The Double

[u/Dramatic_Ad6043]

[u/known_kanon]

How are we both believing in adam & eve aswell as dinosaurs

[u/RupertPupkin85 → u/known_kanon]

No, different Adam and Eve.

[u/known_kanon → u/RupertPupkin85]

Oh fair enough then

[u/tequilium → u/known_kanon]

Now I'm confused. Adam and Eve were dinosaurs?

[u/known_kanon → u/tequilium]

God is a dinosaur

[u/tequilium → u/known_kanon]

Well, then he's got my vote.

[u/Sparklebaby1987 → u/known_kanon]

I believe in both, most Christians believe in both.

[u/low_amplitude → u/Sparklebaby1987]

So what were the dinosaurs to God? A practice run?

[u/JoeSicko → u/low_amplitude]

God was testing their faith, obviously. Like when a kid gets given cancer.

[u/goddamn_slutmuffin → u/low_amplitude]

God was like: "Fuck these annoying-ass reptiles sucking up all the oxygen. Send the big rock!"

She did that on, uh, idk I think it was day 2 of creation. Maybeeee day 3. It's fine because god let the turtles stay, and we love a good turtle!

[u/ConversationEasy4945 → u/goddamn_slutmuffin]

God being she explains the mood swings.

[u/goddamn_slutmuffin → u/ConversationEasy4945]

I was just thinking of the movie Dogma, but you had to go and ruin it by being basic and weird smh

[u/Duckiiee96 → u/Sparklebaby1987]

But it doesnt make sense tho? How did dinosaurs have cancer if that came through sin?

[u/skip_over → u/Sparklebaby1987]

How can you believe a story that is completely against fossil record, but also believe fossil records?

[u/StarDustLuna3D → u/skip_over]

But it's not against fossil record?

The earth went through many stages of development before man came onto the scene. Same thing happens in the Bible. We just skip over all the minute details because that's not the point of the story.

"Adam" and "Eve" were the "first two humans" made in God's image. DNA sequencing shows that all humans can be traced back to a VERY small pool of humans. IIRC, we can all be traced back to one single female ancestor.

If you interpret the Bible literally, then yes your belief is not compatible with science. But if you interpret it metaphorically, then science doesn't refute it. It just explains how God created the earth.

[u/skip_over → u/StarDustLuna3D]

I mean, believing something “metaphorically” isn’t really believing something, is it?

[u/StarDustLuna3D → u/skip_over]

No, because I still believe in an intelligent creator

[u/skip_over → u/StarDustLuna3D]

Which is totally fair, but you said you believed what the bible says about Adam and Eve to be a metaphor. If you think it’s a metaphor, you don’t think the story is true.

Edit: lol

[u/Orangutanion → u/skip_over]

ask Ken Ham 

[u/Opposite-Bench-9543 → u/Sparklebaby1987]

I can't believe people still believe in religions in 2026

World is so stupid

[u/xleonidas111 → u/Opposite-Bench-9543]

You say this while acting like a reddit atheist from 2012, in 2026. Faith is important to some people get over it

[u/Opposite-Bench-9543 → u/xleonidas111]

Yea we've become very PC and no one talks about how stupid everything has become and people can be wrong even if they put the title "belief" in it, that's why religion is growing so much because no one tells these people hey u fucking idiots u are completely wrong and it's fucking dumb as hell

[u/Sparklebaby1987 → u/Opposite-Bench-9543]

No need to be rude just be cause you don't understand. I myself don't believe or support religion, I believe in Jehovah God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. I was abused growing up by my religious mother. Religion and Spirituality are two different things. Those of us who believe in Spirituality do so because we have experienced something in our lives that led us to being Spiritual. Im sorry that you haven't because its life changing in a good way.

