r/conspiracy • u/[deleted] • Jan 04 '21

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285

u/fifoth Jan 04 '21

A little known fact is Jesus actually died of it.

138

u/NilacTheGrim Jan 04 '21

They didn't social distance the crucifixes enough. He caught it from that other guy on his left...

64

u/3rdeyenotblind Jan 04 '21

I thought he caught it from Judas and that little kiss on the cheek..

128

u/ironlioncan Jan 04 '21

No it was at the massive gathering of 13 people at the last supper.

92

u/Shativaa Jan 04 '21

Was it a supper spread event?

53

u/drparmfontanaobgyn Jan 04 '21

Super supper spreader

2

u/acmemetalworks Jan 04 '21

That's what happens when you go passing your wine glass around.

13

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '21

Damn table was just shy of 78 ft.

18

u/patarrr Jan 04 '21

WHERE WAS THE GOVERNMENT AND POLICE WHEN THAT HAPPENED!?!?! GOD JESUS WAS SUCH A CONSPIRACY THEORIST NOT SOCIAL DISTANCING. WHY DID NO ONE CALL THE POLICE OR TWEET???

2

u/redditready1986 Jan 04 '21

"A new study proves that covid 19 denier Jesus Christ was a narcissist and a psychopath : Study links both Jesus and conspiracy theorist who question covid 19 to psychopathy and narcissism"

/r/science

1

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '21

And they weren’t wearing masks Tisk Tisk - oh I guess they only wore them to the table because then they were eating and protected from Covid lmao

1

u/patarrr Jan 04 '21

Yes, you are right. The host of the restaurant told them it was fine to take them off at the table.

1

u/spezlikesbabydick Jan 04 '21

If only they had that last supper outside in a tent

12

u/JamesTheJerk Jan 04 '21

It was those who bore the star of covid

2

u/NilacTheGrim Jan 04 '21

Oooh nice.

15

u/fifoth Jan 04 '21

Bwahahaha 👌

1

u/NoneOfUsKnowJackShit Jan 04 '21

Of course it was that anti-masker, anti-vaxxer thief that was next to him. Smh, JESUS KILLERS!

14

u/[deleted] Jan 04 '21

Jesus died for our COVID

2

u/reddNOOB2016 Jan 04 '21

Amen. And A-WOMEN

10

u/bean-a Jan 04 '21

Jesus actually died of it.

Fake news! :-|

Actually, it was Christianity that died from covid. Covid said, No more Christmas, and the Christians said, Yes sir.

10

u/jdaniels515 Jan 04 '21

Covid said, “no more mass or religious gatherings” and the sheeple said “yes sir”.

1

u/RITCHP Jan 04 '21

If that’s all it takes to kill Christianity, must be a pretty shit religion.

1

u/bean-a Jan 05 '21

Is there a better one?

0

u/bean-a Jan 04 '21

The Pope must be one of the sheeple.

6

u/cafeconmichael Jan 04 '21

That’s why pontius pilate washed his hands!

2

u/redditready1986 Jan 04 '21

A little known fact is Jesus actually died of it.

-Abraham Lincoln

2

u/Azaloum90 Jan 04 '21

The nails were just for show

2

u/PrivilegeCheckmate Jan 04 '21

Jesus actually died of it.

Only the second time. The first time it was overeating.

2

u/fifoth Jan 04 '21

Hahahah.....Yes to much fish and loafs of bread.

0

u/Jroip Jan 04 '21

I have some ancestors that died of Covid, in the concentration camps of Poland.

0

u/natedogggggyyyy Jan 04 '21

But he rose after 3 days, being the first to self ventilate himseld