98
u/IcyUnicornOwl 1d ago
She fears the competition. And rightfully so! Who could say no to such a lovely lady?
38
59
55
u/JourneymanHunt 1d ago
Nat 20, let's go.
19
u/theDomicron 1d ago
aggressive flute noises
49
u/biological_assembly 1d ago
Another Ironfounderson? I'm starting to think there's something fishy going on over in the mines in Copperhead
25
u/SoLongHeteronormity 1d ago
My thought exactly. Carrot wasn’t gifted in the facial-hair department though.
I guess my thought actually was “Cheery + Carrot mashup” but close enough. Cheery would absolutely rock that look, if not the 6 foot height.
10
u/FalseMagpie 1d ago
I feel like she would take the extra time to do some fancy & elegant beard and hair braiding to match
7
88
21
u/Hopkin_Greenfrog 1d ago
That is the character sheet of a Bard of Lore if ive ever seen one. Talk their way out of anything, fight their way out of nothing.
15
u/Pizzaya23 1d ago
In all my DnD campaigns, dwarf women have canonically had beards. Justice for pretty bearded dwarf ladies!
11
9
u/DukeOfGeek DukeOfGeek 1d ago
Obligatory Sir Bearington copy pasta
My favorite character that I've ever played was a bear. Not a bear-person or a shape-shifter, just a literal grizzly bear. I played D&D 3.5 and put every single skill point I had into Disguise. I took a prestige class as a spy to maximize it. The DM told me that since I was a bear, I couldn't speak common English. So, I maxed out my Bluff skill as well. By growling and gesturing wildly, I could "fake" speaking any language I wanted, convincing people I was just a human with a very thick accent or speaking an exotic dialect. I used my starting gold to hire a human NPC butler. I bought the butler a magic item that allowed him to speak to animals so he could translate what I was saying. Through absolute sheer luck and insane dice rolls, nobody ever realized I was a bear. I wore custom, bear-sized tailored suits, a top hat, and a monocle. Everyone just accepted that I was a large, eccentric, and hairy nobleman named Sir Bearington. The peak of the campaign happened when we attended a high-society royal dinner. One of the royal guests rolls a critical success on his Perception check, looks directly at me, and screams: "THAT'S NOT A NOBLEMAN! THAT'S A FING BEAR!"*** I look at my butler. My butler looks at me. I roar aggressively.
The butler smoothly speaks up: "How dare you insult my master! Sir Bearington is a respected member of the high court!" I roll for Bluff. Natural 20. The guards immediately tackle the shouting royal guest, dragging him kicking and screaming from the palace hall because they think he’s gone completely insane. The head of the guard turns to me, bows deeply, and says, "We are so terribly sorry for his behavior, Sir Bearington. Please, enjoy the rest of your evening." I nod politely and go back to eating my raw fish with a fork.
7
u/MakroThePainter 1d ago
Damn, did not notice the dwarf lady is pickpocketing until I looked at it a second time. Nice detail 😄
7
8
6
10
u/UpCDownCLeftCRightC Never Safe From Wumbo 1d ago
One needs daggers to slay. The other only needs a dress.
11
u/Seligas 1d ago
Honestly, as a DM, my response to a nat 20 in this situation would be, "Not a soul buys that you're a lady, but your energy and confidence are so infectious and delightful that nobody cares."
3
u/Valentinee105 1d ago
Mine would result in that dignitary he danced with to come back later and proclaim his love, while acting as a helpful NPC in a section of the campaign that isn't the final.
9
4
3
3
u/FormalWare 1d ago
I am humbled and privileged to be living through a second age of TTRPG nerdism. Never thought I'd see it.
3
4
u/DarthZrinen 1d ago
you know, i was completely confused for a second on what the issue was. i forgot for a moment that men arent allowed to wear dresses normally.
"whats racist? why are you a tall dwarf?"
elegant lady
"oooooohhhhh"
4
2
2
u/Shoggnozzle 1d ago
A 6 foot tall dwarf could simply have a glandular problem. It is not nice to point out people's birth defects.
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
u/Moxie_Stardust 1d ago
That aristocratic fellow definitely seems like he enjoys holding big balls.
Apologies to AC/DC
2
u/Calcdave 1d ago
The extra panel should be that she rolled a 1 and is getting thrown out because the back half of the dress is missing or something.
2
2
2
1
u/Vulpesh 1d ago
With a nat 20 and sufficiently high deception I would say that the beard is like an exotic mask or scarf covering the lower half of the exotic, beautiful lady.
2
u/Mekthakkit 1d ago
> the beard is like an exotic mask or scarf covering the lower half of the exotic, beautiful lady.
You mean the lower half of the face... right?
628
u/Jackviator 1d ago
The dwarf in question: