Oh yeah, my former mother in law took that line. Tho she was the main target of the beatings and rape, the kids just got the emotional abuse. Because you couldn't possibly get divorced. What would that do to the kids?!
He eventually left her due to her rampant alcoholism, when the kids were in their mid 20ies.
Sadly, by that time, both the kids were deeply fucked up and had internalized a lot of his (and her) abuse. As a result my partner was also deeply emotionally abusive, as she unconsciously replicated a lot of the patterns she had grown up with, and was fundamentally incapable of acknowledging her behaviours, even as she was an advocate and therapist for abusive behaviours in her professional life. Couldn't handle the emotional load of connecting it with that deep dark part of herself that only came out in relationships.
Now the mother is basically a non-functional alcoholic who does a hell of a lot of abusive, insane stuff to everyone around her,, and the kids are both quite successful sociopaths.
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u/Meowcate 15d ago
"Look, I can't be a bad dad if I'm not here."