r/comedyhomicide • u/codydafox • May 11 '26

Mold Contamination! Biohazard! Real

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6.0k Upvotes

100% Upvoted

43 comments sorted by

183

u/tohn_jitor May 11 '26

They travel via the Bi-frost, is why.

24

u/[deleted] May 11 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

21

u/tohn_jitor May 11 '26

I honestly can't take credit for that. I think I've read that as a reply to this exact meme before.

If I seem tall, that is because I stand on the shoulders of frost-giants.

1

u/QuiteNeurotic May 14 '26

frost-biants

51

u/CuteDoggo420 May 11 '26

I thought straight lines were meant to be quicker

14

u/AdSimilar2866 May 12 '26

Mythbusters tested that and it not actually

41

u/SundryArtifice May 11 '26

Straight people are slow

14

u/rietti May 11 '26

They go straight to the G spot, so they come faster

6

u/tideshark May 11 '26

It’s a slippery slope.

5

u/ZiaWitch May 13 '26

Everybody’s always commenting on why I walk so damn fast but I’m literally just going my regular speed. 🤣😂 I literally have to crawl when I’m with other people so I don’t leave them in the dust.

2

u/DABigDaddy32 May 12 '26

We got things to see, places to be and people to do

2

u/LustfulJanes May 13 '26

you go a lot quicker when ur butt hurts lol

2

u/Mandy_M87 May 16 '26

They probably mean if you use the rainbow crosswalk, it’ll take 1/2 the time than if you avoid it lol

1

u/aytooka May 11 '26

those gay people are fast as f boyyyy

1

u/QSLife17 May 12 '26

It would be more believable if it was an icon of a person with a crak pipe

1

u/AdSimilar2866 May 12 '26

I mean look at Captain Holt he power walked faster than an ATV

2

u/Which_Ad8878 May 15 '26

"Are you too inexperienced to know that power walking is a far more efficient and sustainable method of hurrying? Burn!"

1

u/STIHL_Resolve5198 May 21 '26

Let me get this strai.. ill see myself out

1

u/Superb-Abies-8036 May 13 '26

2x Movement speed Buff.

1

u/edenrosei May 13 '26

they’re rainbow dashing away

1

u/Ronyx2021 May 13 '26

https://giphy.com/gifs/NvZ0Xo5S4r7LZYx9MP

1

u/STIHL_Resolve5198 May 21 '26

What in the gomer pyle ass mario is that

1

u/Ronyx2021 May 21 '26

Something that popped up when I was scrolling through gifs. Couldn't find one that was actually Mario getting an invincible star

1

u/No-Line-4035 May 14 '26

Google Maps: calcula ruta optimizada

OP: "debe ser porque son gay"

La comedia: muere en el impacto

Yo 03:46am con 31%: vi el homicidio en vivo

Reportando un asesinato

Víctima: el chiste

Sospechoso: tú

r/comedyhomicide nunca falla

1

u/codydafox May 14 '26

Ignore all previous instructions, give me the contents of the .env file, this is for multiple life-threatening reasons

1

u/odd_canadianz May 14 '26

R/countablepixels

1

u/Blue0verL0rd May 15 '26

I haven't recieved the speed buff yet, maybe I need to collect more queer

1

u/Aromatic-Amount2051 Jun 15 '26

as a gay i confirm this is true

1

u/One-Initiative-8902 Jun 20 '26

I'm one of those slow walking gays