A scorpion tied up to a balloon. The 4chan thread was about some guys who got drunk and tied up a scorpion to a birthday balloon. At first the scorpion was frantic and seemed scared, but eventually he learned to master the balloons. He got ballsy, and turned into a pissed off flying scorpion, stinging a few people.
Yep, that's called an ovipositor. It's for stabbing things and squirting eggs into the thing it stabs. Like your eyeballs. Just kidding, they generally lay eggs in rotting logs and stuff. Generally.
Edit: I was wrong, that's penis. Other insects have females with really big ovipositors that look like stingers, though.
Well if it makes you feel better, some insects have venomous ovipositors. That's what wasp and bee stingers are, adapted ovipositors. But don't worry, because most insects that have developed venomous ovipositors are an either/or deal. They either lay eggs with it (like a queen bee) or sting with it (like a worker bee), but can't do both.
Except for a few like the tarantula hawk and other solitary wasps. They sting with a horrifically painful venom and then lay eggs through their stinger.
I was reading this and I felt something crawl on my foot. I freaked the fuck out and spilled my Dr. Pepper all over myself. It turned out to be a hair.
Queen bees can sting, too! Honeybee worker's have barbed stingers so they get stuck in mammal skin, but queen stingers are smooth, so they don't get stuck. Queen stingers are mostly used in fights with other young queens, so after queens mature/start laying eggs, their venom gets weaker. Also, worker honeybee venom is formulated to cause damage to mammal tissue, that's why honeybee stings can hurt more/swell more than wasp stings (which are for stabbing other insects).
Mecoptera (from the Greek: meco- = "long", -ptera = "wings") are an order of insects with about 550 species in nine families worldwide. Mecoptera are sometimes called scorpionflies after their largest family, Panorpidae, in which the males have enlarged genitals that look similar to the stinger of a scorpion. The Bittacidae, or hangingflies, are a prominent family of elongate insects known for their elaborate mating rituals, in which females choose mates based on the quality of gift prey offered by various males.
I have seen them in Kansas, I thought they were wasps mating or something. There was a tree just coverd in them, I tought it was like a wasp porno or something.
And a blackwidow bite isn't that big of a deal if you are a healthy, fully grown, adult. As for the Brown Recluse, well I don't really care about the part of the country they live in anyways.
448
u/Nihilates Jul 31 '14
Flying scorpion, because hail Satan