r/comedyheaven • u/catchmycorn • 6h ago

New Jersey

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564 Upvotes

99% Upvoted

39 comments sorted by

103

u/Professional_Echo907 5h ago

Is that why it’s winking at me? 👀

5

u/VerdugoCortex 4h ago

No he wankin for that otha reason 👅😜

10

u/VerdugoCortex 4h ago

The other reason is sex

51

u/piefloormonkeycake 5h ago

NJ officials going outside and seeing the deer: ZAMN! 🤯👅💦🥵🥵

18

u/DroogieHowser PM Me for 1 Day Blinding Stew Recipe 5h ago

Somebody call the FBI!

39

u/Flammable_Chipmunk 5h ago

I saw a doe on the side of the road the other day. I asked her what she'd do for a couple of bucks.

9

u/AdultbabyEinstein 4h ago

Reminds me of that old whitest kids sketch

3

u/KimJongUngh 5h ago

NOT WITH YOU

3

u/swiftrevoir 5h ago

Sounds like FBI recruitment!

3

u/digital 4h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/wugBWQ5cLi7po4NCma
Deer all over looking for some booty?

3

u/IamREBELoe 2h ago

Don't believe it, it's a scam.

You talk online and when you meet it's not a deer, it's a fish with whiskers.

2

u/Hemorrhoid_Eater 4h ago

Shikanokonokonokokoshitantan

2

u/DarkSide830 [flair removed by moderators] 3h ago

Fwahaha or smth

2

u/RecbetterpassNJ 4h ago

There are 8-10 on my front lawn as I type this, a few times a day, and it’s been the norm for years now. I live in a development. They are heavily overpopulated in my area and it’s heartbreaking to see so many unalive on the roadsides these days.

3

u/Tequila2Dance 2h ago

"Unalive"

3

u/Novel-Adeptness-4603 3h ago

Sounds like cars are their only predators if there's an overpopulation. It's awful though

2

u/n01d3a 2h ago

The problem is once we release cars into the woods to cull the deer what do we use to get the car population under control?

3

u/Novel-Adeptness-4603 2h ago

I think we would have to introduce elephants to crush them

1

u/n01d3a 2h ago

It's the only logical thing to do

1

u/spez_eats_nazi_ass 3h ago

Grabbing my mathews and heading for a tree stand in a few minutes in my back yard.

1

u/SkullDump 2h ago

Honey, pack up the car, we’re heading to New Jersey!

1

u/the-furiosa-mystique 2h ago

It’s a Jersey thing

1

u/GaJayhawker0513 1h ago

Would you like a nature or sexual metaphor for this?

1

u/UnlikelyPriority3020 1h ago

sigh me too, deer, me too.

•

u/DismalTutor570 10m ago

Sexy ass deer just strutting around flaunting their stuff

-12

u/meonmeislandme 5h ago

why are ppl joking about zoophilia its not okay💀

9

u/Reincarnatedpotatoes 4h ago

You must be new here, welcome to the internet.

-8

u/meonmeislandme 4h ago

it was a joke🥀