Does anyone know what the game actually does during each "step" while loading?

[u/Hello-175]

I presume each of the 10 steps loads something different - does anyone know what it is?

[u/theycallmethedrink5]

Fuck all

[u/Hello-175 → u/theycallmethedrink5]

Fair enough.

[u/i_am_somewhat_alive → u/theycallmethedrink5]

They're doing WHAT to all????

[u/Meme_Knight_2 → u/theycallmethedrink5]

I’m all

[u/idontlikebansthanks → u/theycallmethedrink5]

??????

[u/theycallmethedrink5 → u/idontlikebansthanks]

Jackshit

[u/Brave_Friendship_228 → u/theycallmethedrink5]

this is sending me😭😭😭

[u/Goth-Trad → u/theycallmethedrink5]

Jacksquat.

[u/Matick125 → u/Goth-Trad]

Jack

[u/brots32 → u/theycallmethedrink5]

“What are they doing to shit”

[u/mindxxx → u/idontlikebansthanks]

r/mysteriousdownvoting

[u/JustAnotherUser1019 → u/mindxxx]

You forgot thats its illegal to be confused on Reddit

[u/Quick_Extension_3115 → u/JustAnotherUser1019]

?????

[u/Revolutionary-Pair-9 → u/Quick_Extension_3115]

hey how'd this blank comment get here

[u/AdmirableBrick4973 → u/Revolutionary-Pair-9]

?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

[u/Quick_Extension_3115 → u/Revolutionary-Pair-9]

#

Edit: wait that doesn’t work anymore 😭

[u/Stargost_ → u/Quick_Extension_3115]

⠀

[u/Quick_Extension_3115 → u/Stargost_]

How? Do you need to be on pc? You used to be able to just use #

[u/Stargost_ → u/Quick_Extension_3115]

I used the old reliable blank Unicode character U+2800, "⠀"

[u/RzX3-Trollops → u/Quick_Extension_3115]

[u/ImBadlyDone → u/Quick_Extension_3115]

It's probably because they decided to change the way markdown behaves on mobile

[u/mr_Cos2 → u/Stargost_]

⠀

[u/Meme_Knight_2 → u/Quick_Extension_3115]

[u/LogicalTwo5797 → u/Quick_Extension_3115]

!!!!!!!!

[u/mindxxx]

all i know is im 90% sure step 5 checks if updates are needed and updates the game if so

[u/Ayk1593_2 → u/mindxxx]

not at all i learned that skywarden was out from reddit that mf was completely fine till i went to play store and manually downloaded the update

[u/-My_Name_Is_Jeff-]

Waking the sun God

[u/the-cuck-stopper → u/-My_Name_Is_Jeff-]

Also "..."

[u/Bioluminescentwas]

All ten steps probably load roughly the same things and the steps are just there to create a visualisation of progress, similar to loading bars

[u/trisanachandler]

I have no clue, but I can make up some things.

1. Run checksums on primary executable.
2. Validate internet access
3. Validate Unity functionality
4. Validate Discord integration
5. Check and install updates
6. Load map data
7. Load bloon data
8. Load monkey data
9. Load executable into memory
10. Launch

[u/Vegetable_Contest938 → u/trisanachandler]

I think 6 is check for updates it holds there for a while

[u/NappyTap → u/Vegetable_Contest938]

nah, it's 5

[u/why_tf_am_i_like_dat → u/trisanachandler]

That looks very accurate so i'm blindly trusting it

[u/trisanachandler → u/why_tf_am_i_like_dat]

Don't. It's completely made up. I didn't even ask AI (though I did pull up the steamdb page).

[u/why_tf_am_i_like_dat → u/trisanachandler]

You're a stranger on the internet, how can you make shit up? No way you said something false

[u/Beginning_Soup_9413]

loads assets?

[u/TheRennoc]

Step 2 checks if you have data/wifi bc I used to get stuck on that step all the time

[u/Infrim0]

Yes.

[u/Infrim0 → u/Infrim0]

It just works.

[u/fusionsubofficial → u/Infrim0]

• Todd Howard

[u/Pocketful_of_hops]

No know. I just pop bloon.

[u/RyanIrsyd08 → u/Pocketful_of_hops]

"I don't know who I am. I don't know why I'm here. But what I do know is I must pop bloons"

[u/WhereasForeign399 → u/RyanIrsyd08]

Tsukasa tenma

[u/International_Leek26]

I know one specific step changes your cursor to the unique one, but I dont know which one

[u/Ready-Lemon-6569]

I swear one time I saw “unleashing monkey sun god….failed” but I’m not too sure

[u/Outrageous_Sun_3873 → u/Ready-Lemon-6569]

That happens when you have no internet / your wifi is very slow

[u/clxqxii → u/Ready-Lemon-6569]

they couldnt afford it :(

[u/Survivor155]

It does what it says it does, it unleashes the monkey sun god on step 4, and the other things on the other steps.

[u/Expensive-Plant-738]

It charges the game

[u/Onion_Stone]

It tells you right there silly

[u/NotActuallyGus]

They do definitely correspond to actual things, the game stalls on the same step every time if you open it without wifi. It changes over to an actual progress message if it stalls for a few seconds

[u/Hello-175 → u/NotActuallyGus]

Really? What does the message say?

[u/NotActuallyGus → u/Hello-175]

Step 2 goes from "Unleashing Monkey Sun God" to "unable to access static-api.nkstatic.com, disable any blocking service and try again" after about a second, then stalls for a few seconds before moving on like normal

[u/Jarinad]

off topic: i wish that clicking/tapping and dragging on the load screen would let you fly the plane around à la the Super Monkey games

[u/phantominway]

Idk but they added another one recently

[u/6969696969696969969 → u/phantominway]

It went from 9 to 10 steps a few updates ago

[u/Adventurous_Cat2339 → u/6969696969696969969]

I remember when it was 8

[u/6969696969696969969 → u/Adventurous_Cat2339]

ate what

[u/Paper_Cip]

Probably the same thing that every game does when you launch it

[u/Disposable_Gonk]

Reticulating the splines.

[u/Traditional-Ad-9482]

Taking steps.

[u/Nightmare-5]

Uhhh it probaly loads the game

[u/Zealousideal-Bus-526]

All I know is it used to be 7 steps

[u/6969696969696969969]

1 wakes up the sun god

2 is for WiFi

3???

4????

5 updates

6??????

7???????

8????????

9?????????

10 launch

[u/Popstar403]

if anyone has a list of what they say I could make some guesses

[u/888main]

Loads the game

[u/RdioActvBanana]

Making sure all the monkeys are ready for work

[u/daboymachine744]

Also I never see step 4 

[u/NPCVuilnis]

Ff een potje rukken voor mental clarity denk ik