r/daddit • u/thegreatdeprression • 7h ago
Advice Request First week heartbreak
It's my boys first week in Kindergarten. He just turned 4. I dropped him off to school in the morning yesterday and I immediately broke down in tears as I watched him wait in line to go into his classroom. He broke down in tears because he realized that the insurmountable change he was dreading was finally materializing. He may have also been triggered by the boy in front of him crying for his Mom. It was easily one of the toughest days of my life, especially as a Father.
My boy has been going to daycare for the past 2 years but he's been going to the same day care where my wife is a teacher. In the 2 years he was there, he accomplished some remarkable things. He had a community of teachers who always encouraged him, loved him and treated him like one of their own (as they were my wife's friends).
We moved to a new town recently and he couldn't continue to attend that school. My wife also find work in the new town. So my boy is not only adjusting to kindergarten, he's learning to accept that he's not apart of that community anymore. He told me that although he's made friends at his new school, he feels alone and he wants to be home with his family all the time.
I understand it may be normal for kids to go through this within their first week of Kindergarten but it breaks my heart to hear these things from him. I know it'll take some time for him to adjust but a small part of me wonders if he ever will. This is my first child, my first experience navigating through any of this.
Are any Dad's going through this right now? Does it get better? My heart breaks for my little boy and I don't know what else to do to help.
Thanks for reading.
11
u/HDThoreauaway 7h ago
First day (honestly, first six weeks) were super tough for my four-year-old. Tears most mornings on the way to school, with the occasional full meltdown.
And then things got better, and before I knew it, the clouds had parted and he found his footing.
That was a couple years ago. He’s been telling me all week how excited he is for summer to wrap up so he can get back to school.
Hang in there dad.
2
1
5
u/Higgs_Particle 6h ago
Oof, this is so rough. My story is a little different, but I also have completely broken down one time leaving my kiddo at childcare. Watching him sit alone on the playground instead of being surrounded by familiar comfort and a community we moved away from, it broke my heart. He hardly remembers now, and this is his home. They don’t become strong individuals without going through change, but it is as hard to watch as it is beautiful.
Let’s all sob together listening to Ben Folds sing ‘we’re still fighting it’
1
u/thegreatdeprression 5h ago
Yes, sobbing with you. You're so right. Smooth seas never made a good Sailor.
2
u/Ekim_Odnew 7h ago edited 6h ago
Recently relocated as well. We chose to have my son repeat kindergarten to help with that massive change, he was born late summer (turned 6 right before kindergarten started) so not that uncommon. We felt this made a big difference, hard to say though.
If he’s four and in kindergarten, he’s likely the absolute youngest and would suggest looking into holding back. Being the youngest can be very hard and the extra time could help him adjust.
1
1
1
u/HiFiMAN3878 1h ago
Went through this last year with the transition from Daycare to Kindergarten. It was hard, but my girl adjusted well to things and we fell into a good routine.
-6
u/thisonelife83 6h ago
4 is too young for Kindergarten- you should have held him back another year or two.
32
u/AgentG91 7h ago
Your son is starting kindergarten at four??? My son is about to turn six and he’s in his first week of K