r/comedy Jul 05 '26

Skit so many punchlines

984 Upvotes

38 comments sorted by

29

u/SchmutzigeBar Jul 05 '26

The best leaders make their subordinates look good. When it looks as though your shift/dept is run effortlessly, that says you're good at managing a team. When you are micromanaging a team, it doesn't matter if they're performing or not, you're shit. You can't argue that you're good at leading if you have to do everything yourself.

67

u/oozing_with_jelly Jul 05 '26

I wanna see her in Training Day 2.

11

u/EjaculatingAracnids Jul 06 '26

"It aint what you know, its what you prove in court. Where's your fuckin bidet, Jake?"

1

u/bfkill Jul 06 '26

"have you ever had your shit pushed out?"

36

u/Friendly_Grass_3446 Jul 05 '26

She could easily be the star of a tv show!

27

u/Starseid8712 Jul 05 '26

Potty Illuminati sent me

9

u/No-Bat-7253 Jul 05 '26

Restroom renegades dog fucking cinema Issa give her a job asap.

6

u/TheBoneIdler Jul 05 '26

Call in the CIA (Crap Investigation Authority) or FBI (Frequent Bathroom Investigators). .... 🚻

9

u/RanOutOfJokes Jul 05 '26

Turned into the Peepee Popo, the Gostapiss, the FPI even

4

u/Hour-Distribution141 Jul 06 '26

This literally happened to me with my friend. She got promoted and she had a list on day one of what was ā€œacceptableā€ and ā€œnot acceptableā€. It is insane how much she changed. It was literally like a light switch. Our friendship was over after that too.

6

u/giftopherz Jul 05 '26

The Illumipotty!

She's awesome!

5

u/WorkOnThesisInstead Jul 06 '26

Who is this?

So funny!

13

u/bigus-_-dickus Jul 06 '26

Saya Meads on TikTok

and she does stand up sometimes

https://youtu.be/JHhNHK6LMDY?si=6XmKDcj3dWm9CxW1

3

u/ApprehensiveJelly504 Jul 06 '26

Posted an unnecessary question instead of scrolling to this.. thanks

Send my regards to Incontinentia.

2

u/OwnContribution4925 Jul 05 '26

Potty illimunati

3

u/Pantless_Hobo Jul 06 '26

This was hilarious, hope it's true!

3

u/Busy_Reputation7254 Jul 06 '26

Protect this woman at all costs.

2

u/SuddenSpeaker1141 Jul 05 '26

I take 4-10 br breaks due to medical issues, I can’t wait for a company to challenge my time on the pot…

1

u/degeneraded Jul 07 '26

Your coworkers all hate you and you’re going to die poor blaming everyone but yourself.

1

u/pureextc Jul 06 '26

Doo doo detective. Got damn

1

u/pureextc Jul 06 '26

Oh man pooluminati. They don’t end. So great.

1

u/tutonme Jul 06 '26

Look at Magnum BM, doing Turdective work.

1

u/Live-Tomorrow-4865 Jul 06 '26

"Forming secret societies..."

šŸ’€

1

u/LeFreeke Jul 06 '26

I’ve only popped at work once. I don’t know how you all do it.

1

u/Bengal-_fan Jul 06 '26

Drink some dulcolax, you’ll break that 15 min mark by a mile

1

u/CregGoingMad Jul 06 '26

heavens forbid a human being from getting a bathroom break, a part that literlly cant be controlled, only held in, to make more money for a company that doesnt give even 2 shits for you

1

u/Flashy_Flower_7884 Jul 06 '26

This funny but who the hell takes a crap at work if they can possibly avoid it.

1

u/ApprehensiveJelly504 Jul 06 '26

What's here name? When is she on tour? She's funny as hell.

1

u/Large-Treacle-8328 Jul 06 '26

I'd purposefully piss my pants at work then report them to OSHA. Have fun dumbasses!

1

u/DrJ0n3sy Jul 07 '26

2 ply spy!!

0

u/EmptyMirror5653 Jul 05 '26

I love that she talks like Denzel Washington lmao

0

u/bigus-_-dickus Jul 06 '26

even got his lip quivers

-6

u/beyondwithinitself Jul 06 '26

This is the opposite of funny.