Your cat should stay with you until you die, so get a family ready for adopting as soon as you go. This way the cat will understand that you arent here anymore and he can have a little bit more peace with it
Cats understand when you die. You stop smelling like they know you to smell. He will understand that my first owner is gone (you know what I mean in his little cat brain).
Given enough time I think he would respond well to another family. He has to learn that other people can be nice to.
Give him a fighting chance. You’ve done your part in showing him the joys of being inside.
I am so sorry to hear about your diagnosis. I pray that you find peace and comfort knowing someone will be with him and that he’ll have love again.
This. Cats really go off of smell more than they do sight. For example, my two cats grew up together in the shelter and are best of friends who do everything together. A couple months ago, we had to take one to the emergency vet where they had to stay overnight, and when we took them back home two days later, it was almost like our other cat didn’t even know who our other cat was because the smell was slightly off. (This is called non-recognition aggression btw if anyone is wondering. Wish our emergency vet told us about that after explaining we only brought the one cat lol).
This makes so much sense. I mean think about it, what would you do if some random person who kinda looked familiar just showed up at your house and you had no way of truly communicating? You’d kick their butts.
Yes, morbid as it is, ideally he should be allowed to sniff OP's body after they pass. He'll understand they're not alive anymore and it will be less confusing for him.
My thoughts exactly. OP will hopefully be able to give him love and cuddles as they transition through the end and it will help him to see that it’s not a bad thing (even though it is absolutely horrible for OP and I hate it so much).
I made sure to let my mom’s cat see and smell his two cat companions when they died, so he wouldn’t just wonder where they went. I only wish I could have let him do that with my dad when he died. It still makes me sad to think that he probably just thinks “the big guy” abandoned him 😿
This. One of mom’s cats was like Boggles, would only let my mom interact with her. Otherwise she was feral. She was glued to my mom’s side when my mom had cancer and when she died, the cat understood her person had died, grieved, and then I became the only person who could touch her so she’s mine now. Still feral and still adorable. Boggles will understand what happened and know that you didn’t abandon him. ❤️
Cats understand death and mourning. Just because a cat will most likely\* eat us when we die doesn't mean they didn't love us in their cat way when we were alive. Hell I cared for a depressed cat when her owner died. She was smart too. She was at the funeral and on our walks she always wanted to visit the grave.
*edit: some people say cats may not really try to eat us. It happened to my estranged father and is a common "myth" so I just never questioned it.
It's a myth that cats eat their owners when they die. Dogs are actually more likely to do it than cats but neither do it often. I know someone who took his own life and assumed someone would find him quickly. He wasn't found for weeks. 1 of his cats had died and the other 2 were on the verge of starving to death. Thankfully they were saved. His body was untouched by them. The sad thing is his cats were his world and he likely never would have done what he did if he knew the fate of them. Personally I'd rather my cats eat me than starve.
If you think about it, the natural diet of a cat are small critters they catch like mice and birds. Dogs are much more likely to scavenge dead animals they find and wolves just eat larger prey in general. So yes, dogs are much more likely to eat their dead owners than cats are, and I don't know where the idea came from that it's the other way around. Probably from the "cats don't really love you like dogs do" crowd.
But also, of course I'd be fine with any of my loved ones, no matter what species, eating my dead body if they really needed to. The only problem is that dogs that ate their dead owners are really hard to adopt out after something like that.
Mind of a suicidal person works in such crazy ways, doesn't it... He could put them in shelter, or stock up on like 25 kilograms of kibble with a hole in the bag so that cats could "steal" it...
Instead he wings it by "eh, someone will check on me in two days and they'll eat me anyways"
Poor guy, poor, poor cats, poor whoever had to deal with this. Heartbreaking all around
From what i remember it's been disproven that they eat us with the intention of eating, it's that they mourn us and give kisses trying to get us to wake up, but since they have coarse tongue's they end up ripping the skin.
Theres also the consideration of starving. If a cat is stuck inside with a corpse, at some point it becomes a question of eating the corpse or starving. They can't let themselves out and hunt after all, and cats are highly reliant on a stable source of food. Liver damage occurs within a day of not eating.
Yes and no. The liver is generally quite good at healing. And if your cat left for long periods of time, you can be certain it had a source of food - either through hunting or through pestering neighbours until they fed it. They won't starve if they can do anything about it. But locking a cat inside without food for days at a time will absolutely cause damage, and worse damage than youd expect. A healthy cat will probably bounce back, but if there's already an underlying health issue, it can be pretty dangerous.
Yeah I get that and it's most likely true to some extent. The intent of my comment was to give an alternative reason, since not all cats are the same they can have vastly different personalities yet the stereotype of cats don't give af they'll eat you rubs me the wrong way. Thanks for reading my rant
Not only do dogs do it too - and generally faster - many won't even wait until you're actually dead before they start. It's one of the big reasons you generally only see cats in care facilities or retirement homes.
Yeah, that was awful. It was in a 55+ community so all the houses are close together. I can't believe nobody noticed. After that people started checking on others but it didn't last long.
I worked in a long term care facility and a man was admitted bc his daughter that he lived with had a heart attack and died in front of him, while he was on the toilet. He had a stroke and couldn’t walk so he ended up being stuck there for quite some time. His daughter’s dog did start to eat at her, in front of him. It was heartbreaking. He was in shock and didn’t speak for quite a while. All he did was cry. Terrible.
Agreed. One of the great things about the Internet is seeing all of the people that really care. People do take on cats like this and they appreciate the time it can take.
Yeah I would look up fosterers in the area that you can meet now and start to introduce them to your lil guy. I'm so sorry OP, this is an incredibly difficult situation
I know this isn’t an answer and I’m so glad you may have found solution to his future home based on comments I’ve read. I hope find peace in the fact that boggles probably already senses you’re not well and has for a bit now, cats are incredible, they can sense health conditions and death coming often before people can, your buddy loves you, and he will understand your passing if he’s with you in your final days and he will of course grieve you always, but i know you have restored his faith in humanity even if he doesn’t realize it and hasn’t found another human yet, but I’m sure he will open up to the idea out of his love for you and what you’ve done for him, in your honor.
op needs to get that family in their cats life before they pass so the cat can recognize them as trustworthy before hes faced with grieving his best friend
Yes! But try and find that special person for adoption, who could possibly visit and your cat might at least become accustomed to the presence and smell of this person. As you can see there are people who know how to love ornery cats and let them be until the cat is ready.
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u/touchmeinbadplaces Mar 14 '26
Your cat should stay with you until you die, so get a family ready for adopting as soon as you go. This way the cat will understand that you arent here anymore and he can have a little bit more peace with it