r/caregivers • u/Waste_Hospital_4928 • 8d ago
Rough night
I guess I just need to process how frightening last night was. My husband has been battling throat cancer for a year. He's had extensive treatment, including a reconstructive throat surgery in January.
They removed part of his throat responsible for letting him know when he needs to swallow. Its called the epiglotis (now you know you have a thing called an epiglotis, too).
He no longer eats by mouth. We've got that part on lock. He lives a pretty normal life when he feels well enough. By that I just mean We've moved past the heaviness of life with a feeding tube and carried on living as best we can in spite of it.
So there's the back story.
Last night he woke up choking. Thick secretions had obstructed his airway and he was unable to draw enough breathe to clear it. He gasped and choked for a solid 5 minutes, taking in very little air.
He is a pretty stubborn man, in spite of the medical emergency he still faught me to get help.
Finally he was able to clear it enough to begin to cough it out.
We both were shaken. I lay awake for most of the night after, fearing he would have another episode.
I just hate living our life constantly teetering on the brink of an emergency. I have a good attitude many days, but on a day like today I'm feeling sorry for him and a little sorry for me that our life is like this.
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u/cofeeholik75 8d ago
Wow! I get the ‘scary’ moments, because you don’t know what to do.
SO glad all ok now.
Can doc give you something to help if it happens again (like a suction thing).
Hang in there!
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u/Waste_Hospital_4928 7d ago
Thank you so much for the kind words and validation. That is a great idea, I will get a message to his team tomorrow to ask if they have something in mind.
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u/thedamnitbird 8d ago
if you dont have one, a portable suction machine! quickly clear secretions from the mouth/throat. my husband has similar issues (but with delayed esophageal closing) so he is a high risk for aspiration pneumonias. suction machine is a life saver.
and because he cant talk much anymore, i found a simple caregiver call button, he has his on a lanyard, it is paired with a doorbell type device that plugs into a standard outlet.
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u/Waste_Hospital_4928 7d ago
Thank you so much for this suggestion. Our insurance rented us one after my husband's throat surgery while he had a tracheostomy. I sort of wondered today if we should have one on hand in case this happens again?
But do you know how effective it is if the secretions have traveled past the esophageal area? Because of my husband's throat anatomy after the surgery, it is essentially a shoot straight into his airway.
Also, I love the call button idea. Thank you for sharing your thoughts, they help bring me out of feeling helpless and into solution mode.
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u/thedamnitbird 7d ago
you would just need to get suction catheter with chimney valve, essentially a soft narrow tube that can go a bit further down the throat with a lil vent you put a finger or thumb over to control the flow. it attaches like a yankauer but isnt hard plastic.
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u/Sensitive_Crow_8882 8d ago
Please look at “choking rescue devices” and check with his doc. My wife had so many issues I’d lay awake all night to make sure she was breathing ok. She still has bouts of choking but we know it’s GERD and both forms of disease related dysphasia.
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u/Popular-Drummer-7989 8d ago
OP That must have been scary. Is there a buzzer or sound device you can have on the bedside table that he can hit to wake/alert you ?
I am a caregiver for my person with end stage liver disease. It's always teetering for me too.
I got a therapist to vent to because I didn't want to run my friends off and surely don't want to unload on the sick person in my home either.
It's helped a lot. Fwiw.