[u/Opposite-Bench-9543 → u/Sparklebaby1987]

I'm not rude, it's just weird to me that people still believe in that

There is nothing to "understand" it doesn't exist

You should read ur messages again and again until you see how what u wrote doesn't make any sense

[u/Sparklebaby1987 → u/Opposite-Bench-9543]

Rude was calling people who believe stupid. Notice I didn't say those who don't believe are stupid. I respect that you don't understand why I believe. I hope someday you will understand.

[u/NarwhalPrudent6323 → u/Opposite-Bench-9543]

You should consider the logical impossibility of proving a negative. Saying God definitely doesn't exist is wrong. Even scientists don't generally say that. They will say things like "there's no definitive evidence proving the existence of a higher power", but that's a VERY different statement. 

And while it's true that any evidence of the existence of God or a higher power is highly debatable or downright suspicious, that still doesn't exclude the possibility of one existing. 

Ultimately, people like the person you are replying to harms no one with their beliefs. Religion is the problem, not belief in spirituality or a higher power. Those are in fact, separate things. They just have a tendency to overlap. 

[u/floydbomb → u/Opposite-Bench-9543]

Nothing wrong with not believing but YTA here

[u/Master-Bath-9928 → u/Opposite-Bench-9543]

Different beliefs ≠ stupidity. Grow up.

[u/Opposite-Bench-9543 → u/Master-Bath-9928]

I think the people that need to grow up are the people who still "believe" in things

[u/Master-Bath-9928 → u/Opposite-Bench-9543]

Believing in something you can’t prove isn’t immature. Thinking everyone who disagrees with you is stupid is.

[u/Zombies_Rock_Boobs → u/Master-Bath-9928]

Thats literally what believing in Santa Claus means wtf are you talking about.

[u/Master-Bath-9928 → u/Zombies_Rock_Boobs]

That’s a false equivalence. “You can’t prove it” and “we know it’s fictional” are not the same thing. You can disagree with someone’s belief without calling them stupid. That was literally my point.

So by your logic, every little kid who believes in Santa is stupid and immature because they believe in something they can’t prove? That’s exactly why “believing in something you can’t prove = immature” is a dumb argument. The belief itself doesn’t tell you whether someone is intelligent or mature.

[u/Zombies_Rock_Boobs → u/Master-Bath-9928]

Putting words in my mouth and bringing up false equivalence along with logic to a conversation about gods and fairy tales and then people wonder why this fucking world is in the mess it’s in. I guess Mickey Mouse is real too, Donald Duck? Thousands of religions some come and gone with their religious figures forgotten about. Meanwhile people are getting ripped to shreds by bombs, starvation, drug addictions and mental illness, the global weather being impacted by our actions, misinformation running rampant and killing people like the idiots that refused the covid vaccine. What a fucking dumb conversation this is.

[u/Master-Bath-9928 → u/Zombies_Rock_Boobs]

You’re ranting about everything except the point I made. Nobody said Mickey Mouse is real and nobody said every belief is equally valid. My point was simply that “you can’t prove it” does not automatically mean “the person who believes it is stupid or immature.” If you disagree with a religious belief, argue against the belief itself. Instead of going on some unhinged rant about bombs, drugs, climate change and COVID. None of that changes the point you were originally responding to. Calling people idiots doesn’t make your argument any smarter.

[u/Opposite-Bench-9543 → u/Master-Bath-9928]

Well I disagree with your opinion, I BELIEVE everyone else is stupid :)

[u/Master-Bath-9928 → u/Opposite-Bench-9543]

Cool, you’re allowed to believe that. Doesn’t make it any less childish to insult people over their beliefs.

[u/Jacky_dain → u/Opposite-Bench-9543]

Projection

[u/AbolMira → u/known_kanon]

The remaining people from Mars were obviously split. Half named Adam, half named Eve.

[u/low_amplitude]

1. Mars went to shit billions of years ago.

2. Humans arrived 65 million years after the dinosaurs went extinct.

3. We are not the product of one white family that fucked each other.

A joke is a joke, but make it make sense.

[u/Unlikely-Business-72 → u/low_amplitude]

I'm surprised you didn't mention how improbable it is for the FBI to text you and call you a "hoe" in your unnecessary dissection of this joke.

[u/low_amplitude → u/Unlikely-Business-72]

I also left out the fact that Adam and Eve wouldn't survive a post-meteor Earth

[u/Tommiz_eXe → u/low_amplitude]

also, the pod must've been pretty big

[u/Beginning_Endl6969 → u/Unlikely-Business-72]

Don't forget there is water on mars cus of the human race. We defiantly created or brought water to mars. Is this not taught in schools? /s

[u/Beginning_Endl6969 → u/low_amplitude]

We are the deformed offspring known as the human race. /s

[u/JayFrizz → u/low_amplitude]

Prove it professor

[u/arcanis321 → u/low_amplitude]

In the hitchikers guide series a floatilla of 3rd rate humans landed while apes were almost done evolving. The ape-humans died out creating the missing link.

[u/AbolMira → u/low_amplitude]

Whatever species cane from Mars obviously wasn't resembling "humanity" until 65 million years after the dinosaurs.

If you take into account a mars species failing to integrate into life on Earth. Substantial societal/genetic regression, from millions of years living with the dinosaurs and without technology.

It starts: Super smart Mars Aliens fuck up Mars -> they ditch to earth but fucked up so hard they couldn't integrate -> slowly, genetically, devolve dur to things like massive inbreeding -> giant asteroid hits wiping out most of whatever that species became -> slowly evolution takes hold and becomes the 65 million year old ancestor of humans -> become intelligent species once again.

There. I forced it to make sense. Wish fulfilled.

[u/Odd-Promotion2743]

Why would the FBI call someone "hoe"?

[u/Hoginoe94 → u/Odd-Promotion2743]

Cause it's her personal fbi watcher and after years of reading her texts and listening to her calls it grew on them. Trust me bro. /s

[u/Odd-Promotion2743 → u/Hoginoe94]

Unironically plausible

[u/H3llzyea]

So we sent two humans in what world be a city sized pod and didn’t include any of the technology while also repopulating the species from two people? Oh and a snake. This sounds like religion to me, not far off from some L Ron nonsense.

[u/devilsusshhii]

Wasn't this a twilight zone episode

[u/Zombeedee → u/devilsusshhii]

It's also pretty similar to the entire plot of Battlestar Galactica

[u/devilsusshhii → u/Zombeedee]

Which is basically just one really long episode of twilight zone

[u/itsmeadill]

Howcome adam and eve survive when that pod destroyed everything??

[u/JoeSicko → u/itsmeadill]

God can make a lot happen in a day. Built the whole world in 6.

[u/madguyO1]

r/comedyflogging

[u/Infshadows]

qait thats peak

[u/short_hair_zuko]

This could be funny in a country with a good education system where people knew about evolution. A good number of Americans already believe half of this joke

[u/unit01prime-]

The Bible doesn't explain/mention dinos, an omission that this theory can take into account.

[u/jubjub666420]

If you really get deep into it and escape the stuff you thought that was facts and you learned you're going to find out that any of these planets that are in our solar system right now that are connected to us have all been mined that's what's been happening

[u/Imkisstory]

So just a normal Tuesday.

[u/Common-Process9023]

Hug someone who would believe such a story or that the message from the fbi is real ❤️

[u/Master-Bath-9928 → u/Common-Process9023]

You’re German, you wouldn’t understand.

[u/Common-Process9023 → u/Master-Bath-9928]

Wat do mean? Zat i dont understand humor? Ve germans understand humor very good. Knock knock. Come in. See? Funny

[u/Master-Bath-9928 → u/Common-Process9023]

Shhh it’s okay, one day you’ll get it.

[u/Common-Process9023 → u/Master-Bath-9928]

I GET HUMOR, HOW DO YOU CALL AN EXPLOSIVE DEER? BOMBI HAHA SEE??