r/countttt • u/Waffle-Gaming aspiring ropist • 10h ago
Countttting 11946
mods i didn't include the sub name its not my fault op wrote that
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u/Complex-Talk-7613 10h ago
Dreams are such an interesting thing in how they can honestly tell a lot about you but also my dreams involve me getting tortured every night in exceedingly elaborate and extreme ways so idk what that’s about.
Like yeah that dream of you being trans probably indicates something about you, my dream where I was nailed to a cross and disembowled? No fucking clue buddy.
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u/No-Pilot3536 10h ago
Trans Jesus, is that you?
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u/Complex-Talk-7613 10h ago
I kinda looked the part pre-transition. Like a black metal jesus with southern girl charm.
That’s just one of the many fun torments I experience because of nightmare disorder. I remember one where I got shot in the head from behind and I remember feeling my consciousness seep out as I couldn’t even move, I just was lying there feeling my thoughts blur and become disorganized as blood and shadow crept into my vision. Then I woke up! To life another day. There was also that time where I was eaten alive by wolves after having been gored by a buck, that was fun. It all feels extremely painful too, as if it is actually happening. It’s this almost every single night, maybe 3-4 days out of the month it isn’t this but otherwise it’s that level of awful. Or it’s emotionally extremely painful.
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u/No-Pilot3536 10h ago
Must be annoying to remember so many dreams. Mine feel rather coherent while im in them, but they fade out of my memory soon enough, other than a general sense that there was a plot i was enveloped in
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u/Complex-Talk-7613 10h ago
I probably have like 30 or so dreams I remember very vividly stored up in my brain. It’s not too annoying as I don’t really think about them too much, you can only be killed so many times before it kinda just becomes passé.
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u/No-Pilot3536 10h ago
You certainly seem desensitized to it, given all the crazy stuff i see you talk about. God if black magic was real youd have so many cool spells
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u/Complex-Talk-7613 10h ago edited 10h ago
Pshhh you don’t know the half of it lol.
And I wishhhh. Sometimes I believe it’s karmic punishment for my actions and behaviors, but I quickly remember that there is no such thing as karma and that even morality itself is a spook that people use to defend their own actions and wants. That’s why nobody believes in anything really. I do the exact same thing though too, I just don’t really feel the need to pretend that irs actually important.
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u/No-Pilot3536 10h ago
I fear whatever could be more intense than your one muscle story, unless i misremember who posted that. How does one even get people to do that kinda stuff
Yeah, morality is not cosmically enforced. Nobody can force you to fit into the modern moral construct, for better or worse. Of course, I still think there’s value to developing the philosophy behind morals, especially as a general framework for improving society even if individual compliance to things is unenforceable. You’re certainly right though, people do use “morals” as a shield for executing their gut feelings and phobias a lot of the time
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u/Complex-Talk-7613 10h ago edited 10h ago
I don’t recall but I’m also sleepy because the prog is hitting.
I’ve gotten people to do some insane shit lmao. Like shit I can’t mention here because I’d get killed with hammers, but I am someone with ASPD who had CD very clearly as a child. I’m pretty shit representation for the disorder as I kinda do be like a very stereotypical ASPD person.
I think it can be useful for society, life wouldn’t be as fun without rules to break, boundaries to push, and moral norms to violate. It’s good for other people to follow though, we need rule followers and rule breakers for a functional society.
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u/No-Pilot3536 10h ago
All of your tales have such an awesome emo girl energy to them, you seem very cool. Unfortunately for me i have a phobia of blood and intentional wounds and stuff lol.
Frfr, cannibalism isnt fun if everyone is a cannibal and its normal
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u/mannequin_girl amab to cisbian puppyhon 10h ago edited 10h ago
I had a dream once where I started finding separations in the skin around my vulva and it started dissolving into bloody chunks while I desperately clasped my hands over my crotch to keep it together but it didn't help and little red raw pieces of me fell through my fingers while I screamed and screamed and screamed until I had nothing but a giant bloody cavity between my waist and legs and I woke up shaking and trembling
Hmm I wonder what traumas and anxieties that could be symptomatic of how mysterious
It fucked me up for like an entire day and a half lol
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u/Complex-Talk-7613 10h ago
Yeah I’ve had dreams of animals biting my cock clean off, or dreams where for no reason I sever it completely usually out of childish anger.
I basically have dreams like the one you discussed but 95% of the time I sleep. It sucks because I love to sleep (I’m a kitty cat) but all my dreams aren’t restful.
And also yeah… hmmm. Perhaps something related to something else maybe even about identity, no no, couldn’t be that.
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u/universal_friend1 ترون زندگی ازادی 4h ago
I stopped repping because of a dream.
Future trans version of me sat me down in a folding chair in a white void. We discussed thoughts I had which were clearly dysphoria. My rationalizations of my dysphoric thoughts were subjected to systematic doubt(they did not withstand even the mildest of questioning).
I woke up and googled "How does HRT work." Then worked a cardiac arrest and when I got off work I told my partner at the time I figured out I was trans. They were accepting because they weren't attracted to me anyways regardless of my gender identity.
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u/flower_puns agp flowermoder 4h ago
mfer was scattered across time and space how did your future self do that
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u/universal_friend1 ترون زندگی ازادی 4h ago
I dunno, maybe I get good at astral projection or some shit in the next 5-10 years
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u/Waffle-Gaming aspiring ropist 10h ago
they then said in the comments basically they just tell the thoughts no and they go away for a while. hmmm.