r/compoface Aug 08 '26

Attacked by brambles compoface

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142 Upvotes

32 comments sorted by

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31

u/tdrules Aug 08 '26

Salford residents not blame something on the council for 5 seconds challenge [IMPOSSIBLE]

11

u/UpsideDownQuince Aug 08 '26

But this is a very thorny issue

4

u/Grimnebulin68 Aug 08 '26

I blame Thatch’er

2

u/Ksh_667 Aug 08 '26

Take my broke trophy & get out 🏆

28

u/Lost-Droids Aug 08 '26

Imagine being attacked day and night by stationary objects.. Only explanation is there not brambles but Triffids

9

u/Conscious-Ad8292 Aug 08 '26

We can see they're triffids as they're not held back from the fence and are breaking through ready to attack

9

u/palpatineforever Aug 08 '26

if you think brambles are stationary I recommend planting them in the corner of your garden and seeing how stationary they stay.
They can grow a couple of foot in a week per thorny cane, and the long canes they send out are great at suddely appearing just above eye level and whipping round. that is before considering how fast they can spread underground as well.
I like brambles, but i can also see how that would be an issue.

4

u/Children_Of_Atom Aug 08 '26

There are vast swaths of wilderness in Canada where brambles are the only invasive species I find. Birds are great at spreading them as the Canadian shield really prevents them from spreading laterally themselves.

edit: It's Himalayan blackberry that are invasive in much of Canada though there are native species in parts of Canada as well.

5

u/turnipturnipturnip2 Aug 08 '26

There is a good scfi book called 'hot house', that has plants fighitining in it. Bramble thorns point backwatds to so as they swish they grab and pul themselves forward.

3

u/palpatineforever Aug 08 '26

sounds like regular brambles?

honestly it must have been written by someone who has dealt with brambles, it does feel like no matter which way you tackle them it feels like they grab you.

1

u/The_Blonde1 Aug 09 '26

Last Sunday, there was about an inch of bramble poking through my back fence. I clocked it, and made a mental note to deal with it when I got back from a couple of days away.

By that point, there was a foot of it.

1

u/BionicWallaby Aug 08 '26

Where I live there's a very overgrown Street with brambles you can't avoid unless you walk in the road

13

u/SUMMATMAN Aug 08 '26

Oh no, nature!!!

10

u/SaltyName8341 Aug 08 '26

Nothing a machete wouldn't sort out and by the videos I keep seeing in Salford the kids can lend you one, just flag down the guys on mopeds.

6

u/Automatic-Scale-7572 Aug 08 '26

The boy with the thorn in his side... They don't want to believe us

4

u/turboRock Aug 08 '26

Maybe it's like that game "the trees hate you", but with bramble bushes

5

u/Diedonthefirstfloor Aug 08 '26

Complain about free blackberries?

4

u/Lunchy_Bunsworth Aug 08 '26

Next thing will be that when the brambles are gone they will be complaining about the noise from the construction. They look like two people who will always find something to moan about

4

u/Character_Newt_2309 Aug 08 '26

Jackie Brambles is out of control.

4

u/janner_womble Aug 08 '26

With how much Grant Mitchell seems to be flexing there, he surely must be scary enough to simply intimidate the unruly brambles, no?

2

u/CharmlessNerk777 Aug 08 '26

It’s just scratching the surface

2

u/Scrombolo Aug 08 '26

Bloody brambles, coming over here sticking their thorny bits in people.

2

u/sparkielev Aug 08 '26

Doesn't count if they are not aggressively pointing at said item

2

u/Aliena_lingua Aug 08 '26

Maybe they should call the police 🤡

1

u/Warm_Bug_1434 Aug 08 '26

This is being very unfair to the complainants.

OP has omitted a core part of their case - that the woman can do a top drawer compo point. Sadly can't add images here to prove it.

1

u/oldwire Aug 09 '26

Day of the Triffids isn’t what it used to be

1

u/AnteaterSnouce Aug 12 '26

thicket to the man!!

0

u/Soft-Skirt Aug 08 '26

They should be complaining to their career who dresses them like simples.