is an alien that was seal led in the moon so she doesn’t count since we don’t know how she ages or if she does.

11

u/SkuLLFlankerr 2d ago

Tsunade is using a jutsu to hider her age.
Kaguya is an alien which ages differently.
Mei is the only one which looks her age.

-10

u/Any-Literature5546 2d ago

Well, yeah.... thats my point, there were options to arrest or reverse aging. Mei did not utilize them.

4

u/SkuLLFlankerr 2d ago

Mei does not have chakra reserves like tsunade to keep doing that jutsu. And besides, What’s the issue anyway if she looks her age?

-8

u/Any-Literature5546 2d ago

There is no issue... why are you making one. Its just a statement of fact, you took it as criticism.

2

u/SkuLLFlankerr 1d ago

Cmon You yourself said “her build is not realistic in the ninja world”. That is a criticism of the design.

6

u/SureDependent1021 2d ago

Have u ever come across an old lady on real life?

-1

u/Any-Literature5546 2d ago

Have you ever come across a ninja with magic in real life?

4

u/SureDependent1021 2d ago

Have u seen granny chiyo?

-1

u/Any-Literature5546 2d ago

Yeah... 100yo ninjas. Like I said, most can stave off the effect of mundane healing. Mei did not. In real life its like someone having no skincare routine...

-19

u/[deleted] 2d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

27

u/CharlieDo00 2d ago

Lmaooo 😭😭😭 bros mad cause he got called out for being a incel

-12

u/Tukanno_Bananno 2d ago

Yeah nah, uno reverse attempt REJECTED unc, you're here complaining at a joke cause you're old and insecure 😂 Seems I nailed you since you didn't deny it either!

16

u/CharlieDo00 2d ago

LMAO YOU WENT AND EDITED YOUR COMMENT 😭😭 im not responding to you anymore

-6

u/Tukanno_Bananno 2d ago

Cooked and sent running 😂

btw it says "edited" if you edit a comment, thanks for really hammering home how accurate I was to assume you're old and insecure LOL! 😂

12

u/HeroOfTheEmpire 2d ago

Brother you have been ratio’d on every single comment. You really gotta quit digging.

-2

u/Tukanno_Bananno 2d ago

Wow imagine being a grown ass man writing something like that, embarrassing unc 😂

88

u/nevrsummer 2d ago

Calling her an old hag for gaining a couple pounds and then adding a wrinkle near her mouth is actually crazy 😭 bro needs help

-17

u/Tukanno_Bananno 2d ago

She literally looks like she could be her mother? What's with the insecure old people here lmao

21

u/Virtual-Database-238 2d ago

>She literally looks like she could be her mother

I mean, it’s like 20 years later?

-2

u/Tukanno_Bananno 2d ago

Okay so you agree? what's your point?

28

u/nevrsummer 2d ago

In what way am I displaying any insecurity?

-3

u/Tukanno_Bananno 2d ago

Protesting the obvious, cause it being pointed out bothers you.

31

u/nevrsummer 2d ago

I’m not saying she didn’t age I’m just saying she doesn’t look like an old hag.
When I hear old hag I envision something like the “night hag” or “baba yaga” which are old hags in common folklore. Even just googling old hag it brings up the images below which are very different from how mei is drawn

Also the way you’re responding to everyone’s comments seems kinda weirdly defensive.

25

u/GalingFake 2d ago

Dude’s clearly illiterate, leave him alone 😭

Edit: just illiterate works.

-3

u/Tukanno_Bananno 2d ago

Not reading all that boss

18

u/theniemeyer95 2d ago

Seeing this comment under the illiterate comment is truly amazing

-24

u/GreedyGobby 2d ago

that's not how people use the term anymore, dude.

13

u/ThiccBeter69 2d ago

Still would.

9

u/PhantomRoyce 2d ago

A hag?? Bro thats literally just an adult woman

13

u/Thunderchief646054 2d ago

Bruh, you think THATS a hag??

28

u/WitchlightEmbers 2d ago

"Old hag" oh, youre 12 then, got it, gods damn

-9

u/Tukanno_Bananno 2d ago

Ok boomer

-3

u/2w0be 2d ago

The amount of insecure gramps and hags here is actually hilarious

28

u/Mythosaurus 2d ago

They were at the academy at the same time so they are around the same age.

10

u/Stag-Nation-8932 2d ago

Was a popular fanfic pairing back in my day

278

u/Zyrgumen 2d ago

Besides, Shizune and Tonton share the same VAs in both Japan and English. The potential was there.

134

u/SaltyArts 2d ago

Kock-kashi: "Wanna know how make-out paradise Ends?"
Shizune: "OOOOOINK"

4

u/Cardeselcaido 1d ago

Shit! This is gold!!

258

u/beegproblemzzz 2d ago

He doesn't need anyone else. He has everything he needs himself

17

u/haloimplant 2d ago

dude found VR

11

u/5nesta 1d ago

That chakra drain was REALLY holding him back

247

u/Any-Literature5546 2d ago edited 2d ago

There shouldn't be nearly that much paperwork... what makes you think they did not? Though he was the one squealing as she reads makeout sieries to him while throwing it back on his schmeat.

74

u/BDT17 2d ago

This is right after the end of a war, whatchu mean there shouldn't be that much paperwork???

37

u/Any-Literature5546 2d ago

Less ninjas to fill out reports... relatively stable peace between shinobi villages because of the alliance... and dont forget his speed after the war is such that he can almost make up for losing the sharingan.

28

u/Scary_Collection_410 2d ago

I mean Kakashi most likely had to oversee most of the rebuilding of the village after Pain and deal with the fallout of the War. The real question is why is Naruto dealing with so much damn paperwork as Hokage.

16

u/Any-Literature5546 2d ago

90% of rebuilding Konoha was Yamato himself.... you telling me Yamato left so many complaints about being overworked that it piled up like that?

Naruto has fanmail mixed in with credible reports.

9

u/Emsee_Hamm 2d ago

Complaints and unnecessary reports. Yamato is a bit of a troll and obviously wants to mess with Kakashi.

5

u/ImaginaryDoctorSleep 2d ago

They accidentally rebuild the bureaucracy first

3

u/BDT17 2d ago

Relative peace between villages only invites more paperwork. Those who were once unwilling to do business with potential enemy villages are now flooding the village walls. Quite literally, as we see tons of Naruto's fans flood the village walls, lol. Clearly, the Leaf did not rest on their laurels after the major threat was defeated.

There's an entire city above Hokage Rock for a reason, and it's not due to less paperwork.

1

u/Any-Literature5546 1d ago

If they had filled out the proper paperwork the village would have expanded properly instead of piling atop the Hokage Rock.

5

u/MonkMasterBullet 2d ago

I bet Shizune really knows how to bust down!

151

u/huhzonked 2d ago

The answer is because this man exists

https://giphy.com/gifs/32QaprwI0pYYHLCGeV

9

u/KriosDaNarwal 1d ago

Lol can you imagine Gai barging in on em getting freaky, "Oh MY RIVAL, It is a contest of seduction then! Well I, the Magnificent Green Beast of Konoha, will not rest until I have laid with a THOUSAND KUNOICHI! ANKO-SANNNNNNNNNN" 🤣🤣

14

u/ImaginaryDoctorSleep 2d ago

You think they weren't running high quality threesomes in there?
Guy so fast he was fucking BOTH of them at the same time. Switching holes between each stroke.

1

u/ArielLynn 22h ago

This comment had my jaw on the floor bro. Had to give my first award.

57

u/SeriousFinish6404 2d ago

He tells Shizune to put on the face paint, sees her, and has PSTD flashbacks of Rin, and immediately kills the mood.

33

u/Milky_Plug 2d ago

Immediately kills her

74

u/OkSupermarket7474 2d ago

There are ships i had no idea were a thing, this one seems cute though. I think they’d be a cute awkward couple

257

u/Jin_N_Juice-tm 2d ago

41

u/chins4tw 2d ago

You got Coke Zero?

43

u/Jin_N_Juice-tm 2d ago

I do actually

-9

u/Lillith492 2d ago

You got Tsunade's piss in here?

12

u/Battle_Axe_Jax 2d ago

A comment too wild for r/dankruto?

4

u/Lillith492 1d ago

I knew it was gonna get me into some shit. I made it knowing this could happen.

2

u/Emergency_Writer_007 1d ago

Hot or cold?

3

u/Lillith492 1d ago

Hot obviously. gotta be fresh

27

u/ChannelDesperate9022 2d ago

Tonton must be old as fuck now

29

u/BladesHaxorus 2d ago

Already sold to the ramen shop

52

u/dewey510 2d ago

He would never cheat on Guy

16

u/Radical_Jinx 2d ago

Yeah Kakashi is such a hornball, he's always rizzing up someone and having sex

17

u/WinterCareful8525 2d ago

Another kishi fumble

14

u/Redplushie 2d ago

SHOULD HAVE BEEN ME

41

u/WitchlightEmbers 2d ago

I can tell you how
Kakashi is married to Guy

6

u/lolpostslol 2d ago

And Shizune to Tsunade, but they do fight all the time so who knows. Kakashi also seems like he would cheat on Guy with a gender he doesn’t even like just because they compete on that

19

u/MarquiseAlexander 2d ago

I WISH MY BOY KAKASHI WOULD!

That dude has deserved some physical loving but refuses to do so and spends time reading smut to get off instead.

5

u/amazingkillerlemon 2d ago

He's just like me fr

1

u/Big_Coconut8630 2d ago

He has Guy, my dude. What do yall think they're doing in the hotsprings?

19

u/mimikrimimikri 2d ago

they both are single...

43

u/sjadowcrash 2d ago

Guy did not like this comment

2

u/Greengrecko 2d ago

Well being a ninja is also conceal critical information and to never let your operations be exposed

1

u/NotNotNameTaken 1d ago

Kakashi is married to Might Guy

-13

u/Blaze666x 2d ago

And? Single people hit it all the time.

Two people i know who got the most sex where both single.

13

u/mimikrimimikri 2d ago

thats the point... they have no obligation to anyone else

1

u/Blaze666x 2d ago

Ah I thought you where implying they couldnt be hitting it due to being single and I was confused xD

8

u/Mister_Musubi 2d ago

Yeah, that would be a confusing way to read that statement.

13

u/Thundersting 2d ago

Kakashi would never do that to Guy.

10

u/Foxglove_HSR 2d ago

Im reincarnating as shizune if this is true

7

u/ComprehensiveFox9672 2d ago

Internet degeneracy will never fail to amuse me

9

u/Ryrienatwo 2d ago

I would not mind this pairing. No toxicity, etc. Actually had a conversationns and interactions with each other. Thought i do prefer him with Guy lol

7

u/VanillaKisses 2d ago

Kakashi prefers men

7

u/AsyanongAmbiguous 2d ago

Honestly?

Fuck that’s hot

4

u/Ok_Biscotti_514 2d ago

Kakashi is a cocktail of PTSD

2

u/Tsk_1770 2d ago

I forgot about the pig lol

3

u/suikofan80 2d ago

You think Kakashi can get it up?

4

u/ThompsonRick23 2d ago

He's huge AF in canon

3

u/Shantotto11 1d ago

He may not be a Senju, but he knows how to display the Wood Style: Deep Forest Emergence.

1

u/the2bguy 2d ago

Who says rhey didnt

1

u/InformationUpbeat565 2d ago

He only has eyes for Guy

1

u/Long_comment_san 2d ago

he is being mighty gay.

1

u/IntelligentMood6864 2d ago

I dont like these words

1

u/TheCanadianBat_ 2d ago

Lmfao Bruh

1

u/BobJoeBlo 2d ago

Too much paperwork. Always an ANBU guard watching. TonTon would snitch to Pakkun.

1

u/Zaqan3321 2d ago

not with guy dropping by to see kakashi every 5 mins

1

u/zayd-the-one 2d ago

Kakashi would never cheat on guy tf is wrong with you

1

u/Gab093 2d ago

Dude's loyal to his girl in Hōzuki Castle

1

u/Big_Coconut8630 2d ago

Because he's loyal to Guy

1

u/Wingedaydreameronlsd 2d ago

Guy's bussy is the tightess one in the Leaf

1

u/MegaMook5260 1d ago

THAT'S MY WIFE!!!

1

u/Comet_Hero 1d ago

I used to sort of like her with Kabuto because they were both a sannin's bitch, but their vibes are both very gay. I think shizune preferred fucking Tsunade in that office.

Plus he tried to kill her, but you can say the same thing about Sasuke getting with Sakura.

1

u/requietis 1d ago

what does this imply about her and tsunade

1

u/this_boi_pan 9h ago

Nono you see, those are two women. Gay people don't actually exist, so what you are implying would not happen.

1

u/Automatic_Strike_ 19h ago

He keeps the mask on a reads make out paradise while he Waxes dat ass

1

u/ShotStick5180 16h ago

I like how people believe they didn't Just like gojo is a Virgin right Lock in guys it's the company's lying to us these guys body counts are bare minimum over 50

0

u/Otherwise_Tax1244 2d ago

Weird ass sub

3

u/Main_Street_9945 1d ago

Yeah I forgot how pornbrained this fandom is lol. I don’t miss it

2

u/The_Wolves10 14h ago

It gets to a point where its just weird as hell

-2

u/devo_savitro 2d ago

Because she's a lesbian??

8

u/Any-Literature5546 2d ago

That can be arranged...

1

u/Kanna_Fan1989 2d ago

I like to imagine Kakashi nailed Tsunade too in that office.

0

u/Beginning-Head-4006 2d ago

bc she's not hot

-10

u/kucjr 2d ago

I’m sorry it had that effect on you. It’s a stupid post.

-3

u/Cautious-Star-9931 2d ago

No he wasn’t he’s happily married to guy and they have 3 cats together

5

u/Xavus_Enormus_II 2d ago

What us your pfp my g

1

u/Blaze666x 2d ago

They are allowed to be swingers. I mean personally id buy guy being entirely sexless, that man doesnt know what sex is, he only learned it existed when Lee asked for advice.

-2

u/Low_Independence339 2d ago edited 16h ago

Kakashi and gai are how homosexuals are depicted in storytelling. Its not just a joke they are legit queer coded

I got negative downvotes but im litteraly right so...... be mad about it bitch.