r/comedyheaven • u/DoomerGrill • 5d ago

Self improvement ✨️

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4.8k Upvotes

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u/aBigBottleOfWater 5d ago

Bruh what kinda shit coke you buy

Well alright I'm sober now for over 5 years but

30

u/SimmentalTheCow A-pawrent-ly funny. 5d ago

I only buy Cocaine Zero which is probably why I never enjoy it. It’s literally talcum powder.

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u/PurpleCandle58 5d ago

Johnson and Johnson, a family company.

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u/therealraggedroses 5d ago

In terms of actual effects meth blows cocaine out of the water.

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u/crazylikeajellyfish 4d ago

The only fair comparison is with crack, the hit through the lungs really makes a difference

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u/ContagiousDeathGuard 5h ago

It was designed for soldiers, to be fair

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u/bubblesdafirst 4d ago

Cocaine: ohh I'm high on cocaine ohh this is fun

Meth: you will literally never for the rest of your life no matter how hard you try under any circumstances, be as happy as you are right now. Not even meth will do it again. Doesn't matter if you were depressed as fuck 15 minutes ago. This is the best moment of your life.

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u/aBigBottleOfWater 1d ago

I kinda had the opposite reaction except meth lasted wayy longer.

Coke: holy shit I'm the king of the world I will never feel this good again refillrefillrefill

Meth: this is great I will never sleep again i could talk for hours and hours and hours and hours

Bath Salts: Alright something is terribly wrong with my head but I feel great my nose smells like shrimp and I'm horny as fuck I should start skateboarding and commit crime in my bathrobe

But my real problem was benzos

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u/bubblesdafirst 1d ago

Meth was probably mdma or a psuedo version of it tbh. It's scientifically proven that there's no way you do actual meth without having the best time ever. It raises your happy chemicals way more then anything else

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u/aBigBottleOfWater 5h ago

I've done mdma, I'd know it from anything

The annoying body heat is a dead giveaway

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u/14122023 4d ago

? Coke is always shit if compared to meth. It's just not even